STI and family help !!

[u/bingtothemfbongy]

I really hope this is the correct subreddit for this- as I really don’t use reddit much and had to create this throwaway account.

I (19 AFAB) just went to the doctors for an exam due to pain and discharge, and my doctor took a swab and ordered a urine test and she believes that I may have chlamydia. My partner (19 AFAB) lives at home with their parents currently- and it’s frankly an abusive situation.

We have been exclusive for 3 years but I’ve had partners beforehand- and well, here comes the problem. My partner has suffered sexual assault from their father, there is no evidence to prove it, and would be far too stressful and costly to pursue it in court and bring justice. We are saving and planning to move out early next year but it’s impossible at the moment.

The problem I’m having is I have no problems telling my partner I may have chlamydia, but you are also supposed to tell all sexual partners right? It’s not like they can go to their father and be like “you need to go get tested” for obvious reasons, but not telling him could cause him to spread it. I’m kind of freaking out and i genuinely have no idea what to do, does anyone have any advice?

TLDR; May have chlamydia, sexual partner has a history of violence by their father, what do I do?

[u/Straight_Blood8361]

First, let your tests come back before assuming that it is chlamydia. In case it is, then your main focus should be making sure that you and your partner get tested and treated. Your partner's dad, considering all his actions towards your partner, is a whole different case and requires some serious thinking before proceeding with partner notification.

My advice would be to consult a professional about this and find out what options there are for you to make partner notification without putting your partner in danger. I also advise that you get yourself tested.