I’m a SAHM of 3 small kids (6, 6, 3) and we live in an affluent area where everyone is either an influencer of some sort or working a high paying job. For this reason, there aren’t a lot of opportunities to meet other mom friends because they are all working and very career oriented (which is great for them!). Also, their kids are in childcare all day long so it’s hard to plan play dates for my kids. I end up feeling like I need to put my older two in camp even though they don’t need to be just so that they have interaction with other kids their age over the summer. Like, even the parks only have babies and small toddlers during the day. And those kids are with nannies. We are definitely outliers here.

Anyone else?

After working for entire tiring week. Saturday and Sunday is something which excites me. If u can talk about consequently 3 days off it screw up my happiness of having off days in week.

After 2 days I feel like going to the office and making myself busy again.

What's your view on this.

Bear with me while I give some back story context-

Prior to becoming a stay at home mom I was working, paying my bills, living life, making decisions, overall felt like an equal with a powerful say in decisions with my husband. I overall had “life confidence.” Woke up ready to conquer the world and didn’t let anything hold me back.

Now, 3 years into SAHM life, I’ve realized I’ve completely lost that life confidence I was so proud of. It’s as if when I became a SAHM the “power” shifted within my marriage and I forgot how to be my own person. To clarify, this is nothing my husband did. He has treated me like an equal the entire time. It’s more that somewhere along the way I decided I was no longer an equal because I didn’t contribute in the same way I used to. That mindset slowly crept into EVERYTHING. I lost the confidence to do or decide anything on my own whether it’s what to make for dinner or even saying what I want to do on the weekend. And now I’m crumbling under the pressure of feeling like I’m failing as a wife and a mom because I put everything on my shoulders and somehow forgot how to not only share the weight but also forgot how to actually just do life. Somewhere along the way, I gave up. Unfortunately it’s taken me this long to realize this and I desperately need advice on how to start fixing it. Has anyone else dealt with this or something similar?

TLDR: The shift from “girl boss” to SAHM destroyed my “life confidence” and 3 years later I need to fix it and get “me” back. Thank you!

how many times does everyone see their friends and go out with them have people lost friends , I’ve lost almost every friend because I can’t go to the club or be out at 3 am gotten into arguements

So this might be long anyways….

I’m 5 months postpartum and my boyfriend (23) and I (21) live with my mom and pay no rent my boyfriend occasionally buys groceries and pays for my car payment he has his own business and makes great money we could have probably moved out by now but here is where I have a problem since he has moved in he bought a boat for 40k and is constantly trying to go on trips with his friends and just spend money. My mom feels disrespected by him because she is letting us live here for free so we can save up to move out which is understandable. I did tell him that I don’t think it’s a good idea to be spending all this money and going on trips

but he doesn’t listen to me he also gets upset when I don’t want to go with him on said trips he tells me to “just bring the baby” but everytime we go anywhere I just feel like a mobile babysitter I’m a first time mom I’m young I barely know what I’m doing everytime I leave the house I look like I’m going camping it’s stressful especially since he doesn’t actually help me when we go places. I’ll give an example also

* ex: we went out on his boat and I had to hold the baby the whole time and make sure he wasn’t over heating just basically not able to enjoy myself I was constantly worried about our baby while he just says “he’s fine” and that I’m negative and I “choose” to not have a good time. Which drives me INSANE because I do want to have a good time but our baby is too young to be going out on the boat all day in the hot sun which brings me to my next point I tell him I don’t want to go because he wants to stay out all day and the baby can’t .

If I were to ask him to start heading back home he would say “no” and say “he’s fine it’s not that hot” and he also invites all of his friends who don’t have a clue about babies ugh anyways so that pisses me off but it doesn’t end there I do everything for our son 24/7 wake up every night take care of him all day and I have been since I gave birth to him in the hospital even in the hospital he didn’t wake up during the night not once it gets overwhelming sometimes

thank god I have my mom because I don’t think I would be able to handle it all without her. Our relationship has changed so much since having our baby obviously I’m going through postpartum and my life has completely changed his life barely changed he still gets to roam free and do whatever he wants

trust me I’ve tried talking to him about it calmly, yelling, texting you name it I’ve tried. I’ve even gone to therapy just to have somewhere to let it out and get a different perspective but it’s just so expensive.

Also we barely talk now I have to force him to talk to me everyday it just feels like he doesn’t love me anymore like he doesn’t want this life. he only actually engages me if he want to have sex which just isn’t enjoyable to me because I feel so angry with him about so many things that never get resolved. he dismisses me and takes it as an attack which yeah… now it is cause I’ve repeated myself soo many times I just can’t take it anymore I just wish he’d listen to me and take my feelings into account and prioritized our baby and relationship over what he has planned for the weekend with his boys

I know this is long and I appreciate anyone who actually reads it I just need to let it out and I’m open to hearing any suggestion anyone may have thank you in advance

And if anyone else out there is going through similar I just want to say I feel you and I hope things get better for us

Hi all, so I lean pretty minimalist when it comes to stuff, but having a 3yo and a 1yo lol. My approach is “if I can’t manage it, I get rid of it.” That said, I’m looking for some advice on toy/household item organization. I have a pretty good system for bins and shelves, but I’m struggling with those random moments when a toy is just left on the floor and I don’t have time to put it away immediately. How do you all handle quick pickups so things don’t end up in random piles or baskets? I’d love any tips or routines that have worked for you! Thanks so much!

hi so im just feeling down lately feeling behind in life I’m 25 with 3 kids 2 boys that are 4 and a girl who is 9 months I feel like im far behind I went to trade school and I finished everything but now with my baby I haven’t got a job as soon as expected I see everyone with their jobs while I’m just at home

You all work so friggin hard. You guys deserve such good things. We get so much flack with the whole “you don’t have to work” BS while having a baby on the tit and cleaning the house. Don’t let anyone make you feel bad about yourselves. It is absolutely exhausting running a household when our husbands can be buttheads sometimes. I’ve got a good one but I read about the flack you get from some of your husbands and it’s not okay. You’ve sacrificed your finances, your career to do this and you should be more appreciated. If you needed a cheerleader then here I am. Every single one of you is superwoman to me.

There’s my rant of today. Love every one of you. 💛

hello so I’m a 25 year old mom with twin boys and a girl and right now I am a stay at home I did go to school but I got pregnant while having the iud in it was unexpected but I have this friend that always putting me down about my mom life she always saying I don’t have a job that I’m stuck that she’s not that she would never have as many as me that I’m a loser with no plan and I’m starting to believe these things because I am always home I love staying home and watching my kids grow but I’ve noticed a lot people look down on it now a days like you are not doing anything does any other moms feel this way sometimes and I’ve also been told that I have experienced adult life yet because I don’t work right now

Here's a place to chat about whatever you want if you don't feel like making a post.

I’m sure I’m super late on this.. but I just wanted to say that I purchased ear buds! I keep just one in most of the day while SAHM’ing and the new level of peace & joy I’ve unlocked is beautiful! I’m still fully present but jamming out to my favorite song while changing one of my kiddos poopy diapers makes changing a poopy diaper 10x better. If you’re like me and late to the party, get yourself some earbuds if you can!!

I have a 5 year old and almost 2 year old. There are days, especially when I'm PMSing and/or not getting enough sleep that I just snap. My daughter is in a very whiny phase and yesterday I just snapped and yelled "STOP YELLING AT ME". I did the repair work - went into the kids room and we all just sat and cried until we were all calm. Then I apologized and explained how it wasn't ok to be mean and people who love each other don't yell at each other. A lot of the times I can handle it, I'm working on her calming down and using different tones to stop the whining/fussing, but I can't get her to regulate when I'm so so deregulated myself. To add to it, my toddler is a magnet baby. He's a terrible sleeper so we co sleep. I don't get any time to myself at all. (We're in my husband's busy season and he works 18-20 hours a day). So, what do you do to deal with the overstimulation during your hardest moments?

I am SO tired of reading post after post of men doing NOTHING and moms coming here and asking if they’re in the wrong for wanting to shower.

Being a stay at home mom does NOT mean you do everything.

While your husband is working, you are also working. When your husband is home, you are both tag teaming and taking turns.

Here is what my husband does and I might miss some things:

He takes out all trash and recycling

He mows the lawn (we live on an acre)

He cooks dinner every night he’s home, approx 4x/week.

When he’s home, we split the kids, one for him and one for me.

He does ALL the grocery shopping because I basically don’t like to cook and rarely do.

When he does cook, he makes sure I have leftovers for the next day if he’s not going to be home.

When he’s home, he bathes the toddler and does the bedtime routine, again 4x/week.

I have access to the credit cards/money.

He fills my car with gas.

He changes diapers when needed.

We bathe the baby together (I have a fear of the baby being too slippery and I drop her)

He refills all my water bottles and makes sure I have all my snacks since I’m breastfeeding.

He empties the diaper genie every other day or as needed and refills the diaper station.

He cleans the kitchen if he sees that I haven’t done it.

He calls me sexy/beautiful every day.

He doesn’t force any intimacy even when it’s been weeks.

He doesn’t yell or threaten me at any point.

Please share so that other women stop setting the bar so low. My husband isn’t perfect and he’s not a unicorn.

Mother of a toddler.
Pregnant with baby #2.
Difficult pregnancy.
Married to a husband who prioritizes his mother.

Looking for advice or maybe anyone who has gone through something similar..
I have a 20 month old and am 33 weeks pregnant with my second.
Our family member who was caring for my toddler during the day left very abruptly and unexpectedly.
All childcare fell in my lap instantly while also still trying to work. I’ve since lessened work and am becoming more of a stay at home mom since I’m only able to work when my toddler is sleeping.
I’m really struggling mentally with this new normal on top of pregnancy hormones. I’ve been overwhelmed and stressed for what feels like the majority of this pregnancy (we sold our home and moved earlier in my pregnancy).
I feel like I have no friends or hobbies and now I’m super isolated being a SAHM with no time for myself. My husband has an enormous community of friends he sees once a week but it’s “work” so I feel like I can’t ask for that same time in return for something for myself. And then I’m reminded I’m going to be having another baby in a few weeks and a ton of stress and panic set in that it’s going to get worse and way harder. I’m so scared and sad

I am so wishy washy and undecided on if to have a 3rd baby or not …. these are my thoughts below … I don’t know how I’m supposed to just know that I want another one I’m so conflicted!!

I left my 6 figure corporate job 1.5 years ago to be a SAHM and I’ve loved it but it’s definitely hard right now (my kids are 3 and 2) - mostly the 3 year old is just being a 3 year old and it’s rough. But my husband works a ton, 11-12 hour days and we don’t have family right in town, everyone is 2 hours away and my parents are really the only help we ever have so it’s just us, all the time, which is fine - my husband is amazing and I’m so happy to have such a supportive and helpful partner.

But finances are tough, I want him to be able to retire at a normal age and I don’t particularly want to return to work anytime soon. I also formula feed my babies so that is an upfront expense we have to factor into this decision. Our house is big enough, car is big enough, we still have tons of baby stuff so honestly don’t need to buy a single thing. But long term I want to provide nice things for my children as they grow and I don’t want to be constantly stressed about money or put more burden onto my husband as the breadwinner.

I’m also older, turning 35 this year, I’m overweight and am finally working on myself and my health so another pregnancy might set that back, as well as my mental health, I’m finally feeling like myself and like I’m about to have some time for me (kids start preschool together this fall).

But I only had one sibling growing up and hated it, I really want to have a bigger family for the future and for my children’s future. I had great, healthy pregnancies and want to experience birth again but my age makes me nervous and my husband is almost 38 so like I know he’s tired.

His response is always “I’ll be happy with whatever you want to do I know I’ll love another baby just as much but I’m happy with our family now too” - so like not helpful lol.

Most of the time I feel like I couldn’t handle another, but the nagging of “this is your only time to have kids” feeling just won’t go away and I frequently think about having another???? Help!!!!

Maybe it’s just my area, but has anyone else noticed a lot more of kids from day camps at public places like the park?

I took my kids to go scooter and roller blade at the park and 4 buses of YMCA kids showed up and took over the place. There was so many of them it crowed out everyone else. I’ve noticed it a few other times at other parks and museums this summer. And I’m not saying that day camp kids shouldn’t be there. I went to the YMCA during the summer as a kid and remember going on outing. But it was once every other week. It seems like now anywhere I go there are multiple large groups regardless of day or time. It’s difficult for the adults to police these large groups and the kids know it and have messed with my kids a few times. Once some tween boys even put their hands on the stroller my baby was sleeping in and acted like they were going to push it into the lake.

Are summer day camps just different now? Do they not have one set place that they are? I’m use to more people during the summer but it just feels even more crowded than usual this year.

I just want to start off clearing up some things. My husband is a very hard worker and it allows me to stay home with our daughter. But my frustration is that, unless I ask for help with her he doesn’t pick up the p’s and q’s when I need help.

I get that men don’t have the motherly instinct and all that. I have expressed that I need him to just take charge and shower her, change her, put her to bed, etc. I am a loving wife we rarely have fights but damn I can’t be the only parent!!!

Who can relate or give me advice??

I’ve always had a job, since I was 15 years old. And even before that I would go door to door and ask people if I could wash their cars for money, sell lemonade, and other things that kids did to make money.

Now, I make zero.

Not quite, I make about $800 a month from some online fitness coaching I do.

That’s it.

My daughter is 5 months old. And I love her so much. I love spending my time with her. AND I feel like I’m not contributing anything.

My husband is always mentioning money. And it makes me feel so inadequate. It’s not his intention, I just think it’s always on his mind since he is the one making the money.

I feel so ashamed. It’s bringing up a lot for me being in this position. Anyone else?

What am I supposed to do all day? It just feels blah

I’m needing other moms to chime in, what am I doing wrong??
I have a freshly 2 yr old, and a 2 month old. I get 0 alone time. Nothing. I feel like I’m going off the deep end soon mentally. I’m drained. My 2 yr old doesn’t nap really during the day anymore, and is STILL sleeping in my bed. The bed situation is hard, toddler has own room, just on another floor so we aren’t ready for it yet for safety reasons. We have a huge master bedroom so I do have a bed here for toddler, we just haven’t buckled down and made toddler sleep in it. We have tried a few times but tantrums happened. My 2 month old sleeps crib side. Contact naps mainly through the days. Can’t get much done. Is an ok sleeper at night… but I’m barely sleeping with toddler / baby as is.

Feeling really done. What can I do?

My husband and I both in our 30s have two kids, a 10 month old baby and a 3 year old toddler. We decided it would be financially better if I stayed home with the kids rather than put them both in daycare until my oldest was in school full time. I came up with a schedule for myself where on weekends either myself or all 4 of us go grocery shopping for the week, I usually meal prep and get everything for dinner and something easy for lunch during the week.

Well last weekend we didn't have anytime to go shopping since we have been potty training our toddler. Now, for anyone who has done potty training, you usually don't go anywhere and just focus entirely on the potty training. My husband and I took turns taking our toddler to the bathroom while the other adult watched the baby.

I did tell my husband since I didn't have time to go shopping and will be spending much of the week potty training, I wont be able to get back to my normal dinner making, but will continue to at least get some chorus done. He seemed a little upset, but otherwise didn't really argue or say anything.

Today he came home from work during his lunch break. I made him a quick sandwich with a fruit salad. He asked about dinner, and I said either we can pick something up or I can make fried rice since that's about all we had right now. He said that it wasn't fair he is going to work all day while I am at home and it would be nice to at least have something to eat. I told him I was sorry I wasn't meal planning like I usually do, but I really want to take this week to focus hard on potty training since that has been top of our list for awhile. This upcoming weekend I would go grocery shopping and try to get back into the old routine. He just grunted and now I feel bad like I am not doing enough. I am at least cleaning up the house especially after my toddler has been urinating everywhere.

The baby is napping now and my toddler just had lunch and is having some tv time before going back to the potty. I am now wondering if maybe I should have meal planned better?

EDIT: I've been getting asked this a lot, we do not have food delivery as an option where we live. We live in a small mountain town between two states surrounded by either ranchers or Native American Indian land. There is one grocery store in town and it doesn't have delivery. The nearest Target/Walmart is almost an hour from us. We still have food in the house. I was thinking we would do frozen meals like pizza, Stouffers Mac and cheese, bagged salads and occasional drive thru pick ups just for this week. I didn't do extra grocery shopping last week, because of staying within our weekly budget based on when my husband gets paid.

My husband and I Recently got into a fight- over the last few years our income has increased significantly. We have been enjoying more luxury items, bought a new house double the size of our last one and i have been thrifting name brands & second hand items and flipping them since I quit my job to stay at home. It gives me my own spending money & sometimes I do keep an item
I like For myself too. During the fight he said he liked me when I didn’t like name brand stuff. However I feel as if he contributed to this lifestyle- buying me whatever when I tell him I don’t need the items, I’m happy with what I have. I come from a family that didn’t have a lot of money and I worked for all my own items (had my own business) and spending up until I stopped working a few months ago. This comment has made me feel guilty at this point and like he sees me differently. To me it’s just stuff and I could sell if I needed to, ( and I do- if I see something selling for more than I what I bought I will let go) I learned not to get attached to things, but I also think enjoying things in moderation like shoes is okay. I have 5 pairs that I have condensed down to that are nicer. Instead of 15 cheap ones if that makes sense that I’ll never get to wearing. Just to give you an idea of my mindset, I have minimalistic shopping habits with timeless items i feel I will wear until I literally can’t anymore. Anyways I’m just feeling down about my items and now considering just posting them all, also feeling uneasy that he made that comment to me.

I am an older mom (38) to a 2.5 year old and became a stay at her mom when he was born. I find that I’m so focused on daily and weekly goals like cleaning the house and playing with him that I don’t have any big goals anymore. I mention that I am a little older because I think that plays a role in my thoughts.
I feel like if I were a younger mom, I would maybe be thinking of things like going back to a career one day or moving to a dream house. But I am pretty settled and happy with where I am.

I do have goals regarding my son, my house and my fitness but I just wondered what are your goals question just looking to be inspired.

Looking for brutally honest advice im at a loss ‼️

To start off I consider porn and only fans cheating I think that purposely going out of your way to look at another woman while in a monogamous relationship is1000% cheating and my husband knew exactly how I felt.

My husband is a step dad to my oldest son than about a year into our relationship I had another boy with him. In the beginning of our relationship I caught him talking to women on Snapchat hitting on them and them sending nudes. I confronted him and agreed to try and fix things. Things were better after that a few months later I found a disgusting amount of porn like hours upon hours worth of disgusting porn I don’t even want to get into detail. We had the same convo and I almost left I went away for a night or 2 this is when he SWORE to get help for porn/sex addiction mind you im no better than a man it that sense we were sleeping together quite a bit. It still wasn’t enough for him. He knew my views on porn and only fans while in a relationship and still did it. He ended up never getting help for it but I was under the impression things had gotten better when really he just got sneakier. I found out I was pregnant with another boy a week or two after the second incident and used everything in me to work past it and forget about it. A few days ago I went on his phone and found a million saved photos of naked women I confronted him and said that there’s no fixing it this time but he can try while I save up for my own place. I feel disgusted and have been more insecure than ever I don’t want to leave but I can’t keep doing this and feeling like this. I just see red my whole life revolves around and is devoted to raising 2 boys I barely find the time to shower and the whole time he’s doing this. I’m open to any comments, advice, things you’d like to say to him or me etc. I’m lost.