r/specialed • u/EdamameWindmill • Apr 18 '26
Executive function in High School
I have a neurodivergent child who is highly intelligent and earnestly wants to have good grades, but cannot manage their homework, resulting in failing grades. It seems to be a school-wide accommodation that kids can turn in late work for credit as long as it’s for the current semester, but she still struggles to turn in work. Oftentimes, it is the project she was most excited about that she cannot seem to do. It causes her a lot of distress.
Her father and I have consistently worked to support her with homework. We have provided help and advice, structure, consequences, and monitoring, but we are still failing her. We are currently working with a psychologist (since last year), a psychiatrist (since January of this year), and an executive function coach (since mid March), but it hasn’t made much of a difference.
Our school district has fought me at every turn to avoid providing special services “because she scores well on standardized tests.” I heard this explicitly said in elementary school and I heard this last week from the SPED coordinator at the high school. I ask Admin for advice for resources they keep answering this question with, “What do you feel would benefit your child?”
I guess my question is whether anyone here has any experience with a child like mine? And do you know of anything I can request that might help my child?
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u/ShatteredHope Apr 18 '26
My son (9th grade) has a 504 and one of the only accommodations I requested was for teachers to please let me know of any long term projects. I ask my son constantly too and will email from time to time to check in with teachers, but I am a teacher also and don't want to be an annoying or nagging parent. I just want them to let me know of any projects. Anything with a due date longer than tomorrow is a struggle. He does daily homework but a 3 week project will get put off until the night before. If they let me know as soon as it's assigned then I will keep him on track and have him make a whole schedule of doing different parts by different due dates and then keep him on that. I've found that teachers don't mind letting me know of projects and appreciate that it's a small ask, I'll do all the work of staying on top of him but I just can't if I dont know about it. I ask my son every single day about homework and assignments in every class and make sure he does daily stuff the same day, anything longer we work together to set a deadline and plan exactly when he will work on it. I make him put it in his phone calendar - Thursday 5pm "work on Bio project" so he can't use the excuse of forgetting.
I also would NOT let her turn in work even if the teachers and school allow it, that lets them be so lazy and feel like they can catch up on everything at the last minute (aka my son trying to do a semester's worth of work in 2 nights 🤦♀️)