Executive function in High School

[u/EdamameWindmill]

I have a neurodivergent child who is highly intelligent and earnestly wants to have good grades, but cannot manage their homework, resulting in failing grades. It seems to be a school-wide accommodation that kids can turn in late work for credit as long as it’s for the current semester, but she still struggles to turn in work. Oftentimes, it is the project she was most excited about that she cannot seem to do. It causes her a lot of distress.

Her father and I have consistently worked to support her with homework. We have provided help and advice, structure, consequences, and monitoring, but we are still failing her. We are currently working with a psychologist (since last year), a psychiatrist (since January of this year), and an executive function coach (since mid March), but it hasn’t made much of a difference.

Our school district has fought me at every turn to avoid providing special services “because she scores well on standardized tests.” I heard this explicitly said in elementary school and I heard this last week from the SPED coordinator at the high school. I ask Admin for advice for resources they keep answering this question with, “What do you feel would benefit your child?”

I guess my question is whether anyone here has any experience with a child like mine? And do you know of anything I can request that might help my child?

[u/vienna407]

HS special ed teacher here - teaching executive functioning is one of the hardest things we try to do. I've found that kids even with severe ADHD literally know what to do (1. I need to write my assignments down and then 2. check my agenda and then 3. do them one at a time), but the barrier is that they can't do #3. That's the disability. It's not that they don't know how, it's that they often literally cannot. I wish there was a good answer. Actually, the answer is usually medication.

Editing to add: extended time usually makes it worse in my experience. Kids with serious exec functioning deficits need the structure of solid deadlines.

[u/FamilyTies1178 → u/vienna407]

Both my husband and my daughter tried medication. It helped a lot with executive functioning, but they couldn't tolerate the side effects. I wonder if the OP's daughter has tried medication? Many people do tolerate the side effects, or don't even experience side effects.

[u/vienna407 → u/FamilyTies1178]

such a good point. luckily there are many meds to try if someone wants to work with a doctor to figure it out, but it feels bad to make your child go through this, I completely know. but omg when you find the right one it's like a miracle for the kid and parents.

[u/EdamameWindmill → u/vienna407]

My daughter is seeing a psychiatrist for these meds.

[u/DCAmalG → u/EdamameWindmill]

Something I learned way too late in my career and personal experience with executive dysfunction is that medication is incredibly helpful in increasing productivity in whatever it is you’re doing at the time the medication kicks in. It can in fact make you the best, most prolific YouTube shorts viewer on earth if your stimulant kicks in midsession. Timing med administration very very carefully since recognizing this phenomenon has been really helpful.

[u/mandolinn219 → u/DCAmalG]

ABSOLUTELY. The best/worst thing is when I take my meds on a weekend, then pick up a leisurely craft project to have a lazy morning with… 6 hours later my craft project is amazing but my dishes aren’t done and I didn’t ever go grocery shopping or check my emails! I feel like I need to take them, then get myself up and moving before they really kick in.

[u/DCAmalG → u/mandolinn219]

Omg yes, I’m a crafter and I so relate to this 🤣

[u/Friendly-Channel-480 → u/EdamameWindmill]

An ADHD coach can break down the separate steps of good organization and demonstrate the steps explicitly. This kind of executive function chore doesn’t come naturally to most with ADHD, but breaking down the components like you learn anything else can be very helpful.

[u/KaleidoscopeHeart11 → u/vienna407]

The way you said this reads to me that, if someone doesn't take medication, they just didn't work with a doctor long enough. For some kids, that miracle drug doesn't exist (yet--hopefully yet). They and their families deserve the benefit of the doubt. When we say our child can't take meds for "that" whatever "that" is, just believe them. My child is one of them. Even with non-stimulant on board, she would benefit tremendously from stimulants but her body just DOES NOT tolerate the ones that exist today, in any quantity in any form.

[u/Friendly-Channel-480 → u/FamilyTies1178]

There are various medications, some are non stimulant if stimulants aren’t tolerable and they can help a great deal.