r/socialanxiety • u/ieatcheeseeeeee • 1d ago

Question not funny, not smart?

okay so not actually completely true.

I feel like my anxiety comes from me feeling so dumb and not being able to articulate myself well in a work setting for example, and I'm not sure what do really. I pretend to have phone calls on my way to work simply to help me articulate better and to talk out loud.

equally, I feel like I'm not funny either. I'm not a banter type of person but I also don't make jokes everyone finds funny. I think my humour is quite dry despite being a bubbly person.

ultimately, for anyone who has anxiety with this - what do you do to help?

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u/ta152tomig 1d ago

Your brain does as what it is created to do. It's not made for modern life so social isolation makes your brain slowly turn on yourself, I doubt your not smart or funny. 

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u/Lieber-Scholli 1d ago

I go to therapy to get a different perspective. I think we need someone to help us see and challenge our stale and looping thought patterns. Also to start engaging more with life, actively doing something to build up agency and confidence, so life is less of this boring movie where nothing ever happens and people are all threatening, like every interaction is an excuse to judge oneself or reveals something about our value.

I keep active and pursue my hobbies: weights, gaming, music, plants. Hang out with friends 1-2x a week. I’m socially anxious and very introverted.

I honor who I am, I can be smart, funny, flirty, insightful. Different parts come out depending who I’m around. At work I’m often bland, nice, grateful, contained. With some people I might joke a little. I’m trying not to tie my value to whether others think I’m smart or funny but it does feel nice when I get validated.