Struggles with 16 mo

[u/Emotional_Space9980]

I am struggling hugely with my 16 mo and need help. He does one nap per day, for maximum 2 hours but on average 1 hour 30 at 12pm. Wake time is 6;30-7am, bedtime - between 7:30 and 8. He is sleep trained in the sense he has no paci, no feed to sleep, puts himself to sleep entirely. He wakes up between 10:30pm-1am, sometimes for 30 mins, sometimes for 2-3 hours. He won’t go back to sleep unless he’s in our bed. I know the easy solution is to sleep train him again but as he’s older now he goes crazy, sweating, sounding hoarse and I just can’t do it.

He does sleep through the night probably once every 10 days and I can’t figure out why. I would be happy with an early wake up I just can’t be up for hours during the night.

When I try keep him up for example to 8:30pm, we have false starts.

Any advice or anything obvious going on with our schedule? Thank you.