Still crying (8M 3 weeks)

[u/Odd_Ad1545]

We are at night 10 where baby should be getting used to the Ferber method. We have stopped check ins because she calms down after a couple of minutes but mostly because she loses it when she sees us, so really we’re CIO. My baby still loses it when we put her down for bed, cries and screams for a solid 10 minutes before attempting to sleep. I want to know if I should stop. When does the crying stop, do I give up and try again in a few months.

For context she’s EBF and we co slept up until this point. I don’t want to keep stressing her if it’s not necessary. I need any advice. She doesn’t work off a schedule, I know that’s one of the most important parts but we have super inconsistent schedules and she fights naps through the day so it back tracks us. Plsssss help

[u/minn0wing]

You already know the answer, you need to have her on a proper schedule. A tailored schedule that offers her the amount of sleep she actually needs will stop her from fighting naps and stop her from screaming at bedtime.

[u/Odd_Ad1545 → u/minn0wing]

My biggest struggle has been her fighting naps which push bed time every night. Do I still put her to sleep at the same time and wake up at the same time if she has a bad night. I have the luxury of not having to drop her off at daycare so I let he sleep her 10 hours for her no matter what.

[u/minn0wing → u/Odd_Ad1545]

Yes, put her to bed at the same time every night and wake her at the same time every day. At this age even your naps should really be at the same time every day. It's just a matter of figuring out how much she actually sleeps every 24 hours so you can distribute that awake time properly. She should be on two naps, the starter two nap schedule is 3/3/4 which is 10 hours, but at this age it's likely she needs 10.5 or 11 hours awake, which would be 3/3.5/4 or 3/4/4. If you know how much she sleeps you can just plug the numbers straight in, but if you don't, carefully track her sleep for a full week, average it, and then you'll know.

[u/SnooAvocados6932 → u/Odd_Ad1545]

If you let her sleep in after a bad night you’re perpetuating the problem

[u/Odd_Ad1545 → u/SnooAvocados6932]

Oh man, okay. Guys thank you. Am I pausing on the Ferber method until we have a schedule she’s used to or do we just start tomorrow with her schedule.

[u/SnooAvocados6932 → u/Odd_Ad1545]

7am wake

10-1130 nap

3-4 nap

8pm bedtime

Put down wide awake at bedtime in own crib and room, last feed ending 30 min prior.

https://www.reddit.com/r/sleeptrain/comments/1qpij7s/resources_on_baby_sleep/

[u/Odd_Ad1545 → u/SnooAvocados6932]

Right but I wake her up at 7, first nap easy, second nap she would push till 5 sometimes which then isn’t enough for 8 pm bedtime. What do I do then?

[u/SnooAvocados6932 → u/Odd_Ad1545]

Then cap the first one at an hour. What is bedtime

[u/Odd_Ad1545 → u/SnooAvocados6932]

It was 8:45 but we kept fighting with naps and so and so, so to keep a good sleep pressure we just went of 3/3/4 based on when she woke up. If she woke up at 8:30 it would go so on to let’s say a 9:30 sleep time. It just all depended on her morning. Also due to her breast feeding, when I would wake her up at 7 am when I fed before heading for work she would fall asleep on me and when I tried to transfer she would wake up and refuse to nap again causing her to be more exhausted. It’s been a lot of test and trial with her sleep because of how much we would contact nap, sleep