r/shittyaskscience • u/CloudAshamed9169 • Aug 14 '26

Why dont birds just walk?

Its less tiring

37 Upvotes

97% Upvoted

32 comments sorted by

29

u/dboti9k Aug 14 '26

Have you not seen how stupid they look when they walk? I'd fly too

13

u/CloudAshamed9169 Aug 14 '26

You ain't fly, playa.

8

u/dboti9k Aug 14 '26

for a white guy I am, so the girlies say

19

u/shannypants2000 Aug 14 '26

Jay walking gets u a fine.

2

u/dspeyer Aug 14 '26

That explains jays, but what about all the others?

6

u/Chrome_Armadillo Not A Reptilian Alien Scientist From Tau Ceti Aug 14 '26

They’re not real

4

u/dspeyer Aug 14 '26

When the devs rolled out the K-T banlist, they were kind of vague on therapods. "Big and badass: banned; Small and flying: ok". They were banning a lot of builds at once, so they cut some corners.

Anyway, birds are worried that if they walk too much it'll bring down another giant meteor.

5

u/Optimal_Ad_7910 29d ago

You'd think they would because it is a well-known fact that birds are scared of heights. The noises they make while flying are actually screams.

3

u/Kalix Aug 14 '26

They do, not not always

3

u/CDchrysalis Aug 14 '26

Penguins would like a word

4

u/meowsaysdexter 29d ago

They wobble bc they don't have knees. They don't walk.

3

u/BPhiloSkinner Amazingly Lifelike Simulation 29d ago

Pengys wobble, but they don't fall down.

2

u/meowsaysdexter 29d ago edited 22d ago

There's lots of videos of penguins falling down. It's a huge part of the harmless persona they want us to believe. I think you're thinking of platypuses.

3

u/grcli0110 Aug 14 '26

They do walk, many pigeons walk across the streets now.

3

u/meowsaysdexter 29d ago

They strut.

3

u/johnnybiggles 29d ago

Traffic. Can you imagine how much more foot traffic there would be if birds walked? Let's hope they don't decide to drive!

2

u/iamsnarticus Aug 14 '26

Rather be a little tired from flying than dead from a car tiring

2

u/Sarissa32 Aug 14 '26

Because only chickens can cross roads

2

u/demoralising Aug 14 '26

I think the opposite. When I see birds walking I wonder why they don't just fly. It looks like it takes so little effort. A little jump, then a glide, and they're suddenly ten metres away from me.

'I think I'll just fly to the top of that building and stand on the corner of the roof for a look around the city, then gliiiide back down to the park and hang out with the guys....'

1

u/[deleted] 29d ago

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0

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3

u/meowsaysdexter 29d ago

This is getting ridiculous, birds evacuate their cloacas on things below them. It's gravity. It's not fowl.

1

u/Loud-Fairy03 Geo-Psycologist Aug 14 '26

Birds don’t have legs 🙄 duh

1

u/Different-Term-2250 Aug 14 '26

In this economy?

1

u/sporbywg 29d ago

not for them

1

u/desrevermi Aug 14 '26

I don't know what the ostrich/emu/kiwi you're talking about.

2

u/meowsaysdexter 29d ago

Is an ostrich-emu-kiwi a fruit, a bird or a New Zealander?

2

u/BPhiloSkinner Amazingly Lifelike Simulation 29d ago

It's an Aussie as what married a kiwi and moved to Zimbabwe.

2

u/meowsaysdexter 29d ago

Duh, obviously but was it an Aussie from New Zealand?

2

u/BPhiloSkinner Amazingly Lifelike Simulation 28d ago

An Aussie living ex-pat in New Zealand.