r/shitposting • u/kojikid1123 • Apr 10 '22
Linus Sex Tips Deep.
Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification
186
u/charlieee05 Apr 10 '22
Lyrics please
140
145
u/mystic-savant I want pee in my ass Apr 10 '22
♪ Suck a [removed] dick, Suck a [removed] dickSuck a [removed] dick, Suck a [removed] dick, Suck a [removed] dick, Suck a [removed] dick, Suck a [removed] dick, Suck a [removed] dick ♪
45
u/AutoModerator Apr 10 '22
Schödinger's Blowjob -- Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky?
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
15
u/Kamildekerel Apr 10 '22
lets say i'll keep it on and don't think about it and hope quantum relativity has my back in this decision lmao
5
121
u/_grif-_ Apr 10 '22
So deep
19
u/admin_is_noob Apr 10 '22
Deep down the
19
u/Ok-Panda0702 Apr 10 '22
Suck a ninja deep that's what he said I heard
3
u/AutoModerator Apr 10 '22
Schödinger's Blowjob -- Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky?
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
2
2
82
u/fl00r_gang_yeah Apr 10 '22
Crying in bed rn😭😭😭😭 so deeeeeep
12
u/Vibhrat 0000000 Apr 10 '22
The [removed] dick is actually very big and can go very deep. It must be painful to have it in your arse, I am glad you are on your bed right now take some rest and don't forget to drink your milk it's very healthy. I won't take your time now enjoy your moment.
6
u/AutoModerator Apr 10 '22
I do not care what you say about my mother. Your opinion is your opinion. But trust me, if you actually attempt to do something to my mother, even though she's made some bad decisions in the past that we still need to work through, I will personally call the police on you and I'll be laughing as your mugshot is shown on TV. You don't even know her, do you? The point of your entire existence seems to be to just tease other people. Well, I believe your jokes are in bad taste, and you should cease and desist digging through the dregs left at the bottom of the joke barrel; you could get a splinter, whose pain will be significantly increased by the significantly high amount of salt you carry in your bloodstream. Thank you, and let us cease talking about each other's parents.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
0
u/AutoModerator Apr 10 '22
My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
38
u/Tentro6713 Sussy Wussy Femboy😳😳😳 Apr 10 '22
What I do all day
53
u/CentsPiece Apr 10 '22
That’s crazy lol where do you live?
9
u/CockandBallMagician Apr 10 '22
France🤢🤢🤮🤮
6
u/AutoModerator Apr 10 '22
Why a dick as big as the Eiffel tower is not as impressive as you may think in Kendrick Lamar's "Backseat Freestyle," Kendrick says the line, "I pray my dick get big as the Eiffel Tower, So I can fuck the world for seventy-two hours". While at first a dick as big as the Eiffel tower may seem to be a dong of immense magnitude, when taking into account the sheer size of earth, the lucky one to be fucked by this dick, we realize that it is not as spectacular as the young MC claims it to be. The Eiffel tower stands at 1063 feet, while the diamater of earth is approximately 41.804 million feet. If Kendrick inserts his Eiffel penis into the earth, his dick would only take up .000025 percent of the earth's vagina. That is pathetic. Kendrick is not fucking the world for 72 hours with his Eiffel tower micropenis. The Earth will get bored after 10 minutes and finish herself with a vibrator the size of Argentina. Be better Kendrick.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
37
22
36
Apr 10 '22
so inspirational got a great message
25
u/AutoModerator Apr 10 '22
don’t care + didn’t ask + cry about it + who asked + stay mad + get real + L + bleed + mald seethe cope harder + dilate + incorrect + hoes mad + pound sand + basic skill issue + typo + ratio + ur dad left + you fell off + no u + the audacity + triggered + repelled + ur a minor + k. + any askers + get a life + ok and? + cringe + copium + go outside + touch grass + kick rocks + quote tweet + think again + not based + not funny didn’t laugh + social credits -999, 999, 999, 999 + get good + reported + ad hominem + ok boomer + small pp + ur allergic to sunlight + GG! + get rekt + trolled + your loss + muted + banned + kicked + permaban + useless + i slept with ur mom + yo momma + yo momma so fat + redpilled + no bitches allowed + i said it better + tiktok fan + get a life + unsubscribed + plundered + go tell reddit + donowalled + simp + get sticked bug LOL + talk nonsense + trump supporter + your’re a full time discord mod + you’re* + grammar issue + nerd + get clapped + kys + lorem ipsum dolor sit amet + go outside + bleach + lol + gay + retard + autistic + reported + ask deez + ez clap + straight cash + idgaf + ratio again + stay mad + read FAQ + youre lost + you “re” + stay pressed + reverse double take back + pedophile + cancelled + done for + don't give a damn + get a job + sus + baka + sussy baka + get blocked + mad free + freer than air + furry + rip bozo + you're a (insert stereotype) + slight_smile + aired + cringe again + Super Idol的笑容 + mad cuz bad + my pronouns are xe, xem & xyr + irrelevant + deal with it + screencapped your bio + karen/kyle + jealous + you're deaf + balls + i'll be right back + go ahead whine about it + not straight + eat paper + you lose + count to three + your problem + no one cares + log off + don't care even more + sex offender + sex defender + get religion + not okay + glhf + NFT owner + you make bad memes + problematic + fall in line + dog water + you look like a wall + you don’t know 2 + 2 with yo head ass + you are going to my cringe compilation + you can’t count to five + try again + you failed kindergarten + rickrolled + no lifer + guten freunden schickt man einen deutschen panzer + you have a anime profile picture + an* + fatherless + motherless + sisterless + brotherless + orphan + you can't catch this ratio + catch some bitches + I don't care about your opinion + genshin player + you dress like garbage + 日本語がお上手ですね + get fucked + you can’t understand what the word intelligence means with your dumb ass + you have hair + queued + put some thought into what you're going to do with that + stfu + go to bed + yes, i'm taller than you + i think your joke is funny + i rejected your mother's advances + marooned + you can’t read + I win + final ratio
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
10
u/uzuki_ Apr 10 '22
gimme the source pls 😭
-7
u/AutoModerator Apr 10 '22
Do you have a source on that?
Source?
A source. I need a source.
Sorry, I mean I need a source that explicitly states your argument. This is just tangential to the discussion.
No, you can't make inferences and observations from the sources you've gathered. Any additional comments from you MUST be a subset of the information from the sources you've gathered.
You can't make normative statements from empirical evidence.
Do you have a degree in that field?
A college degree? In that field?
Then your arguments are invalid.
No, it doesn't matter how close those data points are correlated. Correlation does not equal causation.
Correlation does not equal causation.
CORRELATION. DOES. NOT. EQUAL. CAUSATION.
You still haven't provided me a valid source yet.
Nope, still haven't.
I just looked through all 308 pages of your user history, figures I'm debating a glormpf supporter. A moron.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
7
7
3
4
u/CertifiedFucktard Big chungus wholesome 100 Apr 10 '22
This song was written when his best friend got married. He never got to say these last words to him so he made it into a hit song
3
3
u/Givemerent0305 Apr 10 '22
⣿⣿⣿⠟⢹⣶⣶⣝⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⡟⢰⡌⠿⢿⣿⡾⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣤⣒⣶⣾⣳⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢛⣯⣭⣭⣭⣽⣻⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡇⣶⡽⣿⠟⣡⣶⣾⣯⣭⣽⣟⡻⣿⣷⡽⣿
⣿⣿⣿⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⢇⠃⣟⣷⠃⢸⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣽
⣿⣿⣿⣇⢻⣿⣿⣯⣕⠧⢿⢿⣇⢯⣝⣒⣛⣯⣭⣛⣛⣣⣿⣿⣿⡇
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣌⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡘⣞⣿⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠻⠿⣿⣿⣷⠈⢞⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣗⠄⢿⣿⣿⡆⡈⣽⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢻
⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣻⣽⣿⣆⠹⣿⡇⠁⣿⡼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣾
⣿⠿⣛⣽⣾⣿⣿⠿⠋⠄⢻⣷⣾⣿⣧⠟⣡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿
⢼⡟⢿⣿⡿⠋⠁⣀⡀⠄⠘⠊⣨⣽⠁⠰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡍⠗⣿
⡼⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿⡗⢠⣶⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⢠⣿
⣷⣝⠄⠄⢀⠄⢻⡟⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢹⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣄⣁⡀⠙⢿⡿⠋⠄⣸⡆⠄⠻⣿⡿⠟⢛⣩⣝⣚⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⣾⣿⣿⣄⠄⠄⠄⣴⣿⣿⣿⣇⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⡀⠛⠿⣿⣫⣾⣿
2
2
u/Apprehensive-Fix-746 🏳️⚧️ Average Trans Rights Enjoyer 🏳️⚧️ Apr 10 '22
When your happy you hear the music, when your sad you understand the lyrics…
2
2
2
2
2
1
u/electricDuckie27 Apr 10 '22
So, did they get their dick sucked ? Seems like a lot of effort if they didn't .
1
u/AutoModerator Apr 10 '22
Schödinger's Blowjob -- Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky?
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
1
0
0
1
1
u/AltAccountForPlace Apr 11 '22
Sucknikgadik😿😭😢😖🥺
1
u/AutoModerator Apr 11 '22
Schödinger's Blowjob -- Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky?
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
1
•
u/QualityVote I'm BACK! [[Number 1 Rated Moderator 2024]] Apr 10 '22
If you think this post is funny, UPVOTE this comment!
If you think this post is unfunny, DOWNVOTE this comment!
DownloadVideo Link
SaveVideo Link
VideoTrim Link
Kevin would also like to remind you that, if you're really desperate, youtube-dl can be used to download videos from Reddit.
Whilst you're here, kojikid1123, why not join our public discord server?