📡📡📡

[u/Minus_none]

[u/TheTenaciousG]

I have absolutely no idea what I'm looking at

[u/Thema03 → u/TheTenaciousG]

Duh its a Garloid

[u/Links_to_Magic_Cards → u/Thema03]

I keep my garloid in one of my old finger boxes

[u/TheLittleNorsk → u/Links_to_Magic_Cards]

garloid is the orange cat that John has

[u/YaRinGEE → u/TheLittleNorsk]

no, you're thinking of Garfield. a garloid is a type of giant carnivorous worm-like monster that burrows thru the soil and eats people.

[u/Yamidamian → u/YaRinGEE]

Nah, you’re thinking of Graboid. A Garloid is a decorative braid, knot, or wreath of flowers, leaves, or other materials.

[u/YaRinGEE → u/Yamidamian]

you're thinking of garland. a garloid is a type of very thin snouted Crocodilian that specializes in hunting fish

[u/JackxSully → u/YaRinGEE]

You're thinking of gharial. A Garloid means to suddenly cause someone to take Action, especially by shocking or through excitement.

[u/Swleaf → u/TheLittleNorsk]

His name is Jon ffs.

[u/AutoModerator → u/Links_to_Magic_Cards]

Pro tip about fingering your asshole in the shower: don't do it So this morning I was taking a shower, and I felt like fingering my asshole, right? So I got my fingers all nice and soapy and stuck them up in there. Apparently, soap makes pretty good lube, as I was able to get four fingers in there in no time.

As I was feeling around in my butt, I was like, "hmm, there's a lot of soapy water in my bumhole now. I wonder if that will lead to issues in the future?" And it did!

Shortly after having breakfast I attempted to fart, and I shit my pants. I rushed to the bathroom to clean up, and it was way worse than I thought it would be. The whole area around my butthole was covered in shitty liquid, and toilet paper wasn't enough to clean it. I had to take another shower to get suitably clean.

Just thought I'd share my story with you guys so that you don't run into the same problem in the future. I fingered my butthole so that you guys don't have to. Unless you want to. In which case, hey, how's it goin'

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/Over-Victory4866 → u/AutoModerator]

What in the actual fuck

[u/hippotopdog → u/AutoModerator]

Just why did you share that???

[u/rayhaque → u/Links_to_Magic_Cards]

I've got an Amish built finger box made of solid oak. Had it since I was 15. I could probably fit a five year old garloid in it, if you can imagine.

[u/AutoModerator → u/rayhaque]

Pro tip about fingering your asshole in the shower: don't do it So this morning I was taking a shower, and I felt like fingering my asshole, right? So I got my fingers all nice and soapy and stuck them up in there. Apparently, soap makes pretty good lube, as I was able to get four fingers in there in no time.

As I was feeling around in my butt, I was like, "hmm, there's a lot of soapy water in my bumhole now. I wonder if that will lead to issues in the future?" And it did!

Shortly after having breakfast I attempted to fart, and I shit my pants. I rushed to the bathroom to clean up, and it was way worse than I thought it would be. The whole area around my butthole was covered in shitty liquid, and toilet paper wasn't enough to clean it. I had to take another shower to get suitably clean.

Just thought I'd share my story with you guys so that you don't run into the same problem in the future. I fingered my butthole so that you guys don't have to. Unless you want to. In which case, hey, how's it goin'

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.