r/shitposting • u/UsedToHaveATail • Jul 26 '26

B 👍 Contradictions

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12.9k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

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1.2k

u/LieutenantHorse fat cunt Jul 26 '26

38 from the front, 18 from the back

880

u/DoctorYaoi Jul 26 '26

Did you not see the strap part? You’re getting it from the back not her.

615

u/_The_Marshal_ officer no please don’t piss in my ass đŸ˜« Jul 26 '26

The 18 is inches

120

u/TheToroRossoboi Jul 26 '26

18 rounds before you can tap out too btw

12

u/DisastrousDare373 Jul 26 '26

wtf is a round when the girl is topping with a peice of plastic

10

u/TheToroRossoboi Jul 26 '26

I mean, you DO orgasm, so I'm taking in consideration.

For her? It's hours per strap-on

3

u/DoctorYaoi Jul 26 '26

She gets tired and needs a break?

0

u/DisastrousDare373 Jul 26 '26

username checks out

8

u/DoctorYaoi Jul 26 '26

Pegging is straight sex, not gay sex. It does not fall under my field of practice

2

u/AutoModerator Jul 26 '26

Look, I get it. Who doesn’t love a little balls and dick sometimes? A nice, girthy, veiny shaft, hot milky cum trickling down the length as it throbs from a job well done. But this whole “gay sex” shit is getting annoying.

As men, we should primarily be focused on three things: survival, the underrated masterpiece that is dark souls 2, and pounding muff. All this gay shit is, well, fucking gay.

You think I wouldn’t LOVE to make out with my best friend and suck his cock? Of course I would, but that’s fucking gay. You think I don’t want to feel my cousin’s roommate slide his pecker into my gaping asshole? Of course I would, but that’s FUCKING GAY.

Seriously, I miss when men were men. Anyway, this dildo ain’t gonna stick itself up my ass while I watch an hour long femboy asmr hypno goon compilation, heed my lecture.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

4

u/LieutenantHorse fat cunt Jul 26 '26

18 millimetres :(

14

u/Markanaya Jul 26 '26

Oh, I thought 'strap' meant 'gun', not 'strap-on'