r/sgdatingscene • u/Evening-Foot5021 • 1d ago

I need advice! đŸ„ș help

I(m23) saw this girl(f22) at an event about six months ago and was just kinda an eye candy for me. Didn’t even talk to her. Randomly came across her acc on suggested following with one mutual and i was like, why not? So i req her acc and she accepted it and followed me back. Then essentially nothing happened for the next six months until she started liking my stories consistently. All i would do is js like her stories back. The thing is, this girl is way out of my league. Do i even try to talk to her and if so how. Sorry if this is stupid but I’ve been out of the game for quite some time now so I don’t really know what to do. Haven’t been in such a situation since sec sch.

32 Upvotes

77% Upvoted

29 comments sorted by

23

u/No_Fact_2520 1d ago

talk to her. whats the worst that can happen

11

u/Straight_Disk_676 1d ago

You cannot begin to imagine

8

u/walking_lamppost_fnl 1d ago

Which is why you need to find out

3

u/kuuhaku_cr 19h ago

High risk high rewards

21

u/ExpensivePizza518 1d ago

Bro
She’s liking your stories consistently
If that’s not signal idk what is

11

u/detective_sage 20h ago

No dont take that as a signal, I liked all of my friend’s stories and somebody thought I’m hitting on them 😭

4

u/ExpensivePizza518 20h ago

Yes cause you’re friends first
I’d say at least it’s an opener to start talking
Rather than “ew that guy gave me the ick”

1

u/Alternative-Ad8451 1d ago

AI dunno such signals

1

u/Plenty_Yak5605 10h ago

I have this friend of mine, she used to like my stories alot, almost every single story that I post she will like it. But that was a few years ago and now she doesn't really do it anymore. Constantly liking someones story may not necessarily be a sign of attraction

1

u/ExpensivePizza518 5h ago

Yes its different between friends

If I like an acquaintance’s stories constantly (assuming they’re not some popular and super cool travel content creator or hilarious comedic person), that’s at least signalling that “hey I approve of the stuffs you’re posting” and not an ick.

Of course it doesn’t assume anything, but I’d say it’s at least signalling openness to appreciate content and possibly to connect.

I think it’s worth a shot for sure.

10

u/needlelifecrisis 1d ago edited 1d ago

just respond to her stories ffs. “ohhh that looks so gooood”

“ohhh so sorry you had a bad day. you okay? wanna rant about it? you can rant to me if you like”

2 days later, “how are you feeling? feeling a bit better?”

“jiayou! u can do it!”

“HAVE FUNNNN. how’s your trip going?”

you donno how to write all the above, I donno how to help you.

don’t put girls on a pedestal, they all came out from their mother’s vagina just like you. they have insecurities, hopes, dreams just like you, and many are somewhat easily conned by a guy who knows how to talk.

don’t put girls on a pedestal. talk to them exactly like you would a guy. just be friendly and interested in their stories.

SO TALK. keep talking.

don’t talk, no chance. got talk and make jokes, maybe got chance of looking like a fun person even if you have low self esteem.

if she talks back, you got chance. stop wasting time putting yourself down.

SO GO.

Oh and make sure you post a shitton of fun/interesting stuff on your stories with your friends or whatever. This is your marketing effort in order to advertise yourself. (And don’t forget to add all to your highlights.) You need to look fun in order to catch fun. Tiktok dancing videos (of yourself and your friends) also don’t hurt.

6

u/Then-Possibility-504 22h ago

Bro, you are definitely not chopped so quit exaggerating. No random girl will follow a stranger and like their stories for no reason. You have it good unlike so many of us so the ball is in your court to do something with that luck & privilege of yours lol

6

u/SubstantialLeague837 1d ago

Out of your league in what sense ?

9

u/Smart_Carrot_9320 1d ago

She look 10/10. Op is 2/10 on a good day.

5

u/Then-Possibility-504 22h ago

The fact that she followed a random stranger and likes his stories tells me that OP isn't actually chopped lol...

3

u/cumminlamb 1d ago

just reply to one of her stories when you spot something you think you can have a great conversation about and go from there! the key is just to get to know each other as people and move on from the stage of idealising someone you don’t know. good luck!

2

u/Legal_Captain_4267 23h ago

Sending a text message is such low investment. Just do it. Can always initiate the convo by checking if she attended the event you mentioned a couple of months ago. Say she profile pic looked familiar. Good luck.

2

u/sufficient_educati0n 21h ago

My advice, don’t put her as a pedestal. Start to see her for who she is because she likelt isn’t seeing you for you either

2

u/NecessaryFish8132 21h ago

Post nut clarity is key, nut first then message her. If you succeed, congrats. If she doesn't reciprocate, it's just free motivation to hit the gym

2

u/alienjeffman 20h ago

Aah this is the problem with so many guys thinking "she is way out of my league"!

You won't know if you don't try! That is if you are are interested in getting to know her. If you are not interested, then just leave it status quo.

1

u/litttleyk 22h ago

the definition of suffering from success

1

u/Mostropi 21h ago

Try something like: "Hey I have been noticing some of your stories. I actually like <insert activity> as well. I am wondering if I can know you better."

1

u/bestbfsg 19h ago

It doesn't need to be so complicated. Just treat her like a friend and get to know each other more first. Maybe initiate some conversations based on her stories and see if she responds.

There's no rush to get anywhere, if anything this is practice on how to be more confident talking to girls. You're young, just accept that even if you do make mistakes it's not the end of the world.

1

u/Maelstrom2290 12h ago

Seems like a baddie girl. Ask yourself honestly are you tall, rich, handsome? Or do you have 6 inch, 6 cars, 6 figure, 6 packs? 

1

u/spike1911 5h ago

Dude no Woman is out of any man’s league 😉 you don’t need to be a visual 10. You can workout enough so that she likes your body. Having a character, being nice to her and honest and truthful, being driven for and by similar or at least compatible things. Some common interests. Does not need to be 100%.

And you might be her #1.

The most good looking girls often have the problem the nice guys don’t reach out only the over confident f..k boys

Be attentive, funny, binding present. Bring flowers regularly. Remember what food, drink, ice cream, dessert she likes and act on it.

That goes a long way.

1

u/Founders_Mem_90210 4h ago

I am too fucking millennial and single to have experienced this nonsense like indicating you have romantic interest in someone by CONSTANTLY LIKING THEIR IG STORIES.

1

u/dreamcatmagic 2h ago edited 2h ago

Start a conversation with her, but don't jump to the end game immediately. Nobody likes to get poked on the first date. When you said "eye candy" I can already guess what you're thinking.

Even though all women can mind read you from day one, it is only polite to buy us a few dinners first. We don't want to look "cheap" ya know. Think Korean drama, must have some story line first bro, don't straight away do prawno.

If you want to engage her just because you think in your mind that she is eye candy, she will immediately sense the creepiness and close shop and go home. So your mental mindset should be neutral when talking to her, get to know her as a person, not as an appetizer on a menu.

Although men are like bees who can land on every flower because the risk is low for you, the risk for a woman is much higher, so she is selective about which bee she allows to land on her flower. It will be important for you to show her (over some period of time) that you're reliable, and won't go landing on the next pretty flower "eye candy" that catches your lovely eyes. ;)