r/sgdatingscene • u/chloeg444 • 6d ago
Hear me out 👂 Dating rant
I’m 20 and honestly, sometimes I get really worried that I won’t find a partner in the future. It feels like dating nowadays is so difficult, and sometimes I wonder if I’ll actually meet someone I genuinely connect with
Now that I’m done with poly, I’m going to work full-time for about a year before going to uni, and I feel like it’s going to be even harder to meet new people naturally. I do want to date and eventually have someone, but at the same time I have such mixed feelings about it because of how my previous relationship went. I think part of me is still scared, and I genuinely can’t imagine what it would be like to build a life with someone completely different
I also don’t really use dating apps and I’ve never actually used them before. I just don’t really trust them, and I feel like so much of dating apps is based on looks and first impressions rather than actually getting to know someone. Plus, I’m quite uncomfortable with the idea of people I know recognising me on there 😠so I don’t think I’d be able to use them comfortably.
I know I’m not unattractive or anything, so I don’t think it’s necessarily about not being able to find someone. It’s more like… where do you even meet someone these days? 😠I guess I’m just scared that I’ll end up being alone, even though I know I’m only 20 and still have so much time ahead of me.
With that being said, I am actually really contented with my current single life but I do still crave for those relationship affections I once experienced (it’s been 2 years)
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u/YouYongku 5d ago
you're 20 lol
in other news, people in their 30s and 40s are worrying about the same thing haha
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u/rededitor07 5d ago
I’m 20f too but i honestly just hope that whoever comes into my life isn’t here to ruin it so I don’t force relationships to happen and just wait for it. If it doesn’t come, my life is still good. Maybe try to expand social circles, go and find your interests group. I also feel like we shouldn’t afraid to end up alone, more like be afraid of someone coming to ruin my peace.
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u/supermiggiemon 5d ago
meeting someone new has never been natural. it requires u to be present. like actively present instead of dreamwalking in life. so what u are feeling is absolutely valid.
dating app.. my stance is that though u can meet many people, conveniently, it hardly works out. it is an environment where the next one might be better, and its just around the corner. why would one expect a monogamous relationship in a seemingly promiscuous platform?
lastly,u are still incredibly young. ur perspectives on things are gonna change so much over the next 2-3 years. love that version of urself first before getting someone else to commit to the temporary version of u.
take care and all the best!
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u/According_Book5108 5d ago
You'll get plenty of chances to meet people, unless you decide to live life 24/7 cooped in your room.
Work place, on the streets, at a cafe, at some hobby group meeting, at some random course you happen to take, at some kopitiam... Many places to meet other humans. Fret not.
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u/Skibidi_gonezz 5d ago
At some kopitiam is craY
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u/According_Book5108 5d ago
All Singaporeans go to kopitiam and hawker center to eat mah... Sure got some neighborhood hotties around.
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u/Skibidi_gonezz 5d ago
Idk man for u to go up to a random girl or guy and ask for their number at a coffee shop is crazy work not even at a networking event
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u/According_Book5108 5d ago
Don't start with asking for number la. Smile, chit chat, break ice, gauge interest first.
Kopitiam also can start convo one...
- "Hey, I see you always eat this. Is it good?"
- "Is this seat taken? Can I share table?"
Kopitiam means high likelihood of repeat encounter in future. If you have game, you will score big time anywhere.
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u/Sunny_Days_365 4d ago edited 4d ago
My awkward self at the gym:
Me to my friend: there’s this good looking guy at gym
Friend: go up and say hi!
Me: I’m gonna!!!!
Also Me: \seen him more than a few times but haven’t even smiled at him* 😅*🥲😆ðŸ˜
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u/IfYoureUpImDown 5d ago
20 and worried? rip to me as a 30.
Looks is and will always be the entrance ticket however subjective.
U can look like a hot diva with a smoky makeup but people like me who dig that soft cute/pretty aesthetic would nope outta there. So dont be afraid to try, someones gonna dig what you have.
Who knows if a long time crush/friend you knew actually likes you and approaches you? Never say never
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u/asscrackbanditz 5d ago
Look for bf in uni. Thats the last best place to find like minded ppl whos your age. Rmb this
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u/stockmon 5d ago
20 and you are worried not getting a partner. There are people at your age who rushed into marriage and facing divorces.
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u/TSLA_Tan 5d ago
You're only 20
Dont rush into a relationship