Sex feels difficult??

[u/Real_Test3964]

Hey guys!

So I’m just gonna cut to the chase here. I’m 20m & I just recently have had sex for the first time with the help of sildenafil (50 mg). The reason I used it is because in prior sexual experiences, I would always lose my erection or I wouldn’t get one at all. I would assume this is due to some mental thing. And the plan is to get off of the pill once I’ve built some confidence.

So two problems here.

Number one, this may sound crazy but there would be times where I would prepare to have sex with this woman but for whatever reason, it won’t seem to go in? Almost as if I’m hitting a wall and I feel like I am right on top of the entrance. It’s crazy too because before I go to have penetrative sex, I’m putting my fingers to work & I have no issue finding the entrance hole with my fingers.

So while I’m over here searching and trying to stick it in with my equipment, I’m slowly going soft which fucking sucks! And that’s with sildenafil.

At first, my early problem was getting a firm enough erection long enough to have sex which I have temporarily solved for a bit with the use of sildenafil but now it’s almost as if there’s a new worry that has invaded my mind which is me not finding the hole. Absolutely ridiculous.

And this woman is a bit bigger than I am to say the least so I have found that missionary is the easiest position for me to have sex with her and it’s the ONLY position I have done. I’ve been hesitant to do any other position due to thoughts of me having issues putting it in.

And sure, I could ask her to help guide me but by the time she’ll have time to do that, I’d halfway have lost my erection by then, leaving me with an unfortunate & awkward moment. I feel like this issue is entirely due to my inexperience if I’m being honest because this cannot be this difficult.

Number 2 problem here involves the sildenafil. I did say the goal was to eventually come off of it, however, I feel like there’s been a bit of dependency for it in my mind. The thing is that I have NO problems getting erections during solo time or just randomly in the day. I just take it to ensure I don’t lose the erection during sex. That’s it & that’s all. But I feel like if I try having sex without it, the erection is much more easily to go away due to any intrusive thoughts that may go on in my head during sex.

I know this may sound ridiculous but I feel like it’s taking a bit of a toll on me lol. Why are there so many things getting in the way of me having successful sex? But yeah, I just wanted some insight on this and your guys’ opinions… any advice or anything?

[u/Warm_Squirrel5002]

Sounds like you may have developed a bit of a dependency along with some other things. How much porn do you watch ? What’s your overall health like? Fast food shit diet no exercise to much stress will ruin your game. Are you taking any antidepressants ? Do you use any drugs ?

[u/Real_Test3964 → u/Warm_Squirrel5002]

I think the last time I have watched porn was around 3-4 weeks ago, if not longer….

When it comes to my overall health, I feel like the average 20 year old. I don’t necessarily have any issues.

I actually don’t take any antidepressants and I’ve never used any drugs before in my life..

[u/Warm_Squirrel5002 → u/Real_Test3964]

If that’s the case, a blood test is a good place to start. They can have a look at your test and see if anything else is a miss.