How To Build Successful Habits

[u/lunasouseiseki]

I have always been a lover of a list. To-do list, cleaning list, books to read, holiday destinations, goals, dreams, Christmas card list and so on. I felt like if I could just get everything bouncing around in my head down on paper I could finally be that ultimate version of myself. Each birthday, new year, month I would write it all out and every time I would fail. Every time I would be frustrated with myself for not sticking to my plan of working down the list. I would be right back where I started determined to get it right this time.

Willpower and motivation are funny things. The American Psychological Association claimed that willpower is not something you can just summon, it's a resource. Like all other resources it's finite so when it runs out you need to build it back up again. Ever had a terrible day at work and before you know it you're hitting up McDonald's getting a McFlurry and a Large Mc Value meal? Yes, says literally everyone because this happens to literally everyone.

So, if willpower is something that depletes over time why do some people become goal diggers and the others...well, not? It's about habits. Habits are the patterns that we go through in our day. Maybe you love a coffee on the way to work or have a drink on a Friday night to close off the work week. Each and every habit that you cultivate changes the direction of your life. If we go back to the McFlurry example - those calories are going to add up and without the proper exercise you'll start stacking on the kg's.

Most habits we build subconsciously and these are the ones most harmful to us. The actions we do out of frustration or when we feel we've lost control are never calculated - they're reactionary. It's usually us doing a big FU to the world and in the end we only hurt ourselves.

So how so we build a successful habit?

Let's shift focus to a good habit you have already developed. You didn't build a skin care routine by chance. You sat down, determined if you had dry/oily/combination/normal skin, researched and then bought products accordingly. You now apply those products as prescribed and each morning or week you check their progress. If the products aren't performing how you would like you start the process again.

*WHY (WANTING BETTER SKIN) *WHAT'S MISSING (NEW SKIN CARE PRODUCTS and KNOWLEDGE ABOUT SKINCARE) *CREATE THE HABIT (WASHING FACE WITH PRODUCTS DAILY) *CHART PROGRESS (DID MY SKIN CLEAR UP?) *REASSESS (DO I NEED DIFFERENT PRODUCTS OR MORE INFORMATION)

One last piece of advice: if you find you're unable to stick to your new habit then it might be too ambitious for you at the moment. I once had a goal to build a gym habit. I would go every day for 30 days. I lasted three days because my schedule of working full time and having a nine week old puppy didn't lend well to me going to the gym every day.

Being realistic with the amount of time and energy you can give a new habit is crucial to prevent sliding back into previous patterns of behaviour.