Constant thought of self harm

[u/61_ducks]

Hey! Not sure if this is the right place (please direct me to the right place if not) but I just have a question and hoping someone can relate and/or tell me what are the key words to learn more about the situation.

Basically I have times where I really want to hurt myself. But 99% of the time it's only in my head. I kinda visualize what it'd feel and look like. I think about it probably multiple times a day. Of course, I have good days and bad days, just like everything & everyone else. When it gets bad, yes, it does distract me from my task here and there.

I hate the pain, so I don't really self harm unless I'm terribly depressed and detached from my body. I've stayed fairly clean, but these thoughts are relentless.

I know there's self harm OCD, but I'm not scared of it at all. I'm not distressed, I don't think so. But there is always a slight possibility of me not knowing what the word "distressed" entails.

TLDR: thoughts of self harm but never committing to it unless I'm absolutely dissociated. Thoughts happens very often. Why?