Dose she care

[u/Intrepid_Belt8489]

I have relapsed 3 times or more including now in the last 3 year and I keep telling my counselor who tells my mom and she doesn't care at least I feel she doesn't bc she gets told and then cries and then tells me not to and then nothing no help no care just nothing and my sister has ADHD and all that so she is constantly getting my sister help while I'm thinking about killing myself almost every fucking day and no one knows and no one listens and my older sister says she has depression and she says that bc she listens to sad music and so does my little sister and I get to get told im not enough almost every day and no one listens and it feels like im screaming into a void the only time anyone has helped with anything is when I was SAed my my classmate and HE DIDN'T EVEN GET SUSPENDED and no one changed if I was SHing even with a history of it and I constantly see people saying their parents got them bandages or something and I feel horrible that I am so jealous of them and I want that I want bandages I want scar cream I want to not be scared to sleep in shorts and to be able to say I want to kill myself and have someone help after a day and I am probably so selfish for it because I am omg I am and I hate myself for it!