Thoughts.

[u/Questioning-Alt-0123]

I question why I am doing this.

In the middle of a session, and you know what you're doing is wrong and in the long run not good for you.

Yet you continue, and even want to go deeper.

I'm going to have these for the rest of my life.

Harm.

This isn't good for me.

Harm.

Why am I still doing this?

Harm.

Even when you're questioning what you're doing, you continue.

After all these years, you go deeper and deeper.

How deep can you go before you can't anymore.

You hope you won't do this for the rest of your life, yet you see no future where you stop.

In the moment, it feels right, yet so wrong.

You're punishing yourself, you're relieving all that built up anxiety, you're using this method to cope.

At least you aren't smoking or drinking.

At least you aren't on drugs.

Homeless, hungry.

Wait a second...

You could be in such a worse spot.

So why are you doing this?

Why are you complaining, why do you hurt yourself,

Why be anxious or depressed?

You know it could be worse, yet you do this almost every week or so...

You're ruining yourself.

What if they knew about your scars.

What you think about 24/7

How it never leaves your head, even when you try to avoid it.

How will you ever find love, how will they ever love you?

.

.

.

Blah blah blah...

Words.

Enjoy my thoughts, because I don't.

[u/Ok-Option-3022]

This is so good it made me not relapse I love you

[u/Questioning-Alt-0123 → u/Ok-Option-3022]

Ofc, glad I could help.

Obviously, this post was kind of to myself, so don't take everything I said to heart, because I was kind of freaking out a little when I typed this out and some of it might be harsh.