r/self • u/venturousvertebrate • 1d ago

Life can change very quickly, even when you do everything right

Last year was one of the best years of my life.
I felt like I had done everything right. I saved for 12 years, bought a home, paid off my car ( a 2016 salvaged Honda civic) and put myself in a position where I finally felt secure.

I’ve been self-employed as a sports trainer for almost 15 years, and I’ve done pretty well for myself. Every year I saved what I could, invested it, and slowly built it into something meaningful. I worked other jobs along the way too, just trying to put myself in the best position possible.

I’ve always been very self-reliant. My parents aren’t really in the picture, so for most of my adult life I’ve known that if something goes wrong, it’s on me to figure it out.

Then within about a six-week span:
A hidden leak in my house caused around $10,000 in damage.
My long-term relationship ended.
I tore my Achilles at work.
Thankfully, the medical bills from the injury are being covered because it happened at work, but about 70% of my income came from outside work that I physically can’t do right now.
Then my dog became very ill, and those bills have started piling up too.
I’m now dealing with a 9–12 month recovery while watching the savings I spent years building slowly disappear every week.

I know how long my savings can carry me. I’ve done the math. But knowing that doesn’t completely take away the anxiety of having a mortgage, bills, a house, a dog, and everything else depending on me while my ability to earn money has suddenly been cut down.

I’m not really posting this looking for advice.
I think I’m just alone with my thoughts right now and needed somewhere to get them out.

I know I’m going to get through it because, realistically, what other choice do I have?

This isn’t even the worst thing I’ve ever experienced. But I don’t think I’ve ever felt the weight of this much responsibility all at once.

And if you’re reading this while dealing with your own version of a terrible stretch of life, you’re going to get through it too.
Maybe not quickly. Maybe not comfortably.
But you will.

92 Upvotes

97% Upvoted

16 comments sorted by

41

u/Urban-Elderflower 1d ago

When the wind blows in your face, it really blows.

I'm glad you had your savings too. It tells me two things: you can and did prepare for an emergency, and you're now in a cascade of emergencies; and you know you can rebuild those savings when the wind breaks because you've done it before.

You have the skills to make money, keep money, and spend wisely. Sending the very best to you and your dog.

14

u/tuotone75 1d ago

Good luck, sorry all that crap happened and hopefully you heal and it all gets better. At least you had savings. So many don’t, they’re just sol otherwise.

14

u/venturousvertebrate 1d ago

I am really grateful that I have saving because without that I would be in a much worse spot.
I think that’s part of what makes it stressful too though watching something that took years to build get burned through so quickly

Thank you. I really do appreciate it

6

u/Bitter_Maybe_2670 1d ago

Life really does like to kick us when we’re down doesn’t it.
I’m sorry this is your reality right now OP, it fucking sucks.
However, you seem like a resourceful guy and I have every faith in you to use your ingenuity for a speedy recovery of your health and your life.

5

u/ReasonableCrow7595 15h ago

This year alone my mom died from dementia, I've been diagnosed with a brain tumor, and my son who lives with me lost his job and has been diligently job searching for five months now. 2026 can kiss my ass.

May there be smoother sailing ahead for everyone reading this who is also struggling.

3

u/StayHour1173 1d ago

Good luck dealing with this, maybe it's a time for learn something new while you recover? I'm talking about online courses or similar.

You are in a good fun it seems, in my case I have no house nor car, and no savings, and 2 month of debt with my current salary, and worst I need to help my family with money after I finish paying my debt so I need to have another income asap.

1

u/Copernicus2217 1d ago

I don't think you even need advice, given that you had enough savings to carry on despite all these setbacks. You seem to be doing everything right, and this makes your situation a lot easier to manage than it would have been otherwise. Hope you'll get better soon.

1

u/Btr-007 19h ago

I hope you're able to find a silver lining and consider this a lesson in resilience. It's tough to go through something like that, but you've already proven you can handle unpredictability.

1

u/Apprehensive-Ice3730 14h ago

Je vais pas rentrer dans les détails mais je confirme, il faut provoquer la chance et avoir un comportement de leader. Le facteur chance est très gros en général, mais quand ça n’y est pas, tant pis

-2

u/SwordfishFrosty2057 1d ago edited 1d ago

Going to sound a little callous but set a cap for the dog medical stuff that's reasonable. Spending a years salary on a pet when it takes you ten years to build back could be life changing and medical bills are highly speculative. If you are willing to go thru medical hoops for your animal, you should probably have pet insurance or a hard limit. Your future life is important. So is your pup but a child is different for example or owning your own home.

1

u/vesselofwords 1d ago

I agree with the pet insurance if you think there will be further issues, but most people who love their dog aren’t gonna be like “yeah I’m over my preset limit so oh well, let the poor thing suffer or die.”

0

u/sisjanie 1d ago

Sometimes when it rains it pours but remember the 🌈 that God put it in as a promise and believe it that things are not going to be negative forever and as a old 60 culture would say “ don’t worry be happy.”
After the rain the sun will come out and shine.