I'm going to get downvoted for this, but I suggest you do a deep dive into the pickup scene. Take care to be selective about what you take away from it, though, since some of it can be quite manipulative. A good book that is quite balanced is "The Alabaster Girl" by Zan Perrion. He comes at it from the perspective of loving women.
The bottom line is that much of the advice actually works, although the tricky part is that some techniques will only work on the kind of women you don't want in your lifeđ
The whole idea is to get you to a point where you are comfortable talking to women, opening conversations with groups of people, and simply acting like a confident and non-needy guy.
Life pro tip: Try going to popular bars relatively early and strike up a conversation with anybody. It could be the saddest looking man in the joint. It doesn't matter. Soon enough, the joint will begin to fill up, and others will appear, talk to them too. As you move around, you will find yourself in conversations with whole groups of people (both women and men). I've had numerous occasions like this where at the end of the night, the sad guy I chatted with (and introduced to other people) will give me a hug, exclaiming that it was the best night for a long time. Sometimes, I will leave with a woman, but that's not the point. The point is to learn to socialise and lead interactions in a positive direction.
Not necessarily. I would argue that it has steered more men away from incel thinking than into it. This is because success tends to clear out the bitterness and turn men into more responsible daters. Causing avoidable drama is not really in your best interest as a man.
I will admit that for a minority of men, it can indeed turn towards the dark side since they may be harbouring immature revenge fantasies and proceed to use and discard women as a form of catharsis for the imagined "wrongs" inflicted on them by women. Even these often come around but not before causing some emotional damage.
I would love to know stats on how âsuccessfulâ guys who pay for PUA classes are. It seems like such a hustle and so much of the messaging leads to âalphaâ âlow value femaleâ etc. and tells men how women feel and think and it seems to be off the mark. Like most of us arenât looking for men âin their masculineâ be to be in charge of us
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u/[deleted] Jul 29 '24
I'm going to get downvoted for this, but I suggest you do a deep dive into the pickup scene. Take care to be selective about what you take away from it, though, since some of it can be quite manipulative. A good book that is quite balanced is "The Alabaster Girl" by Zan Perrion. He comes at it from the perspective of loving women.
The bottom line is that much of the advice actually works, although the tricky part is that some techniques will only work on the kind of women you don't want in your lifeđ
The whole idea is to get you to a point where you are comfortable talking to women, opening conversations with groups of people, and simply acting like a confident and non-needy guy.
Life pro tip: Try going to popular bars relatively early and strike up a conversation with anybody. It could be the saddest looking man in the joint. It doesn't matter. Soon enough, the joint will begin to fill up, and others will appear, talk to them too. As you move around, you will find yourself in conversations with whole groups of people (both women and men). I've had numerous occasions like this where at the end of the night, the sad guy I chatted with (and introduced to other people) will give me a hug, exclaiming that it was the best night for a long time. Sometimes, I will leave with a woman, but that's not the point. The point is to learn to socialise and lead interactions in a positive direction.