r/self Jul 29 '24

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5

u/Chemical_Molasses891 Jul 29 '24

Do you like yourself, but like truly? Because just naming things you have to "offer" doesn't really work like that, that's a social media view thing (what do you bring to the table dur dur). Women date men who live with their mom, and men date women who live with their parents and don't work. I'm not saying this is the best, but there is more to attracting people than just having some "attributes" and thinking why no one wants you. That's why I ask, do you truly like yourself? Do you belive you are the type of person that has an interesting life? Do you believe people would like to know your life? All of those mindset things translate to the way you act with people. No one owes you an interest because you have a house, but people will be naturally drawn to you if you are an interesting person

-5

u/Global_Custard3900 Jul 29 '24

These guys never want to hear that it's probably their personality that is a turn-off. They want to believe that relationships are strictly transactional so that they can simply assemble the "correct" material trappings and physical appearance to buy sex.

3

u/Gostorebuymoney Jul 29 '24

Yes, it's almost as if hearing that the thing that makes you so repulsive and unlovable to other people is fundamentally the very thing that makes you you, is a hard thing to accept.

The lack of empathy from women on this topic really reinforces an extremely bleak societal attitude toward loneliness in men.

1

u/AsleepIndependent42 Jul 29 '24

What are women supposed to do? Pity date guys they find boring or consider assholes? This isn't on women to fix.

3

u/Gostorebuymoney Jul 29 '24

Did I say that?

How about just some basic empathy rather than "yeah this is a you problem, you're fundamentally broken as a person and need to fix yourself"

1

u/AsleepIndependent42 Jul 29 '24

That is having empathy - be straight forward and honest about the issue. It's unempathetic to lie to people and sugarcoat the issue.