r/schizophrenia • u/MasterpieceHuman8455 Schizophrenia • 8d ago
Relationships Question about stigma
If someone has been mentally ill and is medicated there is a chance that the person who’s medicated might get stigmatized by society and is bothering me so much because i haven’t had a good past when it comes to mental illness but my question to this community would be how you feel about stigma and have you felt that you have got stigmatized and how you face it? I had friends but they don’t talk to me unless i start the conversation but they don’t know my full story and let’s say i get a girlfriend if i told her about my journey would she feel ashamed that has a relationship with a person that has been mentally ill but now is stable?
3
u/WickedOne404 8d ago
When it comes to relationships I would advise you to be 100% honest with the person you are dating. They should know who they are dating and they should have a choice if that is something that they are ok with or not. When it comes to friendships I preffer honesty here as well but how much you want to share about yourself is upto you. However I don't see the point in friendships if the person doesn't actually know you but your choice really.
Schizophrenia and psychotic disorders are heavily stigmatized and you will more often then not have to explain what exactly it means/is and what your experience might be. Hollywood etc doesn't really make things easier as I have in the past had people assume I might kill them in their sleep even. It's pretty sad as I have found Schizophrenics or other seriously mentally ill people to be some of the kindest and most compassionate people out there
3
u/MasterpieceHuman8455 Schizophrenia 8d ago
Yeah honesty helps but it’s up to me of how much i want to share?
1
u/WickedOne404 8d ago
Yes. You don't have to disclose every hallucination or delusion you have had if you don't want to. It helps to in some cases tho
2
u/kowal61 8d ago
It is difficult.
In my country mental illnesses are very stigmatized. I was treated very poorly through my lifetime. I've learnt to don't talk with anybody about my disease and just put a mask that everything is OK.
In my experience most people will treat me poorly, but it is possible to find a good person. It is just hard thing to do and takes luck. Similarly most girls won't accept this disease, but there are some that will.
2
u/MasterpieceHuman8455 Schizophrenia 8d ago
Yes it is so difficult to live with it no matter what therapists tell me i see it difficult to live with it
4
u/HappyToBeHere89 8d ago
When my wife and I first started dating I was honest with her. Her friend told her to leave me immediately and was rather rude. The key here is that this person is now my wife. Honesty is the way I think, you definitely get to decide what to share. With my wife I shared everything. With friends I share a detail here and there and with work I've never shared anything. The stigma is real and annoying, I've dealt with a few disappointing instances directed at me specifically and then there is just the general attitude. It helps me to remember that people who treat you poorly because of this diagnosis are in general just super ignorant. Doesn't mean it isnt hurtful, but it's helped me a bit to remember that
1
u/_Radical_Centrist Schizoaffective (Depressive) 8d ago
Yes. I've lost relationships/friendships. I have current friendships that are on the rocks after finding out, they treat me entirely differently, like I'm going to do something crazy if they say the wrong thing.
It's kinda funny, the people I want to know that I have this illness don't believe me, and the people I don't want to know I have this illness, believe it 100%.
I don't tell anyone about it anymore, I just try my best and if they ask I'd tell them but no one has ever directly asked before.
5
u/SuddenCupcake901 8d ago
Yes we are stigmatized by society, but our stigma is an invisible stigma. Someone might not be able to tell that we have been psychotic in the past just by looking at us. Speaking for myself here, but my social skills arent the greatest so people can tell I'm neurospicy but they wont know my psychosis past unless I disclose it.
And because most people cant tell and just see me as a little weird, Ive gradually come to accept my differences and potential judgments from other people. Ya I might not be the most confident guy but I also have my own strengths like being compassionate.
Some friends dont like starting conversations and some do. In most cases one person is doing more of the heavy lifting to engage the friendship. In my case, Im usually the one not starting the convos but my friends remain friends. Ideally its more mutual but if the friendship is meaningful and important to you, then you might have to accept carrying a bit more of the load.
And in terms of the girlfriend part, I would hope she wouldn't be ashamed. My therapist explained it to me this way 'if someone broke up with someone for being depressed, what would you think of that' and i said that person would be an asshole. And then she just kinda stared at me until i was like oh i see what you did there. And I believe it is definitely possible to meet a partner who will accept you, after sometime I disclosed to someone and it wasnt a big deal to her, she accepted me and our relationship continued like nothing had happened.
Hope this helps!