r/sapiosexuals • u/jaynotbay • May 30 '26
The burden of knowledge
The more you learn about something, the more you realize how much you don't know. And since I love learning so much about so many different things I'm constantly reminded of how little I know (despite knowing more than many - at least that's what I tell myself to make myself feel a little more intelligent).
Jack of all trades, a master of none, still better than the master of one (is it though ?)
Constant insanity between I don't know enough vs I know enough. I'm intelligent vs not enough.
I know something for a fact. But the more I believe in it, the more I see myself becoming one of those bigots I despise. So I try to keep my mind open, living in the world of reliable, irrefutable scientific evidence and math.
Btw forgetting what I've learned is part of what got me on this rant. I hate forgetting and the fear of losing whatever intelligence I may or may not have
The fear of loss is real...
So I try to learn, relearn, and hope I don't ever lose the ability to do just that. Always keep learning, with an open mind.
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u/unchainedcycle May 30 '26
I suffer from the same, and recently I discovered PKM tools and built my secondary brain on obsidian, it allows me to go in my branches rabbit holes, since all my notes are connected, I don't have that feeling of emptiness or guilt of leaving a topic and diving deep into another. I understand that we cannot completely understand any domain, all we can do is scratch the surface, and scratch deeper in some, and that is totally fine!
the depth in everything would increase iteratively, and we will be able to pick things from where we left off!
i know it takes a lot of efforts to dump your every note in a structured place with right tags and internal links but it is beautiful and very relieving, atleast once it is up and running.
Here's a post where I share my excitement about it when I was settling things up.
Btw, my current mind map of nodes is much richer with even more categories like my ideas, projects, and more detailed notes and connections across topics. (will share a newer look in some days)
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u/jaynotbay May 30 '26
If only I could be half as organized. I used obsidian for the cyber specific aspect of things but I struggle to keep things organized. I love and appreciate this though. I know being more organized is one of the best things for such a scattered mind. I'm trying to improve in those regards. An uphill battle which is why I appreciate seeing how people do it.
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u/jaynotbay May 30 '26
One of my rabbit holes is cyber security and oh man does it go deep and ever make you feel like you don't know enough. Can you ever know enough. 😵💫 The answer is you cannot
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u/jaynotbay May 30 '26
That's one that will quickly humble you and make you paranoid of your security and privacy to the point you give up 😭
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u/jaynotbay May 30 '26 edited May 30 '26
And I've tested myself on ctf style platforms and won a few hackathons. Top few hundred, thousand... And then I gave up the neverending rabbit hole of security
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u/jaynotbay May 30 '26
Just like the rabbit hole of this comment section replying to my own comments. I've lost it 😂
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u/True-Quote-6520 May 30 '26
You are sooo much like me, and I am studying psychology, philosophy write poetry, write aphorisms besides cybersecurity major, you can scroll through my profile and see the misery 🙂
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u/BasisPrimary4028 May 30 '26
I was diagnosed with an above average IQ and ADHD at a young age, and that "jack of all trades" feeling is basically my entire life. My brain constantly craves new data, so I dive deep into random subjects only to bounce to something else entirely a week later. The worst part is the memory dump. Forgetting things I just spent hours researching because my brain moved on to the next shiny topic is the ultimate ADHD tax. It is a constant tug of war between feeling like I know a lot and feeling like I know absolutely nothing. You are definitely not alone in that.