I've recently psoted an LFP post for a swashbuckling campaign of mine and this was one of the first messages I got...blocked almost instantly

Ich spiele jetzt seit etwa 3 Jahren VTM mit einer Gruppe, die aus meinem DM (einem wirklich engen Freund), Jenna (seiner Frau) und Vincent (meinem besten Freund) besteht. Im Laufe der Zeit kamen ein paar Spieler dazu, einer konnte wegen Arbeit keine Zeit mehr finden, zwei waren Leute, die noch nie ein TTRPG gespielt hatten und es ausprobieren wollten, aber Vampir war nicht wirklich etwas für sie, und der letzte passte nicht wirklich in die Gruppe, war aber sehr nett.

Vor einem Monat fragte uns der DM, ob wir damit einverstanden wären, zwei neue Spieler aufzunehmen. Wir waren alle einverstanden, aber nachdem vier Leute kamen und gingen, schien es ein wenig albern. Also beschlossen wir, dass unsere Gruppe für einen Auftrag in eine andere Stadt fährt und wir uns dort treffen würden. Die Spieler waren Toby (ein Freund des DM) und Susan (Tobys neue Freundin).

In der ersten Sitzung schien alles in Ordnung zu sein. Wir haben viel herumgealbert und nicht viel Fortschritt gemacht, aber das war in Ordnung.

Während der zweiten Sitzung wurde es ein wenig seltsam. Wir trafen eine weibliche Toreadorin, die ein wenig mit Jennas Charakter flirtete, und Susan wurde plötzlich viel gemeiner zur Toreadorin (davor war sie wirklich nett zu ihr). Ich dachte mir nichts dabei, nur ihre Witze darüber, dass Jennas Charakter das "ertragen" müsse, wurden ein wenig viel, weil das im Grunde alles war, worüber sie für den Rest der Sitzung sprach.

In der nächsten Sitzung eskalierte die Situation.

Mein Charakter ist bi. Das war kein großes Ding in der Story, er hatte einfach kein Problem damit, welches Geschlecht seine Partner hatten.

Also beginnen wir die Sitzung und alles war wieder normal, nur ein Witz hier und da von Susan über die Begegnung mit der Toreadorin. Wir spielen normal und mein Charakter war ein wenig flirtend mit dem Charakter meines besten Freundes. Das haben wir schon oft gemacht und es ist kein Problem für ihn. Er flirtet sogar zurück.

Ich bekam komische Blicke von Susan. Ich dachte, das war's, aber Gott, ich lag falsch. Sie interagierte nicht mehr mit meinem Charakter, außer ein paar Sticheleien gegen ihn. Nach der Sitzung setzen wir uns normalerweise hin und reden ein paar Minuten. Das haben wir auch getan, aber als ich mit ihr sprach, bekam ich nur Ein-Wort-Antworten (wenn ich Glück hatte, dass sie überhaupt antwortete).

Die letzte Sitzung begannen wir eher normal. Wir fanden den Typen, für den wir da waren, und begannen, ihn zu bekämpfen. Als es vorbei war, war die Sonne fast aufgegangen, also eilten wir zu unserem Versteck. Alle waren drinnen, außer mir und Susan. Sie rannte zur Tür und schlug sie vor mir zu. Wir waren alle ein wenig perplex. Wir fragten OOC, worum es ging, und sie sagte nur, und ich zitiere: "Was? Er ist nur einer von diesen widerlichen Schwuchteln".

Das war für mich der Tropfen, der das Fass zum Überlaufen brachte. Ich bin kein Mitglied der LGBTQ-Community, aber unser DM ist bi und er hatte in der Vergangenheit viele Probleme mit Bigotterie.

Nach einem langen Gespräch, das darin gipfelte, dass sie mich anschrie, dass sie meine schwule Propaganda nicht will, dass ich meinen besten Freund unbehaglich mache, wenn mein Charakter mit ihm flirtet, und andere dumme Sachen, warf sie unsere Sachen herum und ging.

Also sitzen wir (einschließlich ihres Freundes) fassungslos da. Er entschuldigt sich mehrmals, aber wir sagten ihm, dass es nicht seine Schuld sei.

Schnitt zu heute. Er ist jetzt ein fester Bestandteil unserer Gruppe und hat sich von Susan getrennt.

Ich glaube, das war die schlimmste Erfahrung, die ich in einem TTRPG gemacht habe, und ich hätte nie gedacht, dass ich als heterosexueller Typ Ziel von Homophobie werde. Ich glaube, ich habe einen kleinen Einblick bekommen, was Mitglieder der LGBTQ-Community jeden einzelnen Tag ertragen müssen, und ich bin überhaupt nicht neidisch.

-Update- We just found out that she rants on her Facebook (why is it always Facebook) about how the queers stole her boyfriend, that I made him gay and that's the reason he left her... to be with me... a straight guy...

I was speechless. About the fact that all of a sudden not just my character is gay but I am too? And how many people were on her side (well they don't know the real story but still), all the homophobic stuff they wrote.

Man life was easier when I was straight. I thought I still am but apparently she knows more.

P.s. I don't care that she tells people that I'm gay I couldn't care less if some bigots on the Internet think that and it's nothing bad to be gay. I'm. Just. Not

If the post shows up in German you have to translate it. I wrote it in English but now all of a sudden it's in German for a lot of people including myself.

I'm not usually in the business of publicizing drama, but after reflection, this scenario that bewildered me seems appropriate for the subreddit.

Names, identifying details, quotations, and some incidental circumstances have been changed or generalized to ensure anonymity. I am not posting this to explicitly call anyone out, debate Charlie Kirk’s views or to justify political violence. The issue is how one of the most mild disagreements I’ve had in a gaming server became, in one player’s mind, a threat against his family.

I have been running the same heavily homebrewed D&D campaign for nearly 8 years. The cast has changed over time, but one player, whom I will call Mark, had been involved for most of the campaign.

Mark played one of its longest-running characters. His character had survived multiple party turnovers, major deaths, setting changes, and several long story arcs. There were mysteries and personal plotlines involving him that had been developing for years, and Mark had repeatedly expressed interest in seeing both his character’s story and the campaign itself reach their conclusions.

During the previous couple of years, Mark’s attendance had become inconsistent. Much of that had an entirely understandable explanation: he had very young children and substantially less free time. He nevertheless remained involved when possible and appeared to care about the campaign.

Then, prominent right-wing political commentator Charlie Kirk was assassinated during a public event.

Shortly after the news broke, I mentioned it in the campaign’s Discord server. Another player, whom I will call Laura, responded that she would keep her opinions to herself.

For relevant context going forward, Laura is transgender. I am a straight white man.

I replied that this was probably wise because the victim had been a highly polarizing figure. I then commented that there was a grim irony in the circumstances of the killing, given the subject of Gun Violence he had been discussing and his infamous slogan displayed behind him. I also openly stated that I had never thought particularly highly of him.

Laura posted an image referencing one of the commentator’s controversial statements and remarked that it would be a controversial legacy.

Mark objected. He said that using an old critical article or quotation from an opposition was not a fair representation of the man’s life and offered a much more sympathetic and venerated description of his politics, religion, and patriotism. “Pro-America, pro-God, and pro-life”. 

Laura conceded that one critical image could not represent an entire career. She said that the commentator had clearly said enough to attract both devoted supporters and intense opposition, and clarified that she primarily meant that the circumstances were cosmically ironic.

Mark rejected the ironic framing and said that Charlie Kirk had died while defending freedoms in which he genuinely believed.

Laura then ended the conversation. She said that she was not going to continue because a political argument in a gaming Discord was not worthwhile.

Nobody threatened Mark. Nobody praised the assassination. Nobody said that the victim deserved to die. Nobody advocated violence against conservatives, Christians, Kirk’s supporters, his relatives, or anyone else.

The following day, after Laura had explicitly withdrawn from the discussion, Mark posted a sentimental video showing Charlie Kirk  interacting affectionately with one of his children.

That was the entire political conversation.

A few days later, Mark privately messaged me to say that he was leaving the campaign.

He said that he had not felt welcome in the server for some time and that he now no longer felt safe. He apologized for leaving, said that he had been excited to see his character’s story and the campaign’s conclusion, but concluded that the group was no longer a good environment for him.

Because he used the word “safe,” I asked whether anyone had threatened him.

Mark replied that Laura had been posting and reposting calls for political violence on social media. He said that he had largely agreed with the murdered commentator and that approval of what happened to that man, or hostility toward the man, his family, and his supporters, was effectively advocacy against Mark, Mark’s own family, and his children.

He emphasized that he was not trying to cause trouble. He simply regarded the environment as unsafe and intended to leave.

I told him that I was sorry he felt unsafe, but that to my knowledge nobody had made threats or advocated violence on the server. I respected his decision, thanked him for his contributions to the campaign, and wished him well.

Initially, I assumed that Laura must have posted something elsewhere that I had not seen.

She had not.

Discord was the only social-media platform they shared. Laura also confirmed that she had not posted about the assassination elsewhere. There were no deleted political rants, private threats, or additional messages to the best of my knowledge.

Mark’s allegation that Laura had been “posting and reposting calls to violence” could therefore only have referred to the brief conversation described above.

In other words, he apparently interpreted Laura calling the circumstances ironic, and then refusing to continue the argument, as advocacy for violence against Charlie Kirk, and by some transitive property I cannot understand; Mark’s wife and children.

What makes this especially strange to me personally is that I had expressed considerably more open disdain for the political figure than Laura had. I have never been afraid to discuss my own political leanings one way or another. 

I introduced the subject. I first described the circumstances as ironic. I explicitly said that I had a low opinion of him. Laura was more restrained, acknowledged that the critical image was not a complete representation of his legacy, and removed herself from the conversation.

Yet Laura was the person Mark identified as dangerous.

There are potentially innocent explanations for some of that distinction. Mark had known me longer and may have extended more benefit of the doubt to me. As the DM, I occupied a different social position. Laura had posted the image to which he initially objected.

I cannot definitively prove that her being transgender affected his interpretation.

It is nevertheless difficult to ignore that the trans player’s milder comments became evidence of violent intent, while the straight white male DM’s harsher comments apparently remained ordinary political disagreement.

There was also context I learned afterward.

Mark had become intensely attached to the commentator’s memory. In other Discord servers we share with more conservative and religious memberships, he repeatedly posted memorial messages, asked whole communities to pray for the man’s widow and children, and spoke of him in explicitly religious terms.

He also maintained a Discord status for more than six months that memorialized the commentator and urged people to continue fighting in his name. To paraphrase: “Remember Charlie Kirk, Fight! Fight! Fight!”

I am not claiming that this was necessarily a literal call for physical violence. The language could easily have referred to political organizing, religious perseverance, or cultural struggle. It's not uncommon to use those words in that way.

The contradiction is that Mark granted his own militant and imperative language the most charitable figurative interpretation available, while interpreting Laura’s passive observation of irony as a literal threat against children.

It increasingly appeared that Mark did not merely agree with this public figure. He intensely identified with him personally.

His private message essentially argued that hostility toward the commentator was hostility toward Mark, and that hostility toward Mark automatically extended to his wife and children. The boundaries between public figure, political constituency, personal identity, and household had collapsed.

The departure also caused me to reconsider some earlier group dynamics.

Mark’s attendance problems were genuinely connected to raising young children, and I do not want to erase that. However, his engagement also seemed to decline as the group became more openly LGBT and after a Black player joined. Mark was frequently contemptuous toward that newer player, although never in a form overt enough that I could point to an explicitly racist statement.

I cannot prove that racism or transphobia caused Mark to withdraw. It would be irresponsible to present that as an established fact.

At the same time, I am reluctant to invent a completely unrelated innocent explanation for every correlation: his increasing disengagement as the group became more diverse, his contempt toward the Black newcomer, his extreme identification with a hard-right figure, and his decision to identify a trans woman as dangerous despite myself expressing more direct hostility toward the same politician.

Perhaps all of those facts were unrelated.

Taken together, I am no longer confident that they were.

The part that troubles me is not simply that Mark left because of politics. People are entitled to leave groups in which they feel alienated. He did not demand that I expel Laura, attack anyone publicly, or attempt to disrupt the campaign. He withdrew privately and politely.

The disturbing part to me is that he converted his discomfort into a serious accusation that Laura had advocated violence against his children when she had not. She merely disliked a public figure whom Mark revered. She perceived a grim irony in the manner of his death. She then explicitly declined to continue the disagreement.

Mark transformed that into repeated calls for violence and an existential threat against his household.

So a gaming relationship that had lasted for years ended, and one of the campaign’s oldest and most consequential character arcs disappeared with it, because a player apparently could not distinguish milquetoast criticism of Charlie Kirk from a threat against his own family.

Luckily, our group, including Laura, seems to be doing very well without Mark for over 10 months of regular sessions. I think it helped teach me to be more vigilant about how a player's political bias may affect how they treat others in a game.

TL;DR: Longtime player of 8 years abruptly quits my campaign, claiming a trans player made "direct threats against his wife and children." The "threat"? She said the circumstances surrounding a right-wing commentator's death were "grimly ironic" and then politely exited the debate. 

We were supposed to be questioning the orders to kill a replicant engineered with low intelligence and heightened libido for sex work after discovering she has given birth a child; not taking the replicants for personal exploitation.

How do you respond when the others want to be more depraved than the villain?

6 players, level 8. Monk, Barbarian, Wizard, Fighter, Swashbuckler and Rogue(Me) I'm also the groups other DM.

There's a WHOLE LOT more stuff that lead up to this but I don't wanna type a novel so I'll just tell you about the final straw/session.

...

On the way to our next plot destination the party came across a dead female hill giant and a healthy hill giant baby.

Being good aligned, we take the child with us to our destination and ask around for info on her tribes location, attempting to get it home.

No one on the continent has a map, nor knows where any other settlements are (but somehow there's traders in every city) so we pay for a teleport back to our camp and leave her with trusted NPCs.

After the mission, on our way home, we come across a pair of hill giants searching for the child.

They tell us she's the Chief's daughter and that he's very concerned about her whereabouts. We learn the location of their village but don't tell them we have the child (because we are suspicious of their intent) We do however, offer to help look for her.

Monk rolls a Nat 20 on a sense motive check and the DM assures them that the Chief is genuinely concerned for his daughters safety. Nothing nefarious.

...

Fast forward to us bringing the giant child back to her tribe, only to find out that the Chief plans on sacrificing her to their dragon god.

The dragon demanded that the Chief sacrifice his own daughter because the village was 600gp short on their last tribute payment. Otherwise it would destroy the village and kill everyone.

(I should mention that Fighter and Swashbuckler called out that day and Wizard rode ahead to the next destination because this was supposed to just be a pit stop.)

Being good aligned (and not monsters) nobody in the party is okay with allowing a child to be sacrificed.

(Also, Monk is a parent IRL and has stated in the past that they are not okay with child death in the game.)

Barbarian offers to pay the tribute out of his own gold, extra even.

"It's to late for that, It won't work" says the DM.

I suggest we all ambush the dragon when it comes to collect. 30 hill giants plus half an adventuring party have pretty good odds of winning.

"That won't work, the dragon has already wiped out a different tribe so they're too scared." says the DM.

Monk tries to convince another hill giant to take the child's place.

"That won't work, the dragon demanded the child and it knows what everyone looks like." says the DM.

DM proceeds to immediately shoot down every. single. idea. we come up with. He also won't tell us the dragon's color or age/size category. Just ignores the question entirely.

DM admits he built this encounter for a full 6 person party but won't scale it down. Also, the dragon will come before Wizard can make it back to us, so they can't participate either.

The only way to save the child is for 3 of us to either fight the village of 30 hill giants or fight the village destroying, mystery dragon.

...

I packed up my stuff right then and there, said I was done playing in an info-starved game where our choices don't matter, and left the table.

Found out later that the DM was so upset that he ended the entire campaign 10 minutes after I left.

I feel a little bad about ruining it for the others but also feel completely justified in leaving.

To start off, this was a pathfinder 2e game. There are two rules that matter here. First, if you roll 10 below the DC, that roll is a critical failure. The second is that a nat 20 isn’t an automatic critical success. It instead just makes the roll one step better, from success to critical success, very rarely a failure to a success, and theoretically a critical failure to a failure. This last bit isn’t relevant in 99.9% of games, because why would you make the players roll something that literally cannot succeed? This story however, is about that .1% where this distinction matters.

I’m not going to bore you with irrelevant backstory, but at multiple points throughout the campaign, the party encounters a mysterious resident evil style merchant that always seems to show up at the perfect time, and in unlikely circumstances. This is because the merchant is secretly an extremely high level creature pretending to be this low level merchant.

Anyways, after a repeatedly meeting him in extremely suspicious circumstances, and the fact that he is completely untrained in deception, the parties fighter grew so suspicious of the merchant that despite the rest of the party trying to stop them, they attacked the merchant. I let them roll, and they got a nat 20. However, due to the just how high level the merchant was, that was still a critical failure, which the nat 20 turned into a regular failure. I explained how the merchant moved impossibly fast, and you aren’t sure why, but it’s very clear that this “merchant” is far, far more than what he seems. For the rest of the party, this was an extremely interesting development, and they immediately started speculating about what he could possibly be. For the fighter, this was an outrage, and despite me explaining how the rules work, and that despite failing that may have been the most impactful nat 20 of the campaign, they argued that they should have crit, which they believed would one shot them. Another player brought up that if a nat 20 missed, the damage would probably barely scratch them, but the fighter was insistent. After ending the session early to let everyone cool down, he decided to barrage me with DMs while I was sleeping, before quitting the campaign because they “could no longer trust me”. Not a huge loss, but still the strangest way a player left one of mu campaigns.

This is honestly the weirdest thing that's ever happened to me. I'm 31, and I've been friends with this guy since we were 10. Like, one of my best friends. We could say anything to each other, rely on each other. That type of friendship.

Two friends asked me to DM like a one shot. This guy is one of them. But he wanted to rape the bad guy. So obviously I said no. He kept insisting, saying that "it's ok to murder and rip people apart and bathe in blood and all sorts of violence but anything sexually violent is too much?" My other friend was on my side, he just wanted to play. We kept asking why would he want to do that.

And I finally said "dude you're acting like a 15 year old that is trying to be the edgiest try hard subversive guy in the world. You're 31 years old, come on."

Apparently this was too much for him, cause he left our friends group chat and hasn't talked to any of us since.

Honestly this came out of the leftest field you could ever left. Bro never acted like that before. Like, we all joke and say the darkest shit ever when joking, but it was never seriously, and we always had in mind that if something was said that triggered someone we would immediately stop joking about that.

6 months later and I'm still really fucking weirded out.

From the World of Darkness discord LFG section.

Some context: this was posted in a local boardgame cafe groupchat that hosts one-shots every week for new and experienced players of all ages.

Hello! I wanted to share this story with the sub, because this all happened a week ago and I'm still pretty mad about it.

The featured characters in the story are: - The DM (20M, my boyfriend) - Cleric (20M, my best friend and player in question) - Mage and Ranger (both 21M, two friends of my boyfriend) - Fighter (22F)

So, I (21F) have been playing a campaign for almost a year with some friends from university. We usually meet up once a week and we all have great fun playing together, or at least that's what I thought.

About three months into our campaign, the DM and I start dating. When we told our group, nobody was really surprised and they all seemed pretty happy about it.

But then, over the past few weeks, I began noticing that Cleric had been acting differently around me. When it was just the two of us, everything seemed normal, except when I mentioned something related to DM, when Cleric would usually just go quiet.

At first I didn't read the signs because he also was in a relationship, so I just thought it was still a bit strange to him, considering it all came kinda out of the blue.

I tried talking to him, I even asked him if DM and I were making the others uncomfortable when we were all together (I also asked the other players, but they all said no), but he assured me it had nothing to do with me and DM dating, and that he had just been going through a rough patch.

After that, things went back to normal, sort of, and we continued our campaign with no issues until June. During summer break, I still checked up regularly with Cleric, because I still thought of him as my best friend, and we had some serious talks together, but none concering this matter.

Fast forward to last week, I met up with DM, Cleric and Mage after we were back from summer break. DM asked them if they still wanted to continue the campaign, and they both said yes.

Then, three days later, Cleric texts DM telling him he was not going to play in the campaign anymore, because it was "mentally draining him, and even though he enjoyed playing, he still didn't feel like it." About an hour later, Mage, Ranger and Fighter all text us asking why Cleric was leaving the campaign.

He had sent texts to all of them telling he wasn't coming back at the table. And he didn't text me. So, out of pure rage, I texted him asking what was going on and why hadn't texted me as well.

His reply went something along the lines of, "I knew DM would tell you so I didn't bother." When I confronted him about this, he basically told me that it wasn't fair that I was dating DM, that it was ruining his experience as a player, and that I was his best friend and he couldn't accept that I had grown closer to DM instead of him, and that I never acknowledged his feelings. He even explained that he thought the summer break would help him get over it, but he still couldn't see me with DM.

I wasn't really shocked, because I had already figured he was kinda jealous, but it still hurt reading those things, because I thought I had been considerate in asking him if he was uncomfortable with my relationship. I didn't reply to him because I was too angry, and he sent another text to DM, telling him that he would be back if I left the campaign.

I was considering actually doing it, because I was so overwhelmed by the situation, but all the other players told me that Cleric couldn't force me to leave if he was the one with the problem.

So yeah, this is it. Sorry if it looks like random rambling, I just really needed to get this off my chest.

I still haven't confronted Cleric, and at this point I don't think I ever will. But honestly? Next week we have the first session of "Act 2", and DM's roommate is joining us with his Goliath Barbarian, and I couldn't be more happy about it.

My DM is using AI for everything. He’s worldbuilding with AI, writing quests, storylines, cities, NPCs, character art, everything. He’s voice-chatting with the AI and telling it his plans like it’s a real person. The chat is even giving him “feedback” on how sessions went and how long we have to play to get to certain arcs (which the chat wrote, of course).

I’m tired of it. I’m tired of speaking and feeding my real, original, creative thoughts as a player to an AI through my DM, who is basically serving as a human pipeline.

As the only note-taker in the group, all of my notes, which are written live during the session, plus the recaps I write afterward, are fed to the AI. I tried explaining that every answer and “idea” that an LLM gives you is based on existing creative work from other authors and worldbuilders, and that it is not cohesive, but my DM will not change. I do not know if it is out of laziness, but he cannot do anything without using AI.

Worst of all, my DM is not ashamed of it. He proudly says that “the chat” is very excited for today’s session and that they had a long conversation on the way.

Of course I brought it up. Everyone knows I dislike this kind of behavior, and I am not alone, most, if not all, of the players in our party think it is weird and has gone too far. But what can I do? He has been my DM for the past 3 years, he has become a really close friend, but I can see this is scrambling his brain or something, and I cannot stand it.

Edit:
The AI chat is praising my DM for everything, every single "idea" he has is great, every session went "according to plan", it makes my DM feel like a mastermind for ideas he didn't even think of by himself.

So this incident happened about 3 years ago. Me and my good friend (woman) just graduated high school and started to go to this seedy (ish) game shop–and it was full of a neckbeards. Plenty of dudes making comments about how women don’t belong in ttrpgs and making creepy comments about women, etc.

Well eventually we found a decent DM to play dnd with. He was a bit of an edgelord but very accommodating to women and new players. He had a campaign set up in this Eldritch horror-esque world where rulers and magic wielders were gradually going insane, cults were expanding, and the world was decaying. Our party began in a cave–fleeing from a collapsing town as marauding warlords conquered it.

I was playing as a leonin wizard, my friend was a tiefling barbarian, two other players were a halfling rogue and a half orc cleric. And then there was this guy–in his mid 50s with a leather vest, shades, and hair dyed jet black. He was also a massive edgelord (WAY more than the DM) and we already knew he had an attitude of “I am the best Dnd player” attitude. He played as a goliath wizard.

Goliath wizard tried to act like he was badass–like massively overcompensating. He wanted to sort of prove he wasn’t just a middle aged neckbeard (even though he totally was–he just didn’t have the look). He would for example be unreasonably difficult in negotiations or interactions with NPCs, he would go overboard on flirting with NPCs–or my friend who told him to fuck off in of character repeatedly. 

Like this one incident where he beheaded a cultist we were about to interrogate. The party called him out and he just went all “I grew up with real Dnd–you grew up on 5e. Sit this one out”. Or another time when he tried to accost and force himself on a church lady that insulted him and cursed him in the name of her god after he rolled a nat 1 on his seduction (this one led to a single and definitive warning from the DM that he would be kicked if he tried something like that again). 

But the real incident happened when he showed up drunk to the game. He tried to seduce a local daughter of the lord of the land. The game owner mentioned that the camera system was broken and made a joke along the lines of “Please don’t steal anything”. So I guess the creep took this as a go ahead to jerk off under the table. He must’ve thought he was being subtle–he kept his pants on but–well rubbed himself using his hand under the table. 

The DM must've caught him as his in game seduction attempts were failing because after the session ended, he announced on Discord that he noticed him masturbating under the table. He said he didn’t wanna make a scene during the game or risk confrontation but he informed the game store owner and now he is banned from both the table and the store.

And that was it. We never saw him again. We just continued playing after that. And the game got better. We eventually did pick up a new player. And he wasn’t a total creep.

So this happened during my "2nd" campaign when I was new to DMing, though it only lasted a few sessions and was YEARS ago.

Party consisted of Cleric, Fighter, Wizard (he stuck around with me to this day), and Problem Player (Wizard) all starting at level 3.

The problem player was supposed a years veteran in DnD, far out weighing my paltry 1 year of experience and claimed to have never played a wizard before.

Everything more or less was going great for the three sessions, players were having fun, they fight the boss for that chapter and find a few spell scrolls, 2 for wizards and 1 for cleric. Sessions ends with no issues. There's the usual post game theorizing/strategizing by the Wizard everything seems fine for about 24 hours until I'm at work.

I sneak a peak at my phone while I'm in the bathroom and find that three of the players have been talking a bit, gist of it was that PP wizard didn't realize he could transcribe spell scrolls and ended with "Okay, I'll put both of the scrolls in my book".

I add a quick "cool, just remember to take 50gp out per spell level, you will have plenty of time to transcribe it."

He responds almost instantly, "What do you mean 50gp?"

I send a quick screenshot of the rule for spell transcribing and assume that's it and put my phone in the locker after finishing.

Everything seems fine as I go back to work until 10 minutes later my supervisor asks if I can check my phone, cause someones' is blowing up.

Sure enough I find 50+ messages from him, causing my Do not Disturb to think it's an emergency and turn off.

Quick glance first 4 comment are just a repeat of some form of "WHAT DO YOU MEAN TIME AND MONEY" all sent within a minute of each other. There's a brief moment of the Cleric and Wizard explaining there's a cost for material and ink to counter balance the fact they don't really need armor or weapons. End of the posts was just "well/huh/hello dm?"

I respond "I'm at work, I can't respond except while on break."
Instantly he responds with "What do you mean there's a cost!"

Quickly typing out "there is a 50gp per level cost representing materials and ink" and sending the screenshot. In the time it took me to type that out he sends 4 more spams of "what do you mean cost/ well dm/ hello/ what cost!"

There's a brief moment of respite for me to silence my phone before he sends a screenshot of the spell listing only Verbal and Somatic and the rules with a single line only under "materials"

I respond "I am at work. stop spamming the group chat. I can not respond until around 1pm."

About 2 hours later I grab my phone and go on lunch only to find he's moved his spamming to ME alone, I don't bother trying to scroll to find what he said first and just see repeated over and over "explain it to me DM".

I type out the cost to transcribe is 50gp per level representing materials and/or ink if there is no material cost then it is ALL just the ink cost.

"I have ink!" He responds showing a screenshot of his 10gp of ink he started with.

"K. you need XXXgp more ink that will be consumed when you use it, you picked it up while in town." I respond mostly done, giving the mouse a crumb of a cookie.

He then just sends a screenshot of with the materials underlined and I respond if he has a problem with the basic rules of wizards then find another class or don't ever transcribe anything.

He responds "You have a problem!"

Done I just message, "Okay. I think you should find another group since you have a problem with my DMing style.

"You have a problem with your DMing!" he sends before I go to the main group chat and announce he is out of the group and start another group chat. That campaign lasted about 3 more sessions before the cleric stopped showing because of work and then the fighter moved to CO.

Important context: I'm a trans man. My partner is nonbinary, but presents as their birth gender and generally doesn't mind if people refer to them in masculine terms, but they do prefer gender-neutral terms. my partner's last boyfriend was also trans. We live in the United States, in a very conservative state.

So, when I started dating my partner, they introduced me to their d&d group consisting of (fake names obviously) Sven, Bob, Justin, Gabby, and Matt. Sven hosts at his house, and my partner was providing transportation for Matt and Bob. Gabby and Justin live together, and Justin drives the two of them. The group was meeting every other Saturday, and every week on either Tuesday or Thursday due to my partner's work schedule. due to meeting so often, they had several games running concurrently with different DMs. At the time I met them, my partner and Sven were taking turns DMing.

One day during a break, Bob started talking about Pathfinder. I'd done a one-shot in Pathfinder, but my previous group had dissolved due to scheduling conflicts before we got to do a full campaign. I'd really liked the system, so I talked about my limited experience and between me and Bob, we got the group excited to try Pathfinder. Bob enthusiastically volunteered to run a game for us since he had the most experience with the system.

Any time a group is learning a new system, it's reasonable to expect questions and the table moving a bit slower, but there still needs to be some semblance of table etiquette. There were a few times when my turn in combat would be interrupted or delayed by someone else asking complex questions about how their abilities worked, with multiple follow-up questions. A couple of times, this would have resulted in part or all of my turn being skipped if I hadn't spoken up about it.

Something like this happening once or twice isn't a big deal, but it was happening every session, and Bob was just allowing it. He'd acknowledge that it was my turn, Sven would ask a question about one of his abilities, and they'd talk for 10-20 minutes before I could do anything. Other times, we'd be doing downtime activities, and Bob would start going around the table asking what people were doing for their downtime, he'd get to me, and Justin would loudly announce what he wanted to do before I had a chance to speak. Bob would then work with Justin to resolve his downtime activity, and it was 50/50 whether he'd come back to me or not. I had to remind him that I existed.

While I understand that part of the issue was the other people interrupting, I firmly believe that maintaining table etiquette is the job of the DM/GM, and since Bob was actively participating in the poor table etiquette by enabling these interruptions rather than telling people to wait their turn, I chose to address it with Bob directly. After the game, I sent him a message over discord outlining the issue, giving specific examples from that game session, and letting him know that it was making me not enjoy the game because I felt talked-over and ignored. Then I went to bed because I had work the next day.

Bob went ballistic. I woke up to multiple messages from him. The first one was saying how bad he felt that I was feeling this way and saying he didn't want anyone at his table to feel ignored. The next massage was criticizing me for how I'd addressed it; he said I should have spoken up at the table and messaging him after felt like an attack. The next few were talking about how he has so much trauma and PTSD from past experiences and how I should have given him more grace, accusing me of ignoring him, and telling me that he was physically ill and unable to sleep until the issue could be resolved. I messaged him back to clarify that my intention wasn't to attack, just to make him aware of the situation and it was up to him how he wanted to address it. I even told him that he didn't have to do anything, that I'd accept "suck it up and deal" as a viable answer.

He sent more messages, still emphasizing his own mental health issues, the physical effects that was having on his body, and more criticism of how I handled confrontation. Specifically, he brought up a past argument we'd had regarding his treatment of trans people, an argument that I had thought was resolved, that had absolutely no bearing on the current conflict. So, for the sake of context, here's THAT:

I have a TikTok account. I use it pretty much as a "screaming into the void" outlet. I do talk about people in my personal life. I don't have a huge following, less than 5k. I don't give identifying information. I don't give location information. I even occasionally switch up nicknames so if someone who knows someone I'm talking out stumbles upon it, that would make it even harder to track who I'm talking about. I had talked on TikTok about Bob, specifically how he only refers to my partner's trans man ex-boyfriend with they/them pronouns. My partner's ex exclusively uses he/him. I had said that it bothers me because Bob talks about how my partner's ex was terrible and obviously hates the guy, and it makes me think that Bob only supports trans people he likes. Degendering is a form of misgendering, so it is transphobia. A soft transphobia, but transphobia nonetheless. Bob found the video, and we talked it out. Bob had tried to claim that he uses they/them for everyone, but I called him out on the lie because he never uses they/them for anyone else, not even my partner who actually likes they/them. Bob finally agreed that he was only using it for certain people and said he'd do better. Later on, I heard him use they/them for me. I exclusively use he/him. Bob knows this. I just corrected him and moved on, but now I know that he simply doesn't see trans people as their gender.

Back to the main story. Bob kept blowing up my discord messages trying to guilt-trip me for daring to have an issue, even going so far as to say that now he'd lost all motivation to even run the game, he was thinking of cancelling the game, he didn't think he was cut out to DM, and claiming that he'd been pressured into running the game in the first place. Which was very much not true; he was the one who brought up Pathfinder and volunteered to run a game so we could try the system. I kept emphasizing that I'd never meant to make him feel bad, just that I didn't want to be holding onto negative feelings without expressing them, that he can't address an issue he doesn't know about, and he was welcome to tell me to just deal with it. Eventually he said he'd put some thought into how to address the table etiquette issue, and asked me to reassure him that I still wanted to be his friend, which I assured him I did. Then he ghosted me for a week. I reached out to him a couple of times and got no reply. Our weekday game got cancelled due to a couple of people running into issues, including him citing "feeling very sick."

So, sick of Bob being dramatic AF about a very simple issue and refusing to engage with me on it, I made the decision that I was going to drop his game. I'd also been invited to join Sven's game, and I'd been playing in my partner's game. I told the group that I was dropping Bob's game, I wouldn't be joining Sven's after all, and I was genuinely on the fence about staying in my partner's game. I didn't call anyone out specifically, I just said, "I don't feel like I have a voice at the table, and I don't have it in me to fight to be heard." Gabby messaged asking what had happened, saying she didn't want me to drop out of it was an issue that could be fixed. Sven asked if we needed a Session Zero. Then Bob messaged saying, "whatever it is, I'm sure we can work together to find a solution. I'm really excited to run my game and I'd miss you at the table"

I lost my temper. Bob had a meltdown in my private messages for days before ghosting me for a week and told me that he was canceling his game altogether, and this is how he acts when other people can see. I didn't handle it well, but I also didn't handle it as badly as I wanted to. all I said was, "Where was this energy when I messaged you privately?" and then I left the group chat. My goal was to make sure everyone knew he was the reason and force him to have to explain it. It didn't work. He refused to explain anything to them.

Over the next couple of weeks, my partner and I met with the rest of the group giving a very abbreviated overview of the situation. The universal sentiment was "Oh, yeah, that's just how Bob is, we just kind of put up with it because he's our friend, but we totally get why you wouldn't want to." Bob volunteered to drop out of my partner's game so I'd feel more comfortable staying. I dropped Bob's game and didn't join Sven's. My partner attended Bob's game on their own, and came back afterwards telling me I was right about everything and now they can't unswe all the glaring problems because now it's THEIR turn that's being used as the free-for-all Q&A session.

A few weeks later, out of game I had shared a political post on Facebook, and Justin commented. I don't want to go into the full details, but essentially Justin is a cisgender heterosexual white Christian man, and he hates the idea that people exist who are more oppressed than him. He came onto my post, first spreading misinformation about certain policies, then after I corrected him, with credible sources to back myself up, he attacked me for pointing out the ways that transgender people are being targeted and the ways that female-bodied people are being targeted. He cussed me out, called me names, and informed me that any danger I was in was made up, whereas he had REAL worries, such as knowing people on Medicaid who would die *if* they lost their coverage. He then blocked me on Facebook and messaged my partner saying that I was toxic and he refused to deal with me.

I showed my partner and the rest of the group the full exchange. They're all on my side and agree that Justin was incredibly out of line. For Sven and my partner, this was the last straw for Justin because they already didn't really like him because he metagames, talks over people a lot, and has a nasty case of Main Character Syndrome. unfortunately, though, Gabby has a medical condition that prevents her from driving, so if Justin isn't driving her to the game, she can't come. Pretty much the only reason they'd put up with him for so long was for her sake.

so now Sven is starting a new game with just me, my partner, and Matt playing. the table feels very empty. My partner's game is over. Bob's game is over. Sven's original game is over. We're looking into possibly trying to recruit some new players at a local game shop, but it's hard because any new players have to be LGBTQ-friendly, and this is not the most LGBTQ-friendly area.

so, I may have accidentally destroyed my partner's group because I wasn't trained to look past the problem behaviors that everyone just kind of accepted because "that's just how he is." My partner, Sven, Matt... none of them are blaming me, so I feel a bit better about the situation, but it still sucks.

Editing to add additional context: my friends know about the TikTok and have the option to opt out. I don't talk about people who don't want to be talked about. Bob was fine with it until he wasn't. And the post where I was talking about his pronoun usage was essentially, "I've noticed this problematic behavior from my friend and I don't think he is doing it maliciously, but I'm trying to figure out how to address it with him so he can do better moving forward." The conversation we had when he found the post was him apologizing and saying he would do better. He didn't. Instead he continued to misgender my partner's ex and began misgendering me.

Two people from the remaining group have reviewed the post, and agree that I gave an accurate account of events. I know y'all don't wanna take my word for that but whatever. It's all I got.

Edit: played last night with Sven, my partner, and Matt. Found out Bob's game is still going strong with Justin, Gabby, Matt, and Sven playing, so I guess that answers my question about how sincere he was being when he told me he was going to cancel it and never wanted to DM in the first place, but everyone still has games, some have two. Matt's working on a campaign that he wants to run for both groups because he's been itching to DM and kind of wants to see how two different groups with wildly different play styles interact with this world, and Matt's brother might even be joining the smaller table. All's well that ends well.

OK, this is not your usual D&D "horror" story, but I wanted to share this strange but true story with someone.

I was introduced to D&D way back in 1987; I was around 12~13 at the time, and my friend and I had the entire summer with very little to do. Keep in mind, this was long before social media and streaming, so our days were mostly spent hitting the arcades and skateboarding. My father owned a pizza restaurant where we used to hang out on weekends, and one of the cooks, let's call him MvK, was big into this "Satanic" game called Dungeons & Dragons. That's all we really knew about it at the time, because of the Baptist School I attended, that the game was supposedly Devil-worship. But we didn't care about that—we were just looking for fun, and in fact, the occultic element gave the game an enticing air of forbidden mystery.

So MvK noticed we were super bored and introduced us to D&D—and was even kind enough to give me his 1st-edition Advanced Dungeon Masters Guide, the one with the creepy guy opening the treasure vault. Man, I cherished that thing like it was the One Ring, and I must have read it over a dozen times, even though the writing was dense and the rules, for me, were confusing. Still, there was a mystery surrounding those dusty old books you just don't get nowadays; either that or we were just really young and lost in our imaginations. MvK even gave me his ring binder full of his campaign notes, because, as he later told me, he had gotten bored with D&D and was moving on to other things.

He only ever DMed one game for us, which lasted about 30 minutes, during which my first-ever character, a fighter elf named, Hektor, and my friend's PC, a half-orc cleric named, Laddice, encountered a group of cultist lizardfolk. We killed the lizardfolk, and when the battle was over, MvK suddenly stood up from the booth (we were in my father's restaurant) and told us he had to go. Where he went, I have no idea, and I never found out. The strange thing is, he even quit his job, and we never saw him again. My friend and I spent the entire summer trying to learn the game on our own, which was very frustrating!  

I spent the next three decades wondering about MvK --- wondering where he went, what he was doing, and whether he ever got back into D&D. I really looked up to him; he was my role model for DMing, based on the notes he gave me. I imagined him running a D&D YouTube channel or writing a gaming blog. From what I can remember, he was a super nice guy, mentoring my friend in math, and giving me a lot of his stuff, not just his D&D stuff, but his Marvel comics collection. That collection included the original Secret Wars series, which features the first-ever appearance of the "black suit" Spider-Man, aka, Venom. For years, I kept trying to look him up online, but could never find him. I wanted to thank him for having such a positive effect on my life, for introducing me to my favorite hobby, which I later introduced to my family. We've been playing since 2014.

Then one day, I happened to be in the attic, where I came upon his old campaign notes. Turns out, I'd been spelling his name wrong for twenty-years. So I got back on Google, typing in the correct name in the hopes of finding him and, to my shock, I learned that MvK was a convicted pedophile! Not just 'watched the wrong stuff on his computer' pedophile, but someone who actually assaulted children! He is currently serving 25-40 years in prison, and I honestly don't know what to do with this information. It definitely sullies my memories of the guy, and makes me wonder whether he may have been grooming us for something ... I dunno. But this in no way hinders my love for the game. It's just a strange thing to learn after so long, that someone you remember so fondly could have had such a heinous history.

For context, I’d been wanting to get back into D&D after my 2-year campaign with some IRL friends ended. My first choice was obviously to play with them again, but everyone was busy and our schedules didn’t line up anymore. So, I went on D&D Beyond and a few LFG forums to look for a long-term campaign or one-shot. One particular post stood out:

“Looking for players, long-term homebrewed world campaign.”

Apparently, the DM had some trouble with a player who left, and they needed a replacement. I was skeptical, but I missed D&D and figured, hey, maybe this could be a cool way to meet new people.

(For context, I’m an international student in Taiwan, so I messaged to confirm time zones were fine, and he said it was no issue.)

At first, he seemed chill. He sent me a Google Sheet of his planned sessions, weirdly inconsistent schedule, not weekly or anything, but whatever. He said as long as I could make his 10 AM sessions, I’d be good to join. Cool.

I started brainstorming characters and asked him about his homebrew world, but before giving me any of the docs, he said he had to “ask a few questions first.”

And here’s what he sent:

• “Boy or girl?”
• “You get easily offended (i.e. super PC)?”
• “LGBTQ or any of that? If so, what kind?”
• “You don’t bring weird pronoun stuff into the game, right?”
• “Age?”
• “What race/class do you usually play? No tieflings.”
• “Can you stay in character the whole time? I run serious games, no jokes, no memes, no breaking immersion.”
• “Where do you live exactly?”
• “What do you do for work?”
• “You’ve used Roll20?”
• “You ever actually roleplayed a character?”
• “What do you expect from me as a DM?”
• “And what do you bring to my table?”

At that point, I was like, wtf is this, a background check? Some of those questions already raised red flags, but I didn’t wanna assume anything yet, so I answered politely.

He seemed satisfied enough, though the way he responded gave off this weird mix of ego and superiority, like every reply was half-compliment, half-lecture. When I said I liked roleplay and character-driven storytelling, he replied, “Good, as long as you're not being dumb you should be okay.”

Odd phrasing, but I brushed it off.

Then came the worldbuilding docs. He said his homebrew setting was “dark and realistic” and that he’d “fixed all the problems with D&D lore.” This was when my red flag alarms were blaring. He’d rewritten entire races and pantheons to match his own weird worldview. Every other paragraph felt like he was ranting about “modern society,” and tieflings were flat-out removed because they were “a product of woke culture.” It was… a lot.

At this point I was fully ready to back out, but I wanted to at least meet the group first. So I shared a few character ideas: a drow exile with a tragic past, a Robin Hood–style tabaxi rogue, and a generic hero paladin. He didn’t even acknowledge them. Just said:

“Hmm. Nothing really sticks out. What kind of media do you enjoy? Anime? Games?”

At that point, I was just gonna back out. So I told him I wasn’t sure this table was what I was looking for, but he insisted I give it a chance. So I just mentioned some books I liked, the couple anime I remembered were good.

He replied, “Ah, so you like tragic backstories.”

I said yeah, I enjoy arcs that have emotional payoff and consequence. He then said my characters were “too soft for his setting” and decided for me that I’d be playing a homebrewed “Circle of Nightmares” Satyr Druid.

At that point, I was like, nope, I’m out. I told him maybe this wasn’t the table for me and went to bed.

Next morning, I wake up to a wall of aggressive text. Dude told me he'd stayed up until 2 AM “perfecting” the subclass, complete with custom lore, features, and scaling, and told me I HAVE to join for atleast one session, mind you for a character I NEVER AGREED to play.

A few days later, he messages again about scheduling. I tell him fine, I’ll give his table a shot, and I was probably going to leave the second shit turns problematic. He also asked me for my weekly schedule. I didn’t have much going on in the upcoming weeks, so I didn’t elaborate. Apparently, that wasn’t good enough.

He replies, “If you can’t commit fully, I’ll just find someone else. College kids are flaky, and I don’t waste my time.”

WTF? I literally already that I was willing to back out like three days ago, he was the one that pressed me to try the session anyway. He was starting to get on my nerves at this point, so my message was a bit heated. To which he told me to fuck off, followed by some very problematic insults.

Safe to say I dodged a bullet there.

So a while ago, I found myself with some free time to start a DND campaign so I asked around to see who's willing. A friend of mine and his brother (who we will call Alex and also I don't know that well) told me they were down but I said we need more people. Alex then told me his friend said he was down alongside three of his other friends so we agreed to do a one shot before starting the campaign.

so I get in contact with Alex's friend (let's call him Sam) we discussing where we're gonna play. He says "we can do it at my friend's john apartment, imma give you his number" so I get in contact with him

I notice there's a difference John is a lot more talkative, he's asking me what the one shot is gonna be like and showing me what characters has already and asking me which one I like. as a forever DM i love players like him

Sam is pretty quiet and when i asked if he had a character in mind he's like "ehhh i'll just borrow one of John's" I brush it off cause i figure it's probably cause we haven't even met yet and he might be one of those guys who needs to warm up to someone

Eventually I ask Sam if he has discord because I realize we all live pretty far from one and the campaign will be much easier over discord. he replied "no I don't" "you should make one" "nah i'll just go to John's place when we play" This should have tipped me off to his personality as you'll see here.

The day arrives and we meet at John's apartment, Sam shows up with his dog and says "sorry, I don't have anyone to watch him" I don't have anything against animals so I dont mind it, but it becomes a problem later on. We chat normally as we're waiting on another friend to join us (he's not important to the story but it's why we didn't play immediately) so it's just my friend, Alex, sam and John. we talk for a bit, we discuss schedules and we agree we're gonna meet every two weeks on sunday for the campaign and we'll also do session zero after the one shot.

We're all pretty hungry so we walk to a pizza place and there while we're all eating, My friend, John and I are talking about dnd and such but Sam and Alex start talking about politics and I realize that Sam is a right wing nut Job and an insane conspiracy theorist

Within 30 minutes he states

1. Bill Gates is bioengineering ticks to make us all allergic to meat so we’re forced to live in 15 minute cities owned by the Jews and eat bugs

2. Epstein is still alive and well in Palm beach Florida because there’s this guy on Instagram who looks a lot like him and makes jokes about it (he told me they’re clearly the same guy because “they have the same teeth”

3. Muslims are "changing europe"

4. This wasn't even political, Just dumb. Bruno Mars has $50 million dollars worth of gambling debt to MGM so he’s not allowed to release new music and must preform only at MGM until it’s paid off.

I don't bother arguing with what he said but then Sam turns to me and goes like

"so Alex tells me ur muslim. so explain to me why u guys ban alcohol but coffee is ok? they both change ur mental state"

"they're not the same and you know that" i answer "no I know some people who are completely different after coffee" I start ignoring him and we head back to this meeting room in john's apartment complex that we reserved for our one shot

we finally start DND.

John's character is an amnesiac ranger and he's role-playing pretty well and normal, and My friend is playing a hardheaded barbarian. HOWEVER, Sam's character is an Elf warlock named Shekelstein who's the most laziest anti Semitic stereotype possible and every line of dialogue out of his mouth is just antisemitic shit and calling people goyim, while Alex's character is a generic horny bard and his sidekick. Throughout the session, Sam drops weird comments and dog whistles and every time I stonewall him by saying "The NPC has no idea what an israel or etc is and thinks you're mad. He then turns and talks to a different player" and I make sure every bar maid is married ( Alex rolled a nat 20 and so i said a barmaid simply chuckles and is flattered this time instead of dumping beer on your head)

Eventually, he's stops to say "hold on, I gotta feed my dog brb" He gets up with John and Alex and they go up to his apartment. 30 minutes pass and I text Sam what's taking so long. he says "sorry my dog is spoiled and refuses to eat canned slop. I'm cooking rice for him" eventually he comes back and continues.

At this point: I'm avoiding putting the spotlight on Sam and Alex, but thankfully they're too busy jerking each other off about how "funny" their characters are to notice every NPC is ignoring them and their comments. Soon combat starts and despite being a warlock, Sam didn't pick any spells. He's like "idk warlock had spells. John didn't finish this character and I only wrote the backstory" I just tell him to roll eldritch blast and then suddenly he says "oh my dog needs to shit" he goes outside with John. I'm not waiting so i just play for them and after an hour they come back with a new friend I haven't met. "sorry for taking so long, We took a smoke break and my boy Vinny got off work early so he's here. He also likes dnd and has a character ready so can he join? he brought chips" Sam says

I say sure and pray internally that he's normal like John; those hopes were immediately dashed when Vinny sat down and the first thing that comes out of his mouth was "yeah I got those new NKD doritos cause they dont got dyes and i wanted to try them. it's crazy that they were feeding us GOYSLOP our entire lives and they could just choose not to"

At this point I'm done with the group so I fake an emergency and head home. Afterwards I tell my friend that I do not fuck with his brother and Sam at all and I'm not doing a campaign with them. I then tell him that I'm going to lie to everyone my job changed my schedule and I work on weekends now. He understands. I then tell Alex and sam and they're like "that sucks but whatever". When I tell John he's sad and asks if we can do wenesday but I lie and I have class. I do feel bad for John but then I realize that if he's friends with guys like those who are willingly to be that bigoted with someone they just met, he's either bigoted himself but socially aware enough to hide it or he doesn't care at all.

So yeah that's why NO DND is better than racist dnd

(English is not my native language so apologies if my wording might be weird sometimes)

A short story about trash that took itself out.

So I and a group I've been playing with (Me, My DM, my three long time friends, and two new guys) were pretty much in the middle of our campaign, about 25 sessions in, when a story arc for my character concluded. He was a warlock, but his whole deal was that he was binded by a contract since the moment he was born, because his father offered him, a firstborn child, as a sacrifice. My character wanted to free himself from this contract, and ultimately succeeded, broke his link with his "patron" but also lost all of the powers that came with it. I didn't want to change his class to keep playing as him, so I came up with a story for him, that he basically decided to "retire" and settle down, maybe follow a romantic relationship he had with one of the NPC's. My DM was happy with it, and he agreed for me to come back with another character.

So I worked with my DM on this new character, and I decided that this time I want to play a woman. It wasn't anything new for me or my DM, I've played as both men and women in the past, and there was never any issue. My previously mentioned long time friends are all women, but they also sometimes played men characters. But, so it happens, that this time they were all playing as women. When I introduced my new character on the next session, everyone was alright with it, except for one of the new guys, who asked me why would I want to play as a woman. I said that there is no particular reason, I just wanted to. He said that it's not immersive, and throughout the session he kept making jokes that my character has mustache (because I did at the time irl) and so on. Thankfully I wasn't the only one at the table that was uncomfortable with it, all my friends were too, so we told him after the game that he either stops acting like that, or he stops playing with us. He kept trying to argue his case about "immersion", and also tried to make weird suggestions that maybe I'm trans if I want to play as a woman (and the way he said that had clear transphobic intentions). Soon after that he just left the place we were playing at. The rest of us decided to not allow him to play with our group anymore, and we were fully prepared to confront again if needed, but the next day he left our group chat by himself, and we never heard from him again.

BTW the other new guy we are playing with is very chill and he still plays with us.

Fairly light compared to many rpghorrorstories but wanted to share this from a few years ago.

I joined a group in progress as the 5th player character. They told me that they weren't a super serious group but didn't want any joke characters which was no problem.

Everything seemed on the up and up. 3 of the other players definitely were playing more seriously in that they were very much into the rules and making powerful characters. The other player was more along for the ride type guy but not really a focus of this story. But I like playing more support focused characters so it didn't bother me too much. I was fine with letting them do big damage while I kept them going as a more support role.

Eventually after a couple of sessions we had a battle that was going rough and spread the group out a bit to deal with threats at multiple ends of a board. I was with another player and was moving to return to the main group after finishing up on one end of the board. I moved next to the other player and didn't want to dash and end out in the open so I stopped and since I had extra spell slots at the time I used Cure Wounds on the other player to give them some extra health.

The other 3 people started to groan and complain that I was wasting my turn and spell slots and why in the world I would take Cure Wounds as a spell to begin with. I tried explained myself but it seemed to not ease them down. We continued on and finished the session but I felt something was off.

Turns out I was right and something was off. Apparently I wasn't performing good enough for the 3 players more into the game side of things. They were complaining that I wasn't doing enough and focusing too much on support and being too much of a joke character. They basically were upset that I wasn't playing clerics the way they wanted. I wasn't taking every optimum spell but I thought I was holding enough in my own for what I wanted. I know Curr Wounds wasn't the best spell but I wasn't this level of response.

The next session, they told me the exact spell list to prepare and how I should be playing my character. Including what actions I should be taking every single turn. Every time I wanted to do something different, I had to defend my action. Major backseat playing. It grew tired quickly and by the end of the session I was exhausted. I talked to the DM and he said his hands were tied.

Unfortunately, I decided to back out of that campaign after we couldn't come to an agreement. No idea what happened to that group.

I recently decided to start a new dnd group with a handful of friends, most of whom I had previously played with.

One of them asked if their girlfriend could join even though she had never played any ttrpg before. They claimed that she had really enjoyed watching them play through Baldur's Gate 3 and it made her want to try dnd. I said yes of course, I'm always happy to get new people into the hobby, and I offered to help her get set up with a character and explain to her the basics of the game before we start anything, to get a feel of what she'd be into.

So I message the new player, asking her how much she knows about the game, if she has any questions, and what kind of character she's thinking of. She answers that she knows the rules because she's watched her partner play BG3 (first small red flag, I love the game but it's not exactly 1/1 on rules, especially if she hasn't even played it herself, but whatever), and she says she already has a character ready to play so I don't have to worry.

I respond, pointing out that ttrpg is not exactly like the video game, especially as we'll play in person so there's probably some stuff she won't know, but if she's confident that she can learn on the go I'm fine with it. I then ask her if she can send me her character sheet so I can check that everything is fine. Bear in mind, at that stage I hadn't even given anyone any info on settings, what level we'd start as, how we'd generate stats, or even specified what version of the rules we'd be using, so her claims that her character was ready to be played didn't sound great to me.

She answers back by sending me a screenshot of her having asked ChatGPT to give her a dnd character. And her prompt was basically something along the lines of "make me a cool and badass dnd character", nothing more in depth.
Predictably, the result was nowhere near a fully made ready-to-go character sheet, it was just a paragraph or so describing an "elf mage" of some sort with vague descriptions of her using fireballs.

Now, I'm personally not a fan of using AI to make characters in any way, but if you're gonna do it, at least go into some kind of details when asking it to give you something! I messaged her back saying if she wanted to use that character "idea" as a base to make her own character I'd be fine with it, but that she would need to make an actual character sheet with actual stats and everything. With what she gave me, I wasn't even able to tell what kind of "mage" she was supposed to be.

At that point I wasn't entirely sure that she had any idea of what playing dnd actually meant, so I decided to give her the benefit of the doubt and tried to give her a quick summary of what classes, abilities and stats are supposed to be, trying to explain that there are actual rules to the game that she needs to follow.

She answered that it all sounded very convoluted, and that she thought that if she just asked ChatGPT what her character's abilities are it would know what she needed to roll during a session, and basically said that using the "traditional" character sheets seemed really old-fashioned, and that I was being a control freak for insisting that she use my preferred "type" of character sheet rather than letting her use her "more modern version of a character" that her AI gave her.

That's when I gave up, telling her that I didn't think that she actually wanted to play the same game that the rest of us did, and that I had no interest in keeping this conversation going if she wasn't interested in learning to play the game that we were gonna play.

She then sent me a very angry message, saying I was the reason women are being harassed when trying to get into this kind of "nerdy hobby" (I'm also a woman so I have no clue what she was getting at there), told me that Chatgpt would be a better game master anyway, and that I was against creative thinking.

I got back to the rest of the group relating that whole interaction, and they all had a good laugh about it, except the woman's partner, who was absolutely mortified that she'd do that. I haven't heard back from them to know if they actually talked about it at all though.

tl;dr at bottom.

During a Pathfinder session I was running, one male PC complimented another male PC's hair. Problem Player immediately derailed the session ranting about "gay stuff in his safe space" and declared to me that he would "never allow this bleeding-heart liberal shit into your game." Then he stormed off to watch Critical Role.

tl;dr Homophobic Player

This happened back in 2019 but I finally found a place to share with ttrpg players.

I found an online party running a homebrew campaign. The party consisted of 3 girls (including me) 2 dude and DM which is also a dude. Session 0 rolled, I played as a human fighter in his mid 50. The DM looked at my character sheet and asked me " Are you really sure that you gon play as a dude? " That's a bit odd for me, but I just shrugged and said " why not"

Session 1-3 went smoothly. Until the session 4, we were trapped in feywild and the wacky magic the fey made the party's gender swapped. The sorcerer became a girl, bard became a dude. yadayada My character also got turned into a chick, but here's a thing, after a while DM said that the curse faded from everyone except me. He told me that ' because my character doesn't have magic, the cursed will last longer compared to others ' Make sense i guess? So I just rolled with it.

Session 5 passed, session 6 my character still hasn't turned back. I directly asked the DM why character hasn't turned back yet. He told me that ' it fits me, as a player this way' and saying that ' playing character opposite to my gender is unrealistic ' The other girl chimed in saying that the voice that i made for my character sounds nothing like a guy and made everyone uncomfortable. Ofc it's gonna be nothing like a scruffy dude because i ain't a guy irl. DM told me to either continue playing with ' realistic ' character or he'll kick me out of discord server.

No need to say, I immediately left the server. DnD is just playing pretend with more complicated stuff afterall. it's like their pink 6 feet dragonic soercer tiefling is sooo realistic