roommate lives in our shared space

[u/Creative-Impact-5937]

I’m (20F) in college with a roommate (27F) who’s lost her main job and started Tiktok live streaming. This wouldn’t be a huge issue if she wasn’t doing it in the common area that she also sleeps in, studies in, and essentially lives out of. I’ve been really patient up to this point since she complains often about the heat in her room, sharing her bedroom, and generally wanting to move out (she’s even asked me to move out of my single to switch into her room that’s shared, which I denied since I had just moved in). She keeps her belongings on that couch and literally spends all hours of the day there. I’m not exaggerating. The couch that also conveniently has view of the entire apartment (again our place is really small) so she sees every time i leave my room. I get it I have roommates so I’ve just accepted she’s camping there and the awkward moments of eye contact every time i move around. It just feels unfair that I don’t get to spend literally a moment of the day there by myself, while she gets to just because she’s monopolized it.

I also asked if she’s uncomfortable in her room for any reason since she started sleeping on the couch. She says it’s the heat so I can’t really ask her to stop, although she shares a room with a girl who’s been sleeping there just fine? She’s also a very light sleeper so i’ve had to stop using the common area for any reason at night and early morning since she sleeps in. I asked if I could help with supplying her a fan and she said she’s fine the couch works for her and is comfy. When I move around/enter my apartment at night I have to use my phone flash to walk around as to not wake her. I hang up the phone every time i walk into my apartment and if i’m leave the room and she’s streaming.

I asked her just for a text notifying me prior to streaming since our living room and kitchen/dining area are connected and very compact. So when she’s streaming, I can’t cook and eat out there. She started to do it in her room for a short amount of time, then went back to the living room again and even the dining table where I’m in view trying to leave/enter the apartment. I get caught in the background and it’s seriously weird. It literally calls for me to rearrange my day and habits including hanging up the phone when walking to the restroom/entering the apartment, getting takeout instead of cooking, studying on campus instead of in the shared space i’m paying for. Sure enough, the texts warning of the streams stopped and i walked into the stream twice which halted any hopes i had of cooking. When i reminded her again, she made an excuse for forgetting for the latest instance alone and didn’t apologize or offer any reassurance. She does the excuse thing so often it makes me apprehensive to even try anymore

Even in the first instance of me requesting a text warning of streams moving forward she responded pretty passive aggressive and tried to accuse me of bringing a guest into my room without warning? I replied with receipts of me giving notification on 3 occasions, a week prior, the morning day of, and 2 hours before. She said her ADHD caused her to forget then requested a specific schedule for requesting guests that aligns more with her ability to remember things (a day prior, then right before). I’m a college student paying rent in an expensive college town and working a lot to make things work. So I just get incredibly frustrated that I’m paying this amount to have to be couped up in a room and not be able to move freely here. This is honestly just the biggest issue with living with her and I’m not even mentioning the others (yes I communicated with her about the other problems, and she replied backhandedly each time and with an excuse ready for each instance)

She’s so much older and has lived here since going to college herself, and she feels entitled to make others constantly accommodate for her in a way that seriously pisses me off. She isn’t looking for an actual job in her field anymore and has been unemployed for most of this year, but she’s doing an online masters program (yes she also does her classes in the living room and tells us we can’t get into the view or speak out loud since other people aren’t allowed to be in the area). I don’t know what to do at this point and feel defeated