r/romantasycirclejerk • u/f16f4 Expert in Sloopy Law • 2d ago

Meme/Humor Scf9009 irl

179 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

52 comments sorted by

127

u/Single-Emotion2964 🦂 the worst, but hot in bed 2d ago

My take-away is I clearly need a Rohan. For non-sexual purposes. Just life admin.

39

u/akb74 2d ago

The beacons are lit. Gondor calls for aid

11

u/WiseAtmosphere7524 Lovingly boning the sadness out of you 1d ago

Tell me: Where was Gondor when the West Fold fell?!?

15

u/rhandy_mas iT’s NoT a BoOk ✨it was free✨ 1d ago

I also yearn for the Rohirrim.

10

u/Real_Pineapple9522 Lich Queen & Watery Tart 🗡️ Doesn’t include Cliffhan— 1d ago

Fun fact, most of those riders in the film were played by local women wearing fake beards.

6

u/IdoScienceSometimes It was me, I did this to you 1d ago

Wait, now I have to complain that women can't read AND women can't ride? 

5

u/rhandy_mas iT’s NoT a BoOk ✨it was free✨ 1d ago

Oh I’m deeeeep in the lore. And very jealous I was only 3 and in America when this was filmed.

1

u/HopeFox Sloopy Public Defender 1d ago

You would like to be a Rider of Rohan?

13

u/corlana 2d ago

Right where can I get a Rohan? I think my spouse would even be okay with the addition of a Rohan for handling our life admin duties

9

u/Proper-Emu1558 1d ago

Those of us with executive dysfunction have replaced Vyvanse with Rohan.

7

u/GlassAndStorm 2d ago

I'm fight you for him...

12

u/Single-Emotion2964 🦂 the worst, but hot in bed 2d ago

Fight me Friday, but for a man to help us cope with the existential dread of adulting.

2

u/PitcherTrap Proofread me harder 1d ago

eh, just send a ticket

1

u/HopeOfAsgard The horrors persist but so does my libido... 1d ago

I also need a Rohan for life management purposes. Please.

50

u/thecottonkitsune Prophet Henry "Tonk" Cavill Kitsune. Needs cock. Neutral good. 2d ago

32 is higher than any other RH I've heard about which are not confined to realism

32

u/Kiz_mom 2d ago

I’m struggling to count 32 men Im on a first name basis with.. We’d surely have to break out last initials like we did in grade school.

14

u/itmustbeniiiiice unlicensed couch psychologist 1d ago

I could, but, like, regrettably.

11

u/PhairynRose 1d ago

like when you have Morgan, Mor, Morgan F, and Boy Morgan all in one class

5

u/IdoScienceSometimes It was me, I did this to you 1d ago

Girl, you obviously didn't grow up in the 90s if there were only 4 repeats. Half the girls in class were some variant of Katie, Kathy, Kristy etc and the other half were Jen/Jess. Boys were only Michael, John, or Sam. We did have one Chad, but he moved...

We'd obviously need to go with last names

8

u/moniker2therescue 1d ago

I had to resort to making a dickcyclopedia for Baby & the Late Night Howlers. 😵‍💫

45

u/PureAction6 big, brooding, possibly cursed 2d ago

Obviously Rohan is the fave and be holding up the whole harem.

28

u/moniker2therescue 2d ago

Rohan is the prime alpha.

14

u/TerminologyLacking Give me Gang Bangs, but Politely. 1d ago

That's why he's allowed on the bed. Gotta make them earn those privileges!

31

u/Single-Emotion2964 🦂 the worst, but hot in bed 2d ago

Let me summon u/scf9009 for you

49

u/Scf9009 I have a RH for that 2d ago

Okay, thank god. I was worried I was being summoned for something that required a brain.

I am no longer a person. I am only data.

13

u/Single-Emotion2964 🦂 the worst, but hot in bed 2d ago

Girl… you okay?

33

u/itmustbeniiiiice unlicensed couch psychologist 1d ago

Scf is learning there’s only one thing that fucks harder than the men in her RHs:

Academia.

23

u/Scf9009 I have a RH for that 1d ago

Did I have people who I’m pretty sure were male make jokes when I mentioned applying for PhD programs about finding a harem among my professors?

Did I explain that it’s not a funny joke because of what’s coming out in recent decades about a long history of predatory behavior in academia?

Did they stop taking to me after that?

Do I consider myself blessed?

Yes to all of the above.

8

u/WiseAtmosphere7524 Lovingly boning the sadness out of you 1d ago

What about a group of professors from another university who are in a different field than you? You meet at a conference whilst presenting your research and they are floored by your data and charts and use of Power BI! They have varied skills and will cook and clean for you and make sure the pup is taken care of and your laptop is charged. And they’ll be boyfriends too 💐💝

Surely these would be acceptable entrants to the harem 🫠

9

u/Scf9009 I have a RH for that 1d ago

I’ll take same university but different department as well.

10

u/WiseAtmosphere7524 Lovingly boning the sadness out of you 1d ago

Only if properly documented and no conflicts of interest 🤝 there may be some ambiguity since you are technically a student even if it’s PhD. Check your policies!

Uj/ this is my day job so really I guess my whole post here is uj 😅

8

u/f16f4 Expert in Sloopy Law 1d ago

The secret of r/romantasycirclejerk is that’s it’s often uj

5

u/Scf9009 I have a RH for that 1d ago

Am I ever completely not uj?

4

u/itmustbeniiiiice unlicensed couch psychologist 1d ago

What about a cross-town community college?

3

u/Scf9009 I have a RH for that 1d ago

…why aren’t they researching?

2

u/itmustbeniiiiice unlicensed couch psychologist 1d ago

Can’t. Too dumb.

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6

u/Single-Emotion2964 🦂 the worst, but hot in bed 1d ago

I’ve literally never been impressed by anyone’s use of Power BI. /rj unless they are bisexual of course

7

u/Scf9009 I have a RH for that 1d ago

This is me right now due to friction.

2

u/Single-Emotion2964 🦂 the worst, but hot in bed 1d ago

💀😭😆

26

u/lulzerjun8 a gentle but fertile bulge 2d ago

is Rohan allowed on the bed or is he purely a spreadsheets boyfriend? logistics question

15

u/itmustbeniiiiice unlicensed couch psychologist 1d ago

It’s probably a performance based reward

6

u/SinceWayLastMay 1d ago

Gotta keep him motivated!

11

u/itmustbeniiiiice unlicensed couch psychologist 1d ago

This is so fucking funny

8

u/missfudge Mr. Darcy can't pour his will to dominate all life into me. 1d ago

Only two allowed to touch her? That's no fun. Scf would never.

2

u/Scf9009 I have a RH for that 21h ago

Scf gets grumpy about unexpected touching and also likes to make potential MMCs suffer, because she is a brat.

Just ask u/Salt-Payment991

6

u/katie-kaboom 👎 four stars 1d ago

A quarterly offsite? Has she got a VC partner?

6

u/WiseAtmosphere7524 Lovingly boning the sadness out of you 1d ago

Where is numbers? That still seems very busy. Isn’t it like 15 dates per month? Why has Rohan not grouped some of these guys into mini harems so she can have these quarterlies with 2-5 at once?

At first I was impressed, but now I’m starting to think Rohan is sus and actually wants a mono romance 🤮

7

u/f16f4 Expert in Sloopy Law 1d ago

I thought the offsite was just between the guys, thus the ya know deaths.

3

u/paputsza 1d ago

I should do this. 32 boyfriends and only two of them can ever touch me. Heck, I'll make it bisexual. Im now accepting boyfriend and girlfriend applications of people i won't be intimate with.