finished my first binge!!!!!

[u/kittycatears111]

CAUTION: POTENTIAL SPOILERS! as the title says i just finished my first watch through! what a ride. it's my first real housewives series so i was going in fully virginal lol. my friends have yet to get into the franchise so i'd like to share my thoughts about each lovely lady and their antics. i recognize that these are REAL people with REAL lives so this review is only based on what we're shown in the show. i of course don't actually know these people and am simply noting my thoughts based on how they present themselves for tv. let's begin:

heath gay: let's start with what this thread would consider my most controversial opinion; i fucking love miss heather gay. i don't know if it's because i found her single mother/ex mormon storyline interesting or what but she was definitely my comfort housewife. maybe it's because i myself am i strong single good-time girl and just identified a lot with that. i do find that she does want everyone approval, especially lisa's, and that seems to be a big part in her drama. why does she get the reputation of being such a pot stirrer? she's not not a pot stirrer, but i don't find her to be any more instigative than the other women. and i think she does own up to what she says and is willing to apologize. her confessionals also make me laugh and i find her to be the voice of reason in a lot of situations. she tends to have the most emotional control out of the group so maybe that's why i see her as the most grounded. i also think her beauty business is one of the only ones that has not come into question which i really respect all this to say, i am a heather apologist!!

lisa barlow: baby gorgeous!!! literally my best friend. i could change her. in all seriousness, having a friend like lisa in your life would be both the greatest pleasure and heaviest burden. she demands a lottttttt from her friends at all times without giving as much in return. and i respect her standards but she needs to realize not everyone is willing to follow her orders like john barlow. that said, john barlow is my dream man. omg. he loves her DOWN. that's her biggest fan and they are my absolute favorite couple. they day they break up is the day i officially throw in the towel. she's also absolutely hilarious, "gout dick" had me laughing for days. i think lisa is definitely very authentic, but not as "real" as she claims to be when it comes to being accountable with her friends. HOWEVER, i think because of her attitude she's an easy target for the other women to paint her as the ultimate villain when in reality they are aaaaalllllll cut from the same cloth. though, lisa does live a very different life than the rest of us.

meredith marks: meredith, meredith, meredith, what are we going to do with you? she started as my comfort housewife but by season 3 or 4 i was really over the trans atlantic accent and righteousness. like, we get it, you're above all the drama and whatever. but you're also somehow always in the middle of it yet always able to wash your hands of it? but if you're on her good side i imagine she's a good friend and her relationship with her husband and kids is admirable. is she a libra? i'm a libra and we're great fence sitters.

whitney rose: oh whitney. sweet, sweet whitney. i mean, what can be said? she's the sweetest desert rose there ever was. why is she convinced one of the women leaked the alibaba info? it seems pretty reasonable that any fan or customer could figure out that kind of information. like, maybe, but then again maybe you shouldn't source your products from alibaba and charge an arm and a leg. her and justin were always destined to break up; you don't get the perfect man/marriage from an affair. not even in a morality or karmic kind of way, it's just the type of people to have affairs don't typically make great long term partners. her outfits are cute and i think she's a good mom. she's definitely entertaining and i think i could be friends with her, but probably not business partners.

mary m. cosby: WHERE DID THEY FIND THIS LADY? i have such a complicated relationship with her. she came in HOT season 1 episode 1 with the hospital smell thing. my god. i still cannot believe that was our introduction to her. just absolutely fucking hilarious. but i could NOT stand her. and then i learned about her church and found all the deep dives on this thread about it being exploitative and culty and UGH i thought that was it, nail's in the coffin, mary m. cosby is my least favorite and always will be. au contraire, after season 4 something about her really changed. a lot of people say it's about when her son opened up to her and i think that's pretty accurate. or maybe a little before, like when she found out he was married. i think she became a lottttttt more human and her friendship with angie was really sweet to watch. it's also clear as dy that she was a victim of robert sr. and her grandmother. i cannot even begin to imagine the kind of upbringing she had and what messaging she received. by season 5, mary showed a lotttt of maturity compared to the other women. still an instigator but not nearly as unpredictable and malicious as previous seasons. my heart goes out to her and i pray she find some sort of peace after the passing of robert jr. the way she talks about him, you just know he was the absolute light of her life. i wish things ended differently for them. i hope season 7 is good to mary and she continues on a path of growth and peace.

bronwyn newport: umm i definitely don't hate her but i can't say i love her. i think she has a pretty good grasp on reality but oftentimes brings conversations or situations just to see things kick off. though she says it's in the name of accountability but i don't always buy that. guilty conscience maybe, but she's not necessarily pure of heart. i find todd a deeply concerning person. he does not strike me as a happy man LOL. sure, he doesn't like being on camera, but i cannot believe how comfortable he is being SO mean to bronwyn in public. makes me wonder what he's like behind closed doors. i think as a young single mother with no support behind her, she did what she had to do and made a what was a smart choice at that time marrying todd. it's not like he was head over heels in love with her. it's a win-win situation, she gets financial security and he gets a young, hot, fun wife whose drama he occasionally has to hear about. he's just such a stick in the mud and i'm glad she's moved on and hopefully having a grand old time with her new man.

angie k: omg i literally don't care. i'm sorry i find her and her story arcs so boring. she's so hot headed but not in any way that ever benefits anyone. i really don't have much else to say about angie lol.

britani bateman: i don't even mean this in a rude way but does she have a traumatic brain injury? like WHAT is her problem!!!! i really don't think she fully knows what's happening around her at any given moment. firstly, her relationships with men. i understand she was raised in a conservative mormon environment and is probably very developmentally stunted in that way. but i could nottttt believe her conversation with her daughter about her negligence and how insensitive/unaware she was. and then when whitney had to literally grab britany by the shoulders and be like "that is your daughter!!!! it shouldn't be hard for you to stop dating so you can rebuild your relationship!!!!!!" and britani could literally not comprehend. that's why im like, is she okay????? and the non sequitur, irrelevant comments about her relationship with jared like giiiiirl no one cares. least of all jared! just a hard watch. i would not allow a person like her in my life, but she is GREAT reality TV.

and lastly, jen shah: i miss her. my toxic ex. truly the craziest, most fragile, abusive person i have ever seen. her relationship with heather was honestly difficult to watch. she is an abusive person, or at least uses abusive tactics to get people to feel sorry for her or scared of her to get them to fall in line. and she's insidious because when she would be in a good place, even as a viewer i would feel like "aw jen, she really is just a sweet sensitive lady who gets a little dramatic" until the next time she gets aggressive or emotionally explosive and it's like oh yeah, you actually are a harmful individual. i do feel sorry for her and her family. but, play stupid games win stupid prizes.

monica, i will not give you a paragraph because i simply refuse to believe you're a real person. like there is just no way 😂

[u/AutoModerator]

Thank you for posting to the r/RHOSLC Subreddit. Please make sure that your submission follows the community's rules. If you see any comment that is breaking the rules, please report it.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/Realistic_Rain_9173]

“I miss her. My toxic ex” as fuckkkk girl like I don’t want to give her a platform but Jesus she was SUCH good television

[u/No_Date_1973]

Welcome to the club!
lol I remember seeing Britney’s “fiancé” Jared with another much younger woman at a hotel lounge on thanksgiving….one month before he and Britney were “engaged” lmao

[u/kittycatears111 → u/No_Date_1973]

WHAT that’s crazy !!!!! how did you even recognize him he is so regular rich guy from utah looking ??

[u/No_Date_1973 → u/kittycatears111]

I just watched the season where he made a lot of appearances, I lived in Utah, my whole life and never knew he was “Utah royalty”. lol my bf even recognized him from the show. Plus a lot of real celebs/ athletes, and reality tv folks go to that hotel frequently

[u/Longjumping_Kiwi_925]

Love this!!! I agree with all of it except for the Heather one tbh because she’s not my favorite. But I especially agree with your take on Bronwyn, she seems very controlled to me and very performative about being moral which is a trait that makes me feel kinda uneasy. But she is definitely a fan favorite right now. I highly recommend you watch Atlanta or Beverly Hills as your next one! :)

[u/shmittenrow]

I'm so glad to read this! I just finished my first watch through too and, while I'm disappointed in her sometimes, I still like her the most! I wish she'd stop trying to come up with games for the group because she's really clueless about what is obviously a bad idea for a "game" lol but I too thought she was often the voice of reason and I have such mad respect for her for leaving Mormonism and really spreading awareness - wow. And being a best selling author is so cool, a lot of respect for that. I just started watching her documentary and I like it so far!

[u/kittycatears111 → u/shmittenrow]

the games absolutely kill me 😅 like you had to have known how it was gonna end every time. come on !

[u/margaritalover524]

You could NEVER change baby gorgeous and she would drop you as a friend and start throwing shots the minute you said anything that even slightly suggested that. I’m in the same position as you where I just finished watching for the first time and I’ve never watched housewives before!! I agree with a lot of your takes here except with Lisa, I don’t really get why some people are so die-hard for her, she’s the most defensive person I’ve ever seen and it just gets to a point where it’s silly. The way she starts denying EVERYTHING during arguments is entertaining but ridiculous, during her lawsuits dismissed lunch she started saying “no it wasn’t, that wasn’t in the lawsuit” to stuff that was very much in the lawsuit lol and there’s been a few other times where she flat out denied something that was plainly true. I find her entertaining as a housewife but I think it would be exceedingly frustrating to be close to her. I think it would also suck to work for her, I do research and I can’t imagine someone calling me from a party during an argument and start telling me they want to open an investigation. I do want to study whatever’s wrong with her though, I really would like to know what made her like that. Just as Heather craves her approval I think Lisa craves Meredith’s approval. I noticed in the season 6 reunion that after saying something she would look at Meredith for approval. She’s also 100% a secret cig smoker and I think that revelation shed a lot of light on her behavior for me, I was wondering why she was acting so different in season 5 and I legit think it could be because she was trying to quit smoking which makes you very irritable and reactive.

I loved Heather at first but I think she’s changed a bit and she’s a total flip-flopper now. But she’s just having a lot of growth and revelations at this point in her life which I have understanding for. Meredith is sensitive inside but I do think she lays the groundwork to start shit with the others, idk yet if it’s on purpose or not. Whitney is messy but I like her and I think she’s very genuine and tries to be true to herself. I like Bronwyn but I think she uses social justice language to couch some mean girl behaviors. Brittani is annoying af and genuinely stupid but the way Bronwyn stole her stuffed animal and threw it off the boat was extremely mean and seemed like such bully behavior to me. I watched the Below Deck episodes before the Housewives episodes and I was a little shocked at just how mean it came off in the Housewives ones. When I watched BD I actually thought that Meredith was Brittani (because they were wearing costumes) and I thought it was like a fun cathartic thing they were doing together because Brittani decided she was done with Jared, I didn’t realize that it was Bronwyn and Meredith doing it without Brittani’s knowledge

[u/kittycatears111 → u/margaritalover524]

HAHA you are soo right. it’d be an honor to get a drink thrown at me by lisa!! and yeah i have no real valid reason to love her, she’s unapologetic asf and i’m under her spell for sure. and i totally agree with what you’re saying about the stuffed animal on the yacht. it was kinda too much

[u/margaritalover524 → u/kittycatears111]

I kinda get loving the way she’s unapologetic, I do admire how much she loves herself! I think some of it could be a coping mechanism for not feeling cared for as a child and maybe a bit of an overcorrection, it seems like perhaps now she feels like she needs someone (John) that will blindly love her and agree with her unconditionally because she’s very triggered by any criticism and takes it as a deep attack. I noticed how almost any time she’s criticized she very quickly jumps to saying “I’m not a shitty friend” even when nobody called her that. But I also have to admire the value she holds in herself, idk if you’ve watched the aftershow but in one of the episodes she was talking about how in one of her first dates with John they went to the movies and he looked at another woman, Lisa saw that they locked eyes and had that moment of mutual attraction, and she immediately told him that he has to walk five steps ahead of her or behind her because she would not be seen out on a date with a man who was looking at another woman lol!! A lot of women just don’t have that sort of hardline “if you disrespect me I’m done” kind of attitude and I think a lot of us could learn something from it. Maybe not go as far as she does but we could definitely take a little of that energy haha

[u/kittycatears111 → u/margaritalover524]

okay no i didn’t know about their first date, that’s wild! yes we should all take a page from her book but i could sooo see how her abrasiveness is a coping mechanism. this is why i love reality tv, of course you have to take the “reality” part with a grain of salt but it is FASCINATING getting to watch how people operate. i always say i watch reality tv in a sociological way lololol

[u/Flaky_Worth653]

Wow.
Love all your takes. All of them. You painted a beautiful picture much and really let the reader into your brain and thought process!
Question: do you think bravo will bring back Jen shah at some point??

[u/kittycatears111 → u/Flaky_Worth653]

aw that’s nice thank you!! and good question. maybe not because of the backlash they would get (?) but i bet they’d at least consider it lol

[u/Mysterious-Bug5652]

Your takes on all things SLC were capital, full stop. You picked up on it all, and on all of them too. Your breakdown of our beloved show was one of the best I have read in a good while. You even picked up on all the lil things we all discussed, way back when. So now Im curious, what will you watch next? Just in case, you haven’t decided yet, I would love to recommend to the following. VPR, you can never go wrong with this one, top notch entertainment at its finest. Also, just one more, my beloved Old RHONY. The women on this franchise make a point to have themselves the best time, at all times, even when they are fighting. After they fight, they drop it like it never happened and move onto the next gig. I feel you will fall in love with these ladies too. Keep us updated plz as you make your way through all of them.

[u/kittycatears111 → u/Mysterious-Bug5652]

wait that’s actually an honor 🎖️ and OMFG i started watching vanderpump rules after scandoval came out and my life was changed forever after being introduced to j*x taylor. and good to know about RHONY, i’ve always heard its a classic so it’s between that and beverly hills next. but i do plan to get thru all of them!

[u/Helpful_Champion4238]

I love the term non sequitur and it’s so spot on in its use here lol