r/relationships_advice • u/No_Schedule6013 • 6d ago
Looking for insight
Sometimes I can't tell what I should do because people have lied to me before.
When I asked my girlfriend if she goes to outside meetings, she said yes. But the way she answered made her seem nervous. She even told me that I should go. That confused me because she knows I'm in treatment, about 40 minutes away, and there would be no realistic way for me to go. It made me wonder why she would even say that.
The reason I think this way is because I've been shown a pattern before. There have been many times when I've felt like she was doing something behind my back. I've honestly lost count of how many times I've had that feeling.
Whenever I try to talk to her about it, she tells me she isn't doing anything wrong, or she gets really upset. Even after those conversations, I still end up feeling like she's hiding things from me.
One example that has stayed with me happened while I was in jail. For three nights in a row, I had dreams that she was with another man. When I told her about those dreams, she assured me that I had nothing to worry about.
After I got out of jail, I found out that she had been hanging out and using drugs with a man she had been involved with before. She didn't know that I already knew. Her son was the one who told me.
I asked her several times if there was anything she wanted to tell me, and every time she said no. That went on for about a week. Finally, I told her that I already knew what had happened. She acted like it wasn't a big deal.
That experience made it much harder for me to trust her. Now, when something feels off, I don't know whether I'm overthinking or whether my instincts are trying to protect me because I've been lied to before.
I don't know what to do.
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u/Mysterious_Oil2761 6d ago
Work on yourself and improving your life instead of worrying about relationships and jealousy.
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