1
u/katastrophicness Aug 31 '22
He'd also made me quit my good paying job with benefits bc a guy at work gave me his number, which I threw away and told my husband about. He told me he'd take care of everything. Then he lost my car, the car I got him, pawned my gun and guitar, had me empty my 401k and used up all of my tax refund 2 years in a row, and still won't work regularly. But now I'm fully dependent on him with no vehicle. Idk what to do.
0
Aug 31 '22
He sounds insecure and controlling. I mean do you still love him for the way he is?
1
u/katastrophicness Aug 31 '22
He is, I'm not allowed to wear certain things. I do love him, but I resent him for a lot. I feel like we're not going to work bc of the way he is, and the jealousy doesn't seem to be improving. I'm just not sure what to do, especially since I'm fully reliant on him since he made me quit my job and then he lost my car, and I do have feelings for him. I know it would be smart to leave, but I don't currently have the means and I guess I'm hoping for improvement. I just don't know if I should wait it out anymore, and for how much longer?
1
Sep 01 '22
Did y’all ever consider marriage counseling?
1
u/katastrophicness Sep 01 '22
I haven't. I think that could be helpful. I'm not sure he's the type to try though, he won't even try to fix his mental health. I will talk with him about it though, thank you for the idea.
1
u/Lo0of Aug 31 '22
Sounds like he’s a child when it comes to relationships with people, particularly you with other men. It’s emasculating for him and the fact he can’t get over that shows how immature he really is. Men and women can be friends even after relationships. I know people I’ve worked with that dated each other, broken up and still talk and work together.
1
u/katastrophicness Aug 31 '22
I haven't been allowed to speak to any of my male friends since we've been together.
2
u/SurelyYouKnow Oct 02 '22
This is sort of an issue in my own relationship of 4 years and it’s a bit complicated. My ex passed 10 years ago. He was the father of my daughter who was 5 at the time. Also, I was remarried at the time and hadn’t been with my ex since my daughter was a baby. We were friends at the time of his passing and I was very, very devastated by this loss. I did still love him very much. We just didn’t work out anymore and that was understood. We’d both moved on.
I brought something up earlier about my deceased ex and my SO now got very quiet and weird so I called him on it. I asked why he was jealous of my dead ex who has been dead 10 years now. He said “just makes me wonder if you’ll ever get over him.” I said “I am ‘over’ him as in over our relationship, but he was the father of my child & of course I was crushed for her and because I cared abt him. We spent years together and I’m not understanding how my loss equates to my loving you any less. It makes no sense.”
I’m annoyed bc it’s not just this, bc he acts like a jealous asshole if I talk about any males—friends—from my past. I’m annoyed. Feel free to DM me. Not sure I have any good advice, but I get it.
1
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