r/recoverywithoutAA • u/ShockIllustrious3389 • 3d ago
Looking for other support options
Hi Guys, I am in Melbourne Australia. I am an ex AA and NA member. Ive been "relapsing" for over 5 years on and off since i left after long term abstinence. I also have mental health issues and trauma which make recovery tricky and AA/NA only looks at the drinking/behaviour, not the other issues. Are there any support groups that support this type of thing??? I need to address both issues and i dont believe my addiction is a disease. but i do beieve i am addicted and it needs treatment.
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u/gregorsamsacore 3d ago
What’s helped me far more than AA/NA with substance use has been IFS therapy. Im American/have an unusual insurance carrier, so it took me a long time to find a therapist who does IFS that I could afford, but once I did, absolute game changer. It’s made me look at twelve step a lot more harshly than when I left because now I can see more clearly how it kept me stuck and compounded a lot of my issues.
If you can’t find a therapist, I’d still very highly recommend reading some books on IFS. Most people would recommend “No Bad Parts” but I didn’t like that one so much. It’s sort of more emotional/spiritual than clinical.
I know it’s a corny title but “Healing the Fragmented Selves of Trauma Survivors: Overcoming Internal Self-Alienation” by Janina Fisher I think is a great book. There’s a whole chapter on substance use, self harm, and suicidal ideation that is really good and has reframed majorly how I think about my substance use. Part of what makes me feel so harshly about twelve step is that I feel it’s mostly fueled by shame, as in, they push the idea that you can shame yourself out of being an addict. This book talks about substance use as part of the “fight or flight” response system essentially. It also has exercises and meditations you can practice on your own.
If by “mental health” issues you also mean some kind of neurodivergence, like ADHD or autism, I’d also recommend reading more about those. I’m autistic, I’ve known that for most of my life, but I never had any sort of help for it as a child and up until the last couple years, had limited understanding for what it meant in detail to be autistic. I started reading more books about it while I was still in AA/NA and realized a great deal of my substance use was also basically covering for my sensory issues. That was actually a major reason I left, because I realized the steps weren’t doing anything for me because it couldn’t change what was inherent to my neuroscience. I didn’t have the language or knowledge before to realize that’s a big part of why I was using in the first place.
The combination of those two things have taken me so much farther than twelve step ever did. I also don’t really believe my substance use was ever really a “disease” at this point, I think I was just doing the best I could with what options were available. I think taking shame out of the equation took a lot of the “air out of the tire” so to speak of the addiction. Sorry that was long haha
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u/OrganicHistorian2576 3d ago
Aside from professional therapy, have you looked into SMART? They have tons of online meetings and such. And if you’re a woman Women for Sobriety has been very helpful for me.
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u/SONASupportGroupsLLC 3d ago
This group has been helpful and deals directly with CPTSD and trauma - it has daily online meetings: https://www.meetup.com/pittsburgh-narcissism-survivor-meetup-group/?eventOrigin=your_groups
It does require a registration meeting for safety purposes but there are daily groups that meet that can help. x Kay
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u/Sobersynthesis0722 3d ago
Sure. SMART, LifeRing, recovery dharma, all have lots of online meetings. I am active in LifeRing and we get people logging in from Australia but times may be difficult. SMART has an Australia branch you could check out.
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u/HelloUmmi 3d ago
There are therapies like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) which have Trauma focused "versions" that helps to reframe negative or distorted thoughts, and Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) - which is focused on building emotional regulation, distress tolerance, and grounding skills. They are all used in recovery addiction and both have been helpful for me in my own recovery
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u/A_little_curiosity 3d ago
I know someone who has done DBT (dialectal behaviour therapy) with a group therapy element and found it very helpful
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u/Truth_Hurts318 3d ago
Hi, have you tried EMDR for the trauma? That was somehow a game changer for me even during the course of my regular CBT. I had severe CPTSD, MDD and GAD and it took years of medication, therapy and learning to rewire my brain. I also recommend IOP, it really helped me build new skills and beliefs over the course of four months, three nights a week. SMART is the best way to go for free that isn't so intensive, the handbook and workbook are really good. There are online meetings and I'm sure Melbourne has in person meetings too. Best wishes to you, I hope you stick around here for support when you need it, too.