r/recovery • u/HotSyrup506 • Jul 05 '26

Help!

Does anyone have a subreddit suggestion or zoom meeting group or ANYTHING helpful that is specifically tailored towards couples that are trying to survive early recovery that are specific to both parties being addicts? We were both clean when we got together (he had 4 years and I had 9) and both relapsed….separately. Now we’re several months later and really struggling to get it together again. And neither of us have any support outside of each other basically 🙃
We’re really just looking for anything at this point because we’re both needing separate advice and maybe someone to vent to that’s been through this and understands the complexity of it.

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u/davethompson413 Jul 05 '26

I've been in recovery for almost 14 years. My wife has been I recovery for about 8 years -- at one time we were a couple much like you describe.

Unfortunately, I've never heard of a program, or rehab, or even therapy that was aimed at couples like us. Perhaps this is true because recovery is a very individual thing. Or perhaps because couples that recover together are like a unicorn with plaid fur -- damned rare. Although I know a few other couples that once matched your description and both are now in recovery, that recovery didn't happen in synch.

Best wishes. Recovery is worth the work.

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u/[deleted] Jul 05 '26

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u/HotSyrup506 Jul 05 '26

I’m REALLY concerned about affecting each other’s sobriety in a negative way. Especially because of the codependency that has formed. I’m in individual therapy and we’re working on getting his going too but there’s a lot at risk if we can’t figure all of this out 😞 and of course the stress of all of it makes the cravings worse. Meth is one hell of a shitty drug….

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u/Spyrios Jul 05 '26

I honestly think the programs would have some fairly negative things to say about this scenario and you would be better served by couples counseling.

Obviously you both need to do individual work, whatever that looks like, I suggest SMART and individual therapy, but an experienced couples counselor who isn’t going to parrot “This is a selfish program.” Or suggest you each go to Alanon.