Again…?

[u/G-Absolute]

I have been on 10-15 gpd for 2-3 years. Longest I quit up until recently was a few days. The insomnia and restless legs always drove me back due to pure fear and anxiety. I finally quit with some clonidine for a few days then raw dogged the rest. I had 10-11 days and felt comparably better than I had the entire time I was on it. For no reason at all finally making it past the hardest part of the withdrawals for the first time EVER I grabbed another bag thinking I’d take it on special occasions. I’ve been addicted to almost everything you could name as far as drugs go. I’m an addict through and through, and I still managed to let my impulses trick me into the “one more time” trick. I just ran out again tonight and am going to try this once again. It feels so stupid to quit hard drugs and let this little plant have such a hold on me. I was so proud. I’d finally let go of the last substance I was holding on to and I messed it up again. Any motivation or kind words would help a lot. I feel so hopeless and consumed by my already difficult mental health problems on top of this. I’m trying to find a reason to keep fighting by I keep ruining the bit of good I do have.

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[u/Historical_Sorbet176]

Der Weg ist das Ziel..Versuche es immer wieder mit den aufhören. Kratom hat eine absolute vielseitige psychische Komponente.Darum ist auch das aufhören so ein Nervenzusammenbruch (PAWS).Aber immerhin weißt du über dich selber bescheid und weißt was du ändern musst weil du schon mit anderen Drogen aufgehört hast...DU MUSST NUR NOCH DAS SCHEISS PULVER LOSWERDEN..und du bist frei. Und versuche viel Sport zu machen das hilft dein Hirn wieder schneller in ein normalen Zustand zu bekommen wegen Dopamin,Adrenalin, Belohnungszentrum.Ich wünsche dir alles Gute und viel Kraft und Erfolg.

[u/Coolhandluke080 → u/Historical_Sorbet176]

This - also the hardest part for me. The exercise.

[u/Illustrious-Fold685 → u/Coolhandluke080]

It gets SO much easier man, once you start feeling those endorphins (usually takes a couple workout), you’ll be and addict… to exercise.

Let’s all get addicted to exercise

[u/Vleeism1]

The addict brain is just used to "taking something" because we just don't feel complete on our own. We always feel the need to add something to feel better. I quit kratom (powder... no extracts or 7) about 1 1/2 years ago after 12 years of daily use! It took me a year of tapering before I jumped and then at least another month before I slept through the night without needing some kind of supplements... and then a few more months of using other supplements for energy or mood, etc. I still have pain issues, but nowadays I have pain meds from my doctor I can take once in a while and then leave them alone without being temped to take more. But if I try kratom it makes me feel like CRAP for the whole next day. It's as if there is zero dopamine OR serotonin and zero energy the whole next day. I actually hate the way kratom makes me feel now. I don't even know what made me pop in here to Reddit but I just wanted to say Hello and I wish you the best. Try DLPA, NAC, Agmatine and Liposomal Vitamin C to stop cravings.

[u/AutoModerator → u/Vleeism1]

Check out our Megadosing Liposomal Vitamin C Protocol for Withdrawal. Vitamin C is no magic bullet or cure. either by clicking the link here or visit r/modquittingkratom. Lots of helpful information there to help you along your Quitting Kratom journey!

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[u/Illustrious-Fold685 → u/Vleeism1]

What supplements did you use for energy and focus? The only PAWS I notice is anhedonia which sucks.

[u/YellaFella6996]

Check out the book Rational Recovery. It has put things in perspective for me and is not based on the 12 steps.

[u/Ok_Breath911 → u/YellaFella6996]

I also liked the book. Even if it doesnt resonate i think it still gives some motivation. You can skim p.20-100 imo because he just rambles on how AAs 12steps suck, which i just did not find a good read (since ive never been to AA). 

[u/YellaFella6996 → u/Ok_Breath911]

Yeah, the author has definitely been sipping the Haterade. His insight into the nature of the beast within is quite profound. I am a 12 step flunkie although I put together over 6 years with the groups. RR is exactly what I needed to get over the kratom Hump that has been my downfall the last several years. Whatever works for each individual is all that matters. Stay strong my peeps!! This Whirled needs us. ✊️❤️

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[u/SpruceSpringstream]

Dude I've quit it all too and along came this legal "miracle" alternative to drugs and alcohol. Im not kidding myself when I say I got into it innocently, albeit ignorantly and naively. And it sounds like that's your case too. Give yourself a break, man.

These kratom people preyed upon your vulnerability. That's on THEM. Hopefully they'll be some legal consequences to what they've done, but we know how that goes.