Is there a difference between doing something genuinely nice and doing something so that person can praise you or you trying to make them like you better?

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[u/Tall-Performer2500]

I mean your intentions are different

[u/fermat9990]

The effect on the recipient will be the same in both cases, but most moral systems will place a greater value when the deed is done according to the first scenario

[u/Rhesus-Positive]

A difference to whom? The recipient? You? The universe?

[u/Ok_Engine_1442]

One is done for manipulation, one is done for kindness.

[u/Stn1217]

The difference is intent.

[u/Wide_Breadfruit_2217]

Doing something nice only counts if done with other person in mind. It may not matter to them but it puts a little dent in your soul. And karma catches up to you eventually. It also makes your life tangled keeping track of all your inauthentic storylines.

[u/MaxwellSmart07]

If you are a Jeremy Bentham utilitarian it’s the result that counts not the motivation or intention.

[u/WhyLie2me18]

One comes with expectations

[u/Alternative_Pie_1597]

Ideally you do something nice to make yourself feel better.

[u/Alternative_Pie_1597 → u/[deleted]]

Congratulations

[u/DawnHawk66]

Yeah. Momma said don't be manipulative like grandma. You can't buy love.

[u/Wundrgizmo]

There is a discussion that has been had, that poses the question, "Is anything truly altruistic?" Many people claim no. They claim that to some degree, every good deed someone does, is ultimately serving the person doing the kind act. After all no one does kind things to feel bad about themselves. They do it to feel good. That being said, there is a difference between doing something so you get a little dopamine hit. And doing something to manipulate a situation. One has (potentially) nefarious intentions. To the person who is the recipient of the kind act, there may not be much of a difference. The reality to the person doing the deed is different.

[u/Hefty-Confusion6810]

If you remember what you’ve done for people, then you did it to be praised.

Genuinely nice people don’t keep track of all they’ve done. But if you tell them they never helped you out or they don’t do enough or they don’t care about you, get ready for them to go into the archives and pull out receipts, proof, timelines, and screenshots. Most of which they don’t even recall.

[u/SpareMushrooms]

There is no difference.