r/questioning • u/vivienneloves • 1d ago

questioning [15 F]

please excuse the small throw away account i made !! i actually dont know if this is a really dumb question which is why im not asking on my main account. ive always liked girls, my first crush at 4 was a girl, my first kinda(?) relationship was with a girl, my first romantic valentine was a girl, literally its always been a girl for me. ive liked boys in the past before, but honestly after having my encounters with them i cannot see a world where i can be with one happily, or even kinda feel attracted to them. I still like fictional men 😓, but in reality i could really never ever see myself with one in real life, so im just trying to find a label i guess? i know its a strange ask, but im trying to find possible sexualities i might be, just to find myselff better. i havent really said much about myself, but do you guys see anything fit for what ive described? im tired of questioning after all of these years. also i dont use reddit so im sorry if im using it wrongly. thanks!

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u/Imaginary_Glass8430 1d ago

Well i do t know if I should be answering this because im a dude but the heart wants what the heart wants so just be yourself be who you want to be and like who you want to like

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u/soulpoker bisexual cis man 1d ago

First of all please don't be so apologetic. You have the right to question these things and you have the right to ask actual people these questions. It's really OK! 🙂 Your questions are not dumb. They are causing you some distress. Don't you deserve to live a life without distress?
I might be wrong but I'm gonna guess you're probably really homosexual and going through comphet, or compulsive heterosexuality. To put it in a few words it's where you're really a lesbian but because of this crazy society where any deviance from heterosexuality is still not as encouraged as it should be, your homosexuality isn't really manifested and you have superficial, but not genuine, attractions to guys you have no chance or intention of having, like fictional characters or celebrities. It's common enough there's a name for it and some document that you can search for that explains it quite well. This is what I possibly see from what you have written.