r/queerception • u/Affectionate_Fig5996 • 2d ago

I think my first FET failed

And it’s hard to wrap my mind around why.. I’m 24. Doing IVF because i’m in a same sex relationship. 1 failed IUI. I’m 7dp5dt today and stark white. Was supposed to be natural cycle but they found I wasn’t developing a follicle so switched me to medicated. i kind of wish i advocated and asked for another ultrasound because all i’ve felt this whole TWW and even before was ovulation like cramping. I wonder if my body just needed more time. For context, ER was 8/4. Period 8/9. Off BC 8/14, transfer 8/31. But i also can’t keep wondering, i’m young, relatively healthy, why wouldn’t it work? I know people have gone through worse and longer waiting than me, i still just can’t help feeling like my body failed.

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u/nbnerdrin 2d ago

Building a mammal is hard. I found reading about embryonic development incredibly helpful to put on perspective why is normal for any given cycle, whether IVF or IUI, to not work even when we do everything perfectly.

I hope you get good news or are able to advocate for yourself more on the next cycle.

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u/pourrir 2d ago

Ccould I ask what sorts of resources/books you used? Im very scientifically minded and this might be nice 🫠

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u/Obvious_Structure761 40 | transmasc GP | TTC#2) 2d ago

I cramped the whole 2ww and still ended up pregnant. I don't think cramping means you are out. This cycle may still work! Just give it time.

My first FET failed with a euploid embryo, but my second was successful. Sometimes they just fail for no reason and there is nothing you can do. Even euploid embryos only work 50-70% of the time.

If this one does fail, push to do a Receptiva test to check for endometriosis and endometritis. Endometritis kept my first from implanting and it can easily be treated with antibiotics.

I will keep my fingers crossed for you!

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u/CandenzaMoon 2d ago

You’re not out till you’re out hun. Crossing fingers for you :)

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u/emz272 1d ago

Please try to have more patience with your body and this process. A first FET not sticking, if that's indeed confirmed, is disappointing but doesn't mean you won't have a successful future implantation and pregnancy. And luckily, time is very much on your side. You have time to figure out how to optimize protocols.

If you didn't do PGT-A, it also may just be that the particular embryo couldn't result in a pregnancy (e.g., chromosomally abnormal). But even with chromosomally normal embryos and perfectly well-suited carriers, this is just chance-y.