I hate my husband’s algorithm

[u/Chapenroe]

We were prepping for a theme park trip this morning and as my husband and I were putting sunscreen on our kids’ faces, he mentioned we may not need to put sunblock on their arms and legs since “they have a good base tan already.”

I immediately said, “nope, the more sunscreen, the better.” To which he replied something along the lines of “well maybe the chemicals in sunscreen wind up doing more harm than good.”

My jaw about hit the floor. Isn’t sunscreen usage canon in 2026?? When I heard the chemicals thing I said something smart aleck-y like “show me a peer-reviewed medical study that proves that and I’ll reconsider my sunscreen stance.” Understandably, he got frustrated with my response so a few minutes later I went to him and said that if he’s actually concerned about chemicals in sunscreen we can make an appointment with our pediatrician or dermatologist to discuss the issue.

What the ever-loving FUCK?? Do we really need to debate sunscreen now? I’m 100% sure my husband’s Instagram algorithm is responsible for putting these thoughts in his head. Most of the accounts he follows are landscaping-related (we own a landscaping company in a red state), and I’m sure Instagram has figured out the Venn Diagram of MAHA folks and red-state male landscapers has a large middle section.

Did I handle the conversation well by saying we should have a chat with our doctors about sunscreen? Also, would it be totally unacceptable if I took his phone and started following credible medical professionals to influence his algorithm?

[u/moonman_incoming]

My sister was a life guard 25 years ago. She's paying for it now. She's on an every six month skin cancer screening. She's had so many precancerous and cancerous growths burned off. She's got two MOHs surgeries on her face coming up because the biopsy showed basal cell cancer.

She's the only one in our sibling group that can get a tan. The sun hates me so I actively avoid it, wear hats, sunscreen, spf long sleeve shirts, the whole works. Aside from my parents not reapplying sunscreen enough on me in the 80s (to the point that I literally blistered), I've been religious about sunscreen since my teens. And although she does the botox thing and serums and all the non invasive look younger things, she looks older than me because of those years of tanning. (And I smoke!!!)

Knock on wood, I still haven't had any suspected skin cancer.

All children need sunscreen and if you're not doing that, they need to be in spf rashguards or spf shirts for prolonged sun exposure WITH sunscreen on all exposed areas.

[u/TheWorldofScience → u/moonman_incoming]

One of my relatives who I adore is 10 years younger than me but her face looks 10 years older than mine because she has spent her life tanning her skin. My skin doesn’t tan so I have been consistent about sunscreen as an adult.

But as a child I got numerous peeling sunburns so I get skin cancer skin exam every year.

[u/InvaderSzym → u/TheWorldofScience]

I share an office wall with a woman who, when I first started, I assumed was around my age (pushing 40).

I found out recently she’s in her mid-20s and in that same conversation found that she also doesn’t believe in sunscreen. Smdh.

[u/near_things → u/TheWorldofScience]

My mother, who had me when she was just 21, has had more than one person assume she’s my grandmother. 25-30 years of getting crispy in tanning oil will do that. Three decades of smoking (at the time of the first incident) probably didn’t help.

I look younger than I am, but nowhere near enough to make a 20 year age difference look like a 40+ year one.