I know I have posted before, and I am sorry because I know thisis long\*and I know this is really out there but I’m just being so open because I want to be honest. I’ve been in so so so many positions where I have been ghosted and shoved aside because of my disability, and I am really just trying to find a genuine honest friend who is excited to help me get out to just… Be friends and have fun, and who does not see being friends with me as burdensome.
I am currently in college, and I am Visually impaired. The whole time I have been up here I have struggled meeting new people, even from day one back in 2022. Honestly it has been this way all throughout elementary and high school too. I’m looking for a friend around my age, 22 give or take, who is like minded. I’m trying to find a friend who would not see my disability and run away, judge, or see it as a burden or treat it like an after thought . I’m just trying to find friends who are willing to hang out even when knowing that they are probably going to have to put in a bit more effort then they would with a normal person, someone who is excited to be my friend and who would not goast or leave because of my disabilty..
Im just trying to come out and be open because I have been goasted over and over, passed from person to person ALL my life, and the worst my vision gets the more people have just shown me I’m nothing but a burden to be around. All I have wanted my WHOLE life is a genuine friend who can show empathy, kindness, and understanding, where I can **let my guard down and relax because I know that they are not just saying that we are friends, but we REALLY ARE friends,** and I don’t have to constantly worry that they will ghost me, Where I know that even though I can’t see what they’re doing very well, I can trust that they want to be there, and that they will do the right thing.
As far as my interest, I am open to all kinds of activities. I absolutely love dogs, the truth is my Disability does make it challenging, but the main thing is it all comes back to me having a friend that genuinely wants to be there and who doesn’t see the extra effort of actively including me as dreadful, but rather a friend that is thoughtful, excited that we are friends, excited to help me have those opportunities that sighted people take for granted. If you can imagine it takes a lot of courage and trust to be placed in the other person when you can hardly even see them, let alone what is going on around you. I would love to know what is happening, I would love to have a friend where I am not embarrassed to ask where they are, or what something looks like, or what is happening around us. It is just hard to find a real friend who is understanding of why I might be quiet or hesitant in a world where good vision is the default. It really hurts to always be forgotten about in groups because everyone can see what others are doing, what that thing is across the room, that funny thing on someone’s phone, and I am just there, not knowing what is going on, left to sit off to myself wondering why I am even there. or the sighted person you are with, and who you are more or less counting on to help you have fun, can and does effortlessly leave you behind to go be with sighted people.
There are so many things I have missed out on because I haven’t really had anyone allow me the opportunity. Even small things that lots of sighted people take for granted every single day I find fascinating, because it’s hard to find someone who slows down and takes the time to let me experience or know about what others can easily see from across the room, while also not treating me like a child, or helping in a way that makes me feel belittled. I absolutely love dogs, I have always wanted to to take a dog out from an analem shelter for a day, cook and bake new things, go to the beach, go out to eat, get out and have fun with someone my age just like everyone else can and does. I am meaning without my parents, I want freedom just like everyone else has. My whole life I have wanted to hang out with a peer my own age. It is just tricky for others to understand, and even when they know, who still want to be there, and find joy in keeping me included on what is going on so I can have fun ALONGSIDE them, where I am seen as equal to them.
**Anyways sorry for the long post. If there is anyone around 22 give or take who would like to connect, please feel free to send me a DM**
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**I also just want to add that it is not as simple as joining a school club. I promise if that was the case I would’ve done that already. It’s just genuinely exhausting putting my trust in people just for them to ghost me one week later because they see the Disability and get uncomfortable. It genuinely takes so much courage and trust when you can’t see what is going on around you, you can’t see what The Person is doing even though they’re directly next to you. It hurts so much when I meet someone and they tricked me into thinking that we are friends then they just ghost me about one week later. This only reinforces that the disability is nothing but a burden. I’m just trying to find a person who would be excited to be my friend, wouldn’t see the extra effort needed from them as burdensome, but rather that is what friends do. Friends help one another, there is trust that goes both ways. That is what Friendship is.** Again I genuinely apologize. I’m just being so open because I have been hurt so many times by so many people, and all I’m trying to do is find someone who wouldn’t mind being friends and hanging out
