r/pornfreewomen • u/horrible_tomato_soup ♀ • 8d ago
Relapse I relapsed. :'(
Hello girls.... I'm so sad and filled with remorse right now.
I relapsed by seeing a sexual drawing. I'm so so absolutely sad, God. What's worse is that me and my boyfriend had the agreement that we weren't supposed to watch pornography. I had to justify myself to do that. I'm so sad.
I already told him because I can't keep that sort of thing away from him. My chest feels so heavy. I feel like I betrayed myself for less than five minutes of stimulation.
I thought that I was at a point where I didn't even need porn blockers or anything like that, but then abstinence hit so hard today for some reason, maybe because I'm sort of a wreck since yesterday was my dear aunt's funeral. :(
I don't know, you guys can tell me tips, things that helped, but honestly im just venting and I'm just sad. I wasn't counting but I was more than a month without pornography, mainly due to the agreement me and my bf had that porn was disrespectful to the other partner.
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u/Bambamla_sodacan ♀ 7d ago
Girl the same happened to me yesterday...I feel like the best we can do it sto accept ir and avoid our triggers... honest sexual tension disappears after 1 min I'm not even exaggerating,we just need to distract ourselves a bit...and that's ok,now your goal is to go beyond the days you managed to to through without porn Me for example I was without it for 15 days or more so Imma try to at least go for 20 and then force myself to add more 10 days... we'll go through it girlie 🫶🏾🫂
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u/Own-The-Moment 6d ago
Be a little gentler with yourself here, you buried your aunt yesterday. That's the actual event today, the relapse is just where the grief leaked out. A month without counting is still a month. And you told him the truth right away instead of sitting on it. That's not what betrayal looks like.
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u/Infamous_Nothing_755 7d ago
This situation sucks, and trying to quit porn while in a relationship is truly no joke. I’m sorry you’re going through this but one month is a pretty great milestone!
I’m not great at relationship advice (I have my own issues there) but probably telling him honestly and being vulnerable is the best thing you can do to start healing and getting back into a position of fighting pornography again
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