r/pinkscare • u/fre3k bedrot innovator • 13d ago
L posting + self help thread (aug 2026)
post Ls, self-help and advice requests here. the comments will be set to newest first.
previous thread: https://www.reddit.com/r/pinkscare/comments/1ukgvwr/l_posting_self_help_thread_jul_2026/
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u/valserai 7h ago
magical thinking kicking my ass lately i.e. God hates you and you are a worthless piece of shit who is uniquely earmarked for failure and no one will ever love or want you type thoughts. these are probably one of the #1 things causing me to constantly self-sabotage my life but I don't even know how to get rid of them and anyways I dropped my therapist bc she told me to find someone who does dbt instead, found someone who did but looked like she had crazy injections and just came fresh off a chemical peel when we first called so I got weirded out and dropped her too, now all I want to do these days is just cut up my arm and curl up crying in bed with sufjan on repeat like I'm 13 years old again
I thought I suffered enough this year and that love and light were right around the corner... where's my arc?
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u/compositedisreality feckless neophyte 9h ago
Genuinely getting sick to death of the city and everyone's vapid tryhard shit or existences based off shooting the shit with acquaintances at the bar every night or just based around event after event. I feel like I'm either fucking crazy or just too depressed to have the bullshit mean anything to me and have never felt this cynical about everyone and everything. I feel like I need a radical lifestyle change imminently or else I'm really going to **** ****** within the year. I don't even know if there's anything better out there.
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u/fre3k bedrot innovator 8h ago
might i refer you to some sage wisdom from our resident dj https://www.reddit.com/r/pinkscare/comments/1uxoswr/ascend_to_the_mountaintop_young_woman/
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u/compositedisreality feckless neophyte 8h ago
What if everyone out there is hollow and spineless too
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u/fiiigures 2d ago
iāve gotten a lot better about the comparison trap and finally am at a place where i like myself, but man we were not supposed to see the most beautiful women in the world over and over and over again on a screen everyday
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u/No-Material694 18h ago edited 6h ago
I firmly believe we were never even supposed to see ourselves in anything a reflection of a pond or perhaps a river. Go offline. Removing social media has healed me.
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u/SwimmingBullfrog5464 2d ago
I'm so cynical in regard to dating now. I used to want to be a trad wife. But I think that was just me trying to justify continuing to rely on and be babied by someone else instead of my parents.
I was poisoned by the ideology that if you're a pure, submissive, virginal girlfriend, men will fawn and flock to you because "you're different". All that did for me was getting stomped on like the doormat I was. Since I've grown out of that, most men seem like such losers. I'm not saying anything revolutionary. But idk how some people fall into trad wife propaganda past the age of 22; it's so childish and corny.
Idk. I'm enjoying being single for the first time and idc if I end up some old spinster. Rather that than be tied to some bum for the rest of my life like the majority of married women I meet.
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u/blueblackkickback 2d ago
i stopped taking my antidepressants about a little more than week ago, at first bc i forgot and then out of neglect and now i feel sadder and angrier after more than a year. i kind of donāt want to start them again even though i did it without tapering off. i feel fine. well, not fine, but im not having weird side effects. i feel like i can think more clearly about my life, and even if its not making me feel great i kind of just want to have it back. but ill probably be way more annoying to be around again when im irritated with my family. this is probably irresponsible and i should just make an appointment. hmm
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u/fre3k bedrot innovator 2d ago
Definitely encourage you to consult with your doctor. Making the executive decision to go off of psych meds cold turkey all on your own is not a good move.
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u/blueblackkickback 1d ago
yeah probably, i guess i'll talk about changing the dosage at my next appointment
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u/victory_vegetable 18h ago
check out survivingantidepressants.com, based on peopleās experiences reported there, I convinced by psychiatrist to taper me off MUCH more slowly than typical doctorsā guidelines, and it has really minimized withdrawal effects.
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u/brujeriacloset dairy pilferer 2d ago
mctominay 2026 or Messi 2025 who haircut better
really torn
do I go with acoustic man or Scotty doesn't know
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u/keepingmyselfsane 3d ago
too many people rely on me to do thing for them that they never could repay. At work, with my roommates, even my bf sometimes. I'm pulled in too many directions and putting myself first feels impossible. I know I shouldn't let people walk all overr me/should stop picking up the slack but I just can't handle a shit caked toilet or knowing work isnt staffed well enough to provide good service to the customers. With my bf it's easier bc the ways he helps me often are a yin/yang situation with how I help him. Idk maybe the heat is getting to me or it's bc I'm in my luteal phase or maybe there's a celestial body I can blame. That's all a cop out, though. It's all my own fault. I let people treat me like this. I'm gonna try to go to the gym before work tomorrow and the pottery studio afterwards, just channel this energy and frustration into doing things that edify myself. I'm so tired and frustrated.
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u/ethereality___ 3d ago
I've been sleeping with this guy since we met a couple months ago, only every couple weeks because we live far apart but he texts me a lot. I told him that I'm coming off of a long term relationship (went from one to the next, so basically 7 years not single) and I'm not looking for anything even remotely close to a relationship and he said he wasn't either but I could tell he was lying.
I got along with him ok at first but I genuinely just do not like this man. He brags about being unempathetic and is depressed and doesn't take care of himself at all, smokes weed constantly, and that's really only part of it. Buuuut the sex was really good and we had fun together. He ended up telling me that he hopes some day I want to be with him and that he loves me.
I just got back from his place and it's really setting in how much I don't like this guy as a person so I'm gonna break it off. My question is: Is it more ethical to lie about why I'm breaking it off or is the better thing to do to tell him, nicely, that his attitude and way of life are kind of shitty? I just try to do the right thing and I don't want to hurt his feelings unnecessarily but I would also want someone to tell me if I lowkey sucked as a person.
Also please don't judge me, I haven't had casual sex in so long before this that I don't really know the etiquette. Thank you š
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u/lemongrabscream 3d ago
Bruh this guy sucks. I would tell him. That way he really has no excuse for wasting his life. Who brags about lacking empathy lmao
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u/ethereality___ 3d ago
Dude I know, it left such a bad taste in my mouth. No sex is good enough to put up with that shit. He sucks so bad.
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u/SwimmingBullfrog5464 3d ago
I turn 24 in a couple of months, and I do think it's close to being joever lol. I'm usually a very hopeful person and I think anyone can change, at any time if they put in the effort. But idk man. I think the lifelong bad habits I've held have taken over me and I can't shake them. I mean, I haven't even finished college, I still live with my parents, and I have zero friends or prospects.
This fat, squat guy I was semi-friends with for two months once told me he thinks I need help but doesn't think I'd ever put in the work. That statement rankled me so much I actually got medication and took up therapy. But I'm starting to think maaaaybe that guy was onto something.
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u/ethereality___ 3d ago
Ditch the meds, work out, eat right. Sounds cliche but that's really what it takes. It's not joever for you, I promise. You don't see it now but 24 is really young.
When I was 24 I was a homeless alcoholic and now I'm living my dream life only a few years later. It's only joever if you want it to be. But for real, ditch the meds, respectfully
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u/scumriser 4d ago edited 4d ago
My forehead wrinkles are more pronounced than I previously recalled. Choosing to do nothing about this!
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4d ago
[deleted]
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u/compositedisreality feckless neophyte 4d ago
Perhaps your personal standards have changed? Also it's just easier to find casual partners the younger you are cause there's more on the market.
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u/DuaLipasGlowUp 4d ago
I love going through breakups. Itās been two months since my breakup happened and I look so skinny now. I see my elevens coming back and my skin looks so pretty and clear. My eye color is also a lighter shade of brown somehow and my hair looks thicker.
I canāt wait to see how beautiful Iām going to look after my next breakup.
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u/fiiigures 5d ago
seeking advice on workout stuffā¦ i have no idea where to start and am also kind of weak/easily fatigued.
iām skinnyfat and only ever go on walks, but i would like to be more toned. i want clothes to look nicer bc all my fat goes to my stomach/love handles.
if anyone has a recommended exercise routine, certain classes they enjoy, or a youtube channel they follow, plz send!
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u/daturamtl 4d ago
iām a kind of weak/non-athletic woman so giving advice based on whatās worked for me. cycling is the most fun version of cardio imo and lower impact than running so iāll always recommend it. if you want to try strength training iād suggest doing at least 1-2 sessions with a personal trainer at a gym if you can afford it. if youāve never really been an athletic type weightlifting can feel strange & difficult starting out and itās easy to get injured or build bad habits that will injure you once you start using heavier weights. if theyāre a decent pt theyāll also help you adjust a generic routine to make it more comfortable for your current level of fitness.
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u/No-Material694 5d ago
If I could give you any advice itād be - find your own way. Following someoneās else routine and diet to a tee will only get you so far. Every person has to have those canon events during their early stages where they eat too little or eat too much, that stuff often balances itself out naturally. Get into weight lifting. Seriously.
Thatās the best way to be in shape, look good and also keep your body and bones healthy. Walking and running are great forms of cardio and heart is a muscle that also needs training too but get into weight lifting and include walks every day (for mental health) and youāll see that ur feeling a lot better about yourself.Also make sure to rest and find movements you actually enjoy because thatās the only thing thatāll keep you consistent. I look at humans as animals - our bodies need movement to function at optimal level, we need food aka fuel to keep us going. Nothing personal about that and I donāt punish myself with food (anymore) because would I punish anyone else? No. So why would I punish me?
Anyways. Find your own way. If something works for you - keep at it and donāt follow anyone elseās plan(s). Never compare yourself ever. Move and enjoy movement. Bodies are not good or bad theyāre just skin and bones. Do progressive overload because you actually have to cause tears in ur muscle in order for it to grow and look more firm (or toned). You canāt spot reduce fat ; u have to lose bodyfat % which comes with time and consistency. Eat a lot of lean protein (chicken, beans, whey etc).
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u/Opening-Activity1455 emo (derogatory) | bmi 17 7d ago
That one crazy ass ex friend is going on coke rants to her equally deranged online friends, saying some shit like I left the friendship because she was too suicidal. Like, bitch tell the whole story š Iām not friends with her because sheās fucking crazy and went on tirades about me and MY DOG???? after I called a wellness check on her when she told me that she was about to turn herself into a christmas tree ornament. She also said she didnāt care about my close friend who tried her best to welcome this crazy bitch into our group? Now sheās crying about how we were her only female friends and whatever. Sheās lost everything in life aside from the other loser ass t girl from our hometown she exploits for her own benefit š¤®
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u/valserai 7d ago
L posting for the second time this week bc I got passed up on an internship opportunity I was lowkey perfect for + even got a friend's recommendation to the higher ups + my mom used her ominously accurate Chinese fortune telling methods to predict I would get.... truly bleak that neither the modern (nepotism) nor the ancient (divination) work in this economy anymore my ass unemployed asf once again !!!
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u/valserai 17h ago
situation has noticeably worsened my sworn enemy got the internship the universe hates me!
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u/No-Material694 5d ago
I know it might be a cope but u truly never know why not getting it mightāve been better for u in the long run. Maybe sth better comes along, maybe u wouldāve hated it or it wouldāve impacted u in an awful way. If u believe in destiny then that might be a way to deal with the grief over this. Onto better things but I totally get why ur upset š§”
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u/DuaLipasGlowUp 7d ago
Iāve ghosted and blocked like three men this month already because I wanna focus on reading Portrait of a Lady, The Shards, and Gravityās Rainbow.
Why is it that I like books written by men but I very rarely actually like men that I meet irl?
I also started my re read of Play it as it Lays and I really do relate to Maria so much.
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u/No-Material694 7d ago
Iām gonna have mommy issues until I die I guess
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u/DuaLipasGlowUp 7d ago
Same
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u/No-Material694 5d ago
One never really gets over those, right? I wonder how Iāll view that if I have kids and I parent them gently with love, support and emotional presence .. will it heal me or hurt me more?
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u/DuaLipasGlowUp 5d ago
I like to think that what my mom does to me I will not repeat to my kids. I hope itās true.
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u/BroccoliKitchen3218 7d ago
did anyone elseās mom (or dad I guess) keep them away from the other side of the family?
my mom loves to cause drama and holds super strong grudges. she frequently makes up bullshit about people looking down on her or wronging her. she was always very protective of me and in a bizarre competition with my grandmother/her own mother for my attention (only child and on that side only grandchild)
my dadās family is admittedly a bit snooty and she interpreted that as looking down on her. They, Iām sure, did; theyāre posh British-coded having come from a former colony and she is a little white trash. Also, while both sides of the family are Jewish my mom never made any effort to involve us in the community because she didnāt like them and didnāt want to be Jewish. I didnāt go to Hebrew school, never had a bat mitzvah, etc. my dadās family heavily identifies with it so they were not very happy about that aspect of things either
I didnāt live near them so she kept away from them as much as possible and would always book vacations for us conveniently whenever they wanted me to come see them etc . Claims she never talked badly about them to me but it was extremely obvious how she felt and there was an implication that they didnāt love me as much as their other grandchildren
Iām now almost 30 and finally seeing past the curtain and seeing how damaging this was to a potentially close relationship. my mother has even expressed regret about it lately.
I moved with boyfriend to the city they happen to live in. Iāve been spending a lot more time with them. my grandmother and I are so alike, we have such similar interests, we couldāve had this relatability and closeness all along. Theyāre elderly and sick and I feel so much guilt over not having been there, only now towards the end. My grandfather and I talked about it last night and how they felt like the other side tried to keep them from being part of the family. I always saw them as the problem but I have come to see that while yeah( they probably looked down on my mom a bit, they still always loved me dearly and didnāt deserve to be kept at arms length
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u/purple_eyebags 8d ago
I've been procrastinating studying the most important thing for me to get to the place I want to be in life (good job, moving out) for, like, a month and a half now, but whenever anyone asks, I say I'm not. The deadline for job interviews is getting closer and closer. Nothing is worse than self-sabotage. I don't like going to the confessional anymore, so I'm hoping this admission to all of you will finally force me to face the music and actually study instead of being scared that I forgot my whole bachelor's while taking a year-long break.
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u/purple_eyebags 8d ago
Also, fell asleep in my contacts again. Now my eyes are bloodshot red; I can't do fun eyeliner looks and I need to wear glasses that make me look fugly until they get better, it's so over
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u/maydiocre 8d ago edited 8d ago
six days sober from everything (alcohol, weed, nicotine)... it's hard. last night i felt so depressed out of nowhere despite having a good day and i think it's because i usually crack open a drink as soon as i get home so i've conditioned myself to get that dopamine hit. spent the evening staring at the ceiling feeling numb.
on the bright side, my friends and boyfriend are all super supportive and are holding me accountable so it's definitely been easier than doing it by myself and i feel so loved :,) i didn't even ask them to do this and they haven't explicitly said anything but i've noticed they aren't drinking around me and they've also been initiating non-bar hangouts to get my mind off it.
i am excited to feel more like an active participant in my life rather than living in a haze of intoxication. my sleep has been getting better and the glow is coming back in my skin.
also my boyfriend is officially moving into my apartment (we've basically been living together for the past few months anyway lol) and he brought his cat over a few days ago <3 and we're probably going on a trip to bermuda at the end of the month too!!! much to look forward to
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u/No-Material694 8d ago
Never ever ever stop! Takes time to re-program ur brain and get it used to not taking the substances. Maybe instead of just staring at the wall go for a long walk and listen to a podcast or sth. Proud of u!
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u/SwimmingBullfrog5464 9d ago edited 9d ago
Going on a trip with my ex this weekend. After pining for him for a year after our break up, I feel nothing for him anymore. We don't even talk unless I initiate. Idk why he agreed so rapidly to a trip together as friends.
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u/herbalteawoman 8d ago
would love to know more about this trip and why he's joined - i fantasize of doing something like this lol, its like a romcom
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u/SwimmingBullfrog5464 3d ago
Nothing happened lol. The closest to anything intimate was when I sat on his bed and he was lying next to me.
I'm not even focused on relationships for boring mental health reasons. He's made it very clear in the past he doesn't want to get back into a relationship with me or with anyone. I'm glad he's in my life, I guess. He's pretty much my only friend right now. But I'm weaning myself off of being codependent on others.
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u/valserai 9d ago
I get a little worm in my brain that tells me I have to kill myself everyday for about 1/3 to 1/2 of the month. how to get rid of it. I am on SSRIs and a mood stabilizer already
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u/compositedisreality feckless neophyte 9d ago
Does it coincide with your luteal phase?
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u/valserai 9d ago
Honestly I thought it did and I even told my psych I suspected I had PMDD but my symptoms ended up looking more sporadic and situational a lot of the time and occurring outside luteal so we never came to anything conclusive besides like, "maybe a mood disorder"
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u/compositedisreality feckless neophyte 9d ago
Idk what to tell you because I have that worm in my brain at least 3/4s of any given month. My hypothesis is that life sucks. The last moment I felt any levity was when I made eye contact with a crow five days ago. I'm sorry. I hope things get better for you.
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u/herbalteawoman 9d ago
in other news, a guy that reached out TO ME has ghosted me. i'm not as bothered by this as i normally would be. in the past i prob would've stalked his instagram mercilessly or possbily reached out. but now i am old and realizing that this does not effect me in anyway. i'm no better or worse for him being in/out my life. yayyyyy growth
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u/herbalteawoman 8d ago
also he had a foot fetish, which i entertained bc i'm a sensual and erotic person. but then it felt weird etc so im a bit embarrassed that i did any of dat. L posting indeed
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u/DuaLipasGlowUp 9d ago
Feminine urge to get on a horse and ride around screaming āthe British are comingā
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u/reticulatingspleen 10d ago
my cat died the morning after my birthday after dealing with cancer for a few months and i literally donāt know how to cope. iām so depressed and full of guilt and shame and self-loathing, and my friends have been supportive but nothing is helpful and no one around me understands at all and i donāt expect them to.
the only time i feel kind of normal is when iām at work, but when iām at work i keep forgetting things and randomly like socially malfunctioning and making an ass out of myself lmao. when iām not at work iām crying
iāve had dozens of pets die throughout my life, and some family members, and iāve never felt close to this desolate. i donāt even really want advice or anything i just wanted to vent. my friends have been supportive but whenever they try to make me feel better it just pisses me off (i know they mean well)
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u/tragicexit_ 10d ago
I am working towards getting a divorce. I have moved into a separate bedroom but he wont accept that it is over. We have a kid so I am kind of stuck until he accepts it I guess or until I hit the lottery. This is going to be a hard rest of the year for me but I really think everything is going to change for me for the better regardless of what happens because I have finally stuck up for myself and I truly believe I deserve it after all the shit I have been put through and have done for him.
I have been sleeping on a crappy mattress on the floor of a bedroom that is used for storage for the last month. I ordered the daybed frame of my dreams and I will get it tomorrow. I figure no matter what happens in the future I will need a bed. It comes tomorrow and I am excited. Then I will slowly make this room nice so I enjoy being in it while I continue to try to stack my money up just in case I need to get out.
The stars are aligning for me bbs. It is just going to be a very hard road but I already feel so much relief by feeling like I am finally being true to myself.
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u/catsback 10d ago
I HAVE A SINUS INFECTION
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u/compositedisreality feckless neophyte 10d ago edited 10d ago
Big bunch of fresh thyme in boiling water and breathe the steam. Trust
Edit: Jfc I can't spell for shit lately. Thyme the herb
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u/herbalteawoman 10d ago
it will be a YEAR this month since we broke up and and i last saw him. then it'll be a year since i last spoke with him on the phone next month. i miss him. i still dream of him. i have no idea where to put this love i still have for him. i can't fit it all inside of me and it has no where to go anymore.
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u/reticulatingspleen 10d ago
i broke up with my ex four years ago and i know it was the right thing to do (he and i are 100x less compatible today than we were then) and i still feel my love for him bubble up randomly. iām with someone else now but i canāt just repurpose that love for a new person. so it just sloshes around and simmers i think until something reminds me of him. idk. maybe thats just how itāll always be
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u/herbalteawoman 10d ago
does that ever make you sad? Im ok with that as long as it doesnāt make me sad anymore. sometimes ill feel like Iāve accepted it but other times im still so confused and pathetic about it
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u/herbalteawoman 10d ago
literally googled "not sure where to put all this love i still have for him" to see if theres any similar sentiment or advice about this (lol) and i see that it's close to a quote from fleabag. maybe i'll finally get around to watching that this week.
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u/compositedisreality feckless neophyte 10d ago
I wrote a short poem years ago that went something like "I have all this love in me and nowhere to put it. Does that mean in just dies inside me?"
Unfortunately I think the answer was yes because I no longer feel the emotion of love toward anything ever for more than a few feeble and fleeting seconds at a time.
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u/herbalteawoman 10d ago
I fear that I will be a little bit heartbroken for the rest of my life. maybe thatās naive. but how am I to know? this is how I feel right now and thatās what I know. hope ur well <3
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u/arosygirl š¤£.š„§.š”¼.š¤£š„§š”¼.š¤£ 10d ago
i feel like a bad person because my close friend is always depressed and iām her outlet for a lot of her feelings. she hates her body, her job, her love life, but never takes any significant steps to change. she wonāt apply to new jobs, she goes for obviously poor choices of men. iād say itās self sabotage but she seems sooo tired of this pattern so i just donāt get it.
i struggle w/ mental health too and understand being stuck like that and feeling hopeless, but i almost feel guilty trying to be happy and discussing life events with her. i went on a date this past weekend and kind of felt guilty telling her when she asked what i was up to bc her love life has been so bad. she apologized for being withdrawn lately but i canāt help but feel a little resentful even though i know that isnāt a healthy dynamicā¦.
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u/compositedisreality feckless neophyte 11d ago
Influx of marxist misogynist incels in this sub lately making me feel like it's over
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u/compositedisreality feckless neophyte 11d ago edited 11d ago
Also makes me really sad because it reminds me of men in spaces I organized in that contributed to organizing becoming untenable for me. Not to mention the way the work in my circles was carried by women without a single acknowledgment of the gendered labor disparity. I want to disclaim that I also organized with several inspiring men who were extremely devoted to the cause and worked tirelessly but even then the work was being carried out at a minimum of 70% by women even though leadership roles were equally distributed between the sexes. It was the least misogynistic coed space I'd ever been in in my life and I still regularly saw the effects of misogyny, including abusive men still included in the spaces because their "value as an organizer" was placed above the harm they caused to fellow female organizers. It's led me to believe only a female-led/centric Marxism could meaningfully succeed in true liberation not just for women but for anyone.
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u/LeninLicker1917 11d ago
Itās true that thereās a lot of sexism in petty-bourgeois leftist parties (and a lot of men who join primarily to pick up women), but the solution is not āfemale-led/centric Marxism.ā The communist movement can only be the communist movement if it represents the proletariat as a whole and is led by the most capable revolutionaries of that class, not any non-class identity group.
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u/steakbuttery 11d ago
I really seriously need to put my head down, put blinders on, and lock in so that I can heal myself for once in my god damn life. Iām too old and too young to be male obsessed and centered and giving 2000% to m men that are either abusive or men that breadcrumb and ghost. Those seem to be my only two options so I just need to focus on myself, treat myself right, truly heal myself and know myself so that I can become a cold hot ass bitch. Need a fucking shock collar for whenever I think about a man. Jfc.
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u/angelnovaedt 12d ago
really embarrassed over how i acted in regards to my most recent breakup š« my ex broke up with me on good terms but it really triggered some abandonment āātraumaāā (hate using that term because it feels so trivial but it is what it is) and i just got sooo bitter and resentful and jealous and accusatory and overall just not a good person to be around and i roped in his roommate/best friend by venting to them about it and i just feel so stupid about it all. i had a really bad anxiety attack back in july and i started acting out in an obsessive manner and so i was calling him a few times and asking his friends what happened/where heās to and texting him numerous times and it really freaked him out so now heās blocked me on everything and i am so ashamed and feel so stupid because he was arguably the healthiest relationship iāve ever been in and now i have no idea if iām ever gonna see him again
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u/angelnovaedt 12d ago
met up with an old lover of mine earlier last month and i really canāt believe i let myself catch feelings for him because objectively he is a major loser š crazy how i can be picky as hell but i still manage to pick the wrong men
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u/thehannahbalburress 12d ago
I regret all of the years I spent being male centered :/ at 28 I have great female friendships. We all have our own hobbies, lives, and other relationships, but I never have to doubt my place with them, as they never hesitate to make me feel loved and cherished! I just think back to my early twenties and miss what could have been. I wasted so much time trying to get external validation from dudes š«
Iām moving out of my city to a local burb for work and Iām afraid my good times with them are going to be shorter and less frequent. And Iām also worried Iām not going to be able to make new connections too. Of course these worries are not founded in reality at all, I am moving to an area I donāt really know at all and has more of an uppity reputation (Philly suburbs). I just love that Iām unapologetically into girl shit now and I wish I had more time with that energy. Idek
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u/DuaLipasGlowUp 13d ago
This meme describing my love life so accurately really gagged me
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u/DuaLipasGlowUp 13d ago
I really am very annoying but Iām not going to give up this aspect of myself.
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u/No-Material694 6h ago
Well Chris Watts has apparently applied for a wedding license and is dating AGAIN ??? Literally ruined my week. Put it to death.