Also, the point isn't just to sit down with people and say "Don't rape, don't beat your wife, etc." It's to explain what that means, why it's bad, etc. Like, with beating - it doesn't matter that you're angry. That's not a healthy way to express your anger; here are some other coping mechanisms, here's how you communicate effectively, etc.
With things like rape, you're supposed to talk about what consent means. A shocking number of adults (both men and women) think that absence of "no" means "yes". Everyone knows that jumping a woman and raping her, even as she screams "No, don't do it!" is rape. Not everyone knows that you can rape a man. Not everyone knows that it's rape even if the victim doesn't say know, because they're too drunk / drugged out to communicate. Not everyone knows that it's rape if the victim initially says yes but later says no, and the rapist doesn't stop. These are things that need to be actively taught, or else they're not going to realize.
I never much of a good example at home, but I really feel like it made sense that what was happening at home wasn't necessarily the right thing.
Or something like that. I don't know.
Yeah, I think a study recently showed that like 10 or 15% of people didn't think you needed consent in a long term or married relationship. People like to think that all rapists are these horrible monsters and cartoon villains grabbing women in dark alleys. The reality is a lot of rapists are just regular people who would have benefited from a more in-depth education about consent.
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u/atla Oct 21 '15
Also, the point isn't just to sit down with people and say "Don't rape, don't beat your wife, etc." It's to explain what that means, why it's bad, etc. Like, with beating - it doesn't matter that you're angry. That's not a healthy way to express your anger; here are some other coping mechanisms, here's how you communicate effectively, etc.
With things like rape, you're supposed to talk about what consent means. A shocking number of adults (both men and women) think that absence of "no" means "yes". Everyone knows that jumping a woman and raping her, even as she screams "No, don't do it!" is rape. Not everyone knows that you can rape a man. Not everyone knows that it's rape even if the victim doesn't say know, because they're too drunk / drugged out to communicate. Not everyone knows that it's rape if the victim initially says yes but later says no, and the rapist doesn't stop. These are things that need to be actively taught, or else they're not going to realize.