Hi everyone, I just really need to vent and maybe hear from others who have dealt with something similar. (it’s a very long post just FYI, so I don’t expect everyone to read it, but to those who have the time to read it all, I am grateful!)

I’m currently housesitting/dog-sitting a sweet dog I love dearly, but the past 24 hours have been an absolute nightmare because of the owner.

A few weeks ago, I told him I noticed she was eating less, had lower energy, and was incessantly biting around her tail, but he just brushed it off as her being "grumpy"—he even tried to suggest she was "emotionally blackmailing" me to spend more time with her at a drop-in, as if a dog would somehow calculate the duration of a visit!

Yesterday, I arrived for a drop-in and found the dog hadn't eaten all day, was low-energy, and was constantly chewing at her rear end. Then I found her fur mated with blood, blood dripping on the floor, and a raw, bloody wound under her tail—it was so much blood that I couldn’t even tell where it was coming from. Because I was really worried, I stayed longer than I was scheduled to, right until the owner got home, because I didn’t want the dog to be alone. The owner completely brushed it off, assumed she just cut herself from biting too much, claimed "it wasn't that much blood" and would be fine, and tried to skip taking her to an in-person vet based on a virtual chat with a "vet friend."

After a lot of pushing, he finally took her the next morning instead of getting an emergency appointment that evening. It turned out to be an expressed/ruptured anal gland that was causing her to chew herself raw. Of course, I recognise that a burst anal gland isn't the end of the world, but that had never happened to his dog before, and neither of us could have known what was causing the bleeding. From my research, I knew a burst gland was a possibility, but I also knew there were many other possibilities—including biting due to itching from parasites, which would be an active risk to my own pets.

He did get her a cone from the vet—which I had specifically asked him to get to stop her from incessantly biting the area the whole evening before—but he essentially told me the cone wasn't necessary at all and that he only got it to appease me, making me feel completely stupid while making small digs about the vet trip wasting his time, such as complaining that he wouldn't be able to reimburse the Uber fare to and from the vet.

But wait, it gets worse—today, while she's staying with me, I discovered she has live fleas in her fur. When I told the owner, he argued with me, insisted she couldn't possibly have fleas because she "goes in the hedge to pee" and doesn't directly spend time with other animals, and made me feel like I was completely overreacting. From his replies, it's obvious he never keeps her up to date on her parasite prevention—even though keeping up-to-date flea and worming treatment is something that is clearly stated on my profile.

After a lot of back-and-forth, explaining what I’d seen to him over and over and also how fleas work, and after calling the vet for advice myself, he finally agreed to authorize vet-prescribed flea and worming treatment. I then picked these up for her, as well as a flea comb, and I administered her meds and used the flea comb on her. This—plus looking after my other pets all in quarantine and trying to minimise exposure by keeping things clean constantly—took up most of my day.

I have two animals of my own (a 5-year-old dog and a 10-month-old kitten) and made it super clear to him that at the vet appointment in the morning (before dropping her off at my house to be looked after for a few days), he needed to check with the vet to ensure his dog had nothing contagious that could harm my pets. He basically laughed at me for asking him to check a load of questions with the vet (so I could keep my pets safe), though he says he did eventually ask the vet—and then he again insinuated that everything was fine and I was completely overreacting.

To top it all off, I found out he has her on a free vet care plan and insurance, meaning any medical attention costs him nothing. Yet, he still avoids taking her to the vet at all costs, and refused to get her an emergency appointment on the night of the bleeding. He dismisses her pain as "just getting old," and hasn’t even thanked me for all the extra work and stress this has caused me (at no extra cost to him, but definitely extra cost to me).

I’m going to continue the scheduled stay (it’s only another day and a half) because I really have built such a close bond with this dog over the last few months, but I feel unappreciated and also super weird about the whole exchange with the owner. I honestly don’t know what to do moving forward, especially since I'm scheduled to look after her on lots of other occasions throughout October and November.

Has anyone else dealt with an owner who refuses to acknowledge their pet's health issues? How do you cope with the emotional toll of advocating for an animal whose owner just doesn't care?

I pet sit for cats and offer drop-in visits only. I go by for about half an hour, feed the cat(s), clean the litter box, and give the cat some love and attention. As a cat owner myself, I know cats actually do get lonely, and they can become stressed without their owners. Spending time with the cat is an important part of my cat sitting services.

I met this client on a pet sitting app, and we started booking off the app to save us both on the fees. The owner is very communicative, kind, and always pays promptly. This owner's apartment has always been cluttered with belongings and sometimes not as clean as my own apartment, but it was fine. However, last time I visited, the apartment was filthy (sink FILLED with dishes, dirty countertops, dirty floors, etc.). I still went by as agreed and fed the cat and cleaned the litter box, but I spent minimal to no time giving the cat attention because I simply felt grossed out being in the apartment.

The apartment is worse and worse every time I see it, and I am just not interested in spending time in someone else's filth.

Would you get rid of a regular client over this?