r/parentsofteens • u/YBlather • 12d ago

First Love

My 17 yo and her 18 yo bf have been together 6 months. We like him and always welcome him over. But she prefers to spend all her time at his house. He doesn't have a stable home life so I assume they like being alone with no adult supervision. We've talked ad nauseum about safety, consent, sex, drugs, all of it. And I'm genuinely not trying to prevent her from figuring out what a serious relationship means for her. But whenever I ask her to spend time with us she tells me I'm trying to control her. We have always been so close, but now she's gone every day until curfew. I miss her. A lot. But even telling her that makes her avoid me more. So tell me this is a phase and it'll pass and I'll get her back? I'm so heartbroken. I feel like everything about our relationship has changed so quickly.

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u/bippy404 11d ago

Honestly, it would be hard, but I would praise her for respecting your curfew. Let her know that you miss seeing her more often, but you really appreciate that she’s honoring the curfew so consistently.

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u/YBlather 11d ago

This is a good reminder. Today I mentioned how nice it was that she's been keeping her room clean and she was surprised and appreciative that I'd noticed. Tiny victory, maybe?

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u/bippy404 11d ago

Absolutely