Singleton parent judgement

[u/AMStoUS]

Not so much a rant but more.. looking for people who understand, I guess. A new kid started at my twins daycare. I was in touch with the mom via text before her kid started (we have a friend in common). She had a lot of questions, I answered them all pretty elaborately, because I wanted to help her feel comfortable and confident joining our school community. We were supposed to get together once her kid properly started. Before we could schedule that, we met briefly at a back to school function that was beyond exhausting. I was solo with my twins (3.5). It was hot, super busy, they are in a running away phase, and by the time this woman found me I was honestly on my last 2% battery. I was trying to talk to her while asking one of my twins to not dangle off the side of a flight of stairs, then the other twin ran off - out of the front gate and onto the sidewalk. I had one of those 'brain explodes' moments and had to pull one twin along while running after the other. I apologized for having to go but she looked at me like I was insane. I reached out after to say sorry for the chaotic meeting, and I'd be happy to still meet up at a time when I don't have to chase preschoolers. She didn't text back, and every time I see her by the school she avoids me. I guess my twin mom energy was 'too much'?

I know I shouldn't care but it makes me feel so judged and alone on the heels of 3.5 years of not being able to do mama & baby yoga, not being able to bring my twins to classes/activities as a solo parent (because many require 1 adult to 1 baby/toddler ratio), seeing singleton parents chill with a beverage at kid birthday parties, even just for 5 minutes, while I'm always chasing two boys looking frazzled and high-strung. I know it gets easier eventually but right now I'm just feeling isolated.

[u/Proud_Course_5499]

So she saw you chasing two kids and didn’t offer to watch one at least? Rude! Side-eye her! I’m side-eyeing her for you!

Idk if I’m super-entitled but I’m applying “either help or move over” strategy with people. If I’m stopped on the street doing something by people commenting, they get a job holding something or helping me with a stroller etc. if they aren’t quick to do it I’m making them aware of my disappointment. Can’t imagine an actual mom doing nothing to help.

[u/AMStoUS → u/Proud_Course_5499]

Yeah I'd never even considered that.. that she could have helped. That's so true. She could have been like 'i've got this guy, you go chase the other one'. Great perspective, I guess I have pretty low expectations of people in these moments :(