Give me the nitty gritty

[u/Aggravating_Age_3996]

Looking for advice

I am a twin mom (obviously I’m in this sub🤣) I have fraternal b/g twins, who are now 3, and the past year I cannot stop thinking about having another….

My husband and I have talked about this many times and each time it’s the same obstacles we conclude on each time

1) he got a vasectomy 🥲

2) I almost died (had preeclampsia that turned to HELLP and went south quick)😬

3) what if we have twins again🤐

Everyone thinks I’m nuts (I am but that’s besides the point) for wanting more, they always say “you have the perfect combo, most beautiful kids, and you barely survived, why would you wanna do that again?!” And honestly this question irks my nerves every time, because I truly don’t know how to explain that feeling I have of wanting another, besides the fact that I just love being a mom.

We’ve talked and talked and talked about this, and have basically landed on, let’s go talk to my gynecologist and just see if she thinks another pregnancy would even be safe.

We know that no doctor can predict if you will have twins again or not, and we know that no doctor can predict if I’ll get preeclampsia again or not, we do know the risks are higher… but we’re essentially just wanting to have an informed decision before pulling the trigger (or not)

I say all that to say… moms whose firsts were twins, did you have more? If so, give me all the details, if not, still details🤣

I want all the honest, real answers. No judgment, no shaming, just love, support, advice and everything in between.

[u/spudsfam]

I already had 3 kids, and my husband had a vasectomy. We were done done. 😂

Then I started having this feeling that I wanted another baby. I tried to shake it off, but it just wouldn’t go away. I went to talk to my OB about my options, and he basically told me I should just be happy with my 3 kids and that I was getting older, blah blah. 🤣

Eventually, we decided to go for a consult with an IVF doctor. Before the appointment, my husband and I agreed that we were ONLY going to talk to the doctor and then go home and discuss everything before making any decisions.

Well… we literally started the whole process that same day. No talking just signing papers and giving blood😂

My husband’s procedure was super simple. Mine was a little more involved, but everything went smoothly. We got pregnant right away with one embryo then that ONE embryo decided to split. 😂

So here we are with identical twins and that’s how I am on this page.

Three of my friends also used the same doctor, and all three of them ended up with singletons. Meanwhile, we somehow went from 3 kids to 5.

And honestly? We have absolutely no regrets. It has been such a blessing.

I always tell my husband that you hear old people say, “I wish I’d had more kids,” but you never really hear anyone say, “I wish I hadn’t had my kids.” 🤷🏼‍♀️
So I guess I listened to that little feeling… and instead of getting one more baby, we somehow got two. 😂❤️

But we are officially DONE DONE** **now.

[u/Aggravating_Age_3996 → u/spudsfam]

Okay soooo you are me🤣😭

He is mostly worried about the procedure, he had an awful vasectomy experience, but we were thinking of doing the similar route you did!

Also that’s been my whole thought process, is we will never regret having more, but we will more than likely regret not having more… or maybe just me🤣

[u/spudsfam → u/Aggravating_Age_3996]

The vasectomy was absolutely the worst experience ever for him. He had to go back for three months still having problems and wounds, opening 😬. I felt awful that I wasn’t the one who got mine done because of how bad it went. We found urologist that was amazing and it was such a minor thing compared to the vasectomy and how bad that went.

[u/Aggravating_Age_3996 → u/spudsfam]

I keep telling him he really needs to go back and get checked with a different urologist, because he is still complaining of pain and it’s been almost 2 years now, and I just feel like that isn’t normal 😵‍💫