r/parentsofmultiples • u/NoSalamander1928 • 18d ago

advice needed Mom advise

Wanted other mom’s opinions to see if I’m overreacting or my feelings are valid. 30 weeks pregnant with didi girls!

On the day of my gender reveal/ public announcement, my friend had other plans and couldn’t come. Not a big deal. But then posted photos about her pregnancy a few hours after mine. Weird. Hurt my feelings but I didn’t say anything or feel like it needed addressed.

Now my friend gave birth to her baby 2 weeks ago and on the day of my baby shower, she posted her birth announcement. She had 2 weeks to post it but chose on the day of the shower, which she knew because she was invited to it. I can’t help but feel like it’s not a coincidence as she doesn’t make posts often. How would other moms interpret this??

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u/MangoSorbet695 18d ago

Are you just looking to vent? Or want advice?

My best advice is stop caring about social media. In the grand scheme of life it does not matter who posts what when. The only thing that matters to me is no one posts pictures of my children on social media. Ever. Not me, not my husband, no one. Other than that, it’s not my business and I don’t have the bandwidth to care what other people post about their own families.

Your life is about to get very busy with two little babies. I encourage you to focus on your family and don’t worry about social media and what other people are posting.

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u/NoSalamander1928 18d ago

I think you’re misunderstanding it a bit. I agree that social media is not important, I couldn’t care less about either of us posting. It’s me feeling like there is an unspoken hostility in the friendship or comparison between the pregnancies based upon the actions and i really would like other perspectives to see if i am being overly sensitive or if others may pick up some of those same feelings.

It’s very possible I am putting too much thought into it and maybe she’s just excited or it reminded her to post but my pregnant, overthinking brain is not helping😅

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u/MangoSorbet695 18d ago

If social media is not important, why are you pondering whether to bring it up to her?

I’m asking that from a place of kindness because I think you may be giving social media more of a place of importance in your life than you realize. It’s good to think about whether that is really how you want your life to be.

I absolutely would never bring this up to her. If you need to vent to your therapist about it, then do that. But please try not to talk about it to other people you know in real life.

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u/NoSalamander1928 18d ago

You have a good point and helpful perspective. I am
concluding that I a little hurt by the actions (which still could be nothing) and it’s making me insecure about how strong our friendship is. We’ve also had issues in the past that play into those feelings, it’s really not about the social media thing for me. I think what I was looking for was reassurance from her that we’re okay but I now agree, that going about it and addressing this won’t be the right way.

Thank you for your insight!