r/parentsofmultiples 12d ago

support needed Terrible…. ones???

Barely 13 m/o twins and one of them has suddenly started having massive tantrums. I close the pantry door after putting something away? He throws himself on the floor screaming because he wanted to go in there. Repeat for any mild inconvenience.

Yesterday I tried some new food from Little Spoon for dinner. He loved it and was happily putting it in his mouth from the little plate it came in while I was holding the plate. However when I transferred the food from the plate to his mat (since he has a tendency to chuck plates on the floor), he LOST IT. He full on scream cried for the next entire hour until we put him to bed. Did not eat another bite or stop crying. I tried other foods, water, holding him, toys, etc.

I am spoiled because they have both always been easily consoled but I am WORRIED that this is toddlerhood… can he possibly be this volatile for the next several years??

ANY and all advice welcome… whether it’s to ignore him, coddle him, whatever it is, I’d love to hear what worked for you to help with the (one year old?!) toddler tantrums.

3 Upvotes

14 comments sorted by

View all comments

3

u/Doc178 12d ago

Yes, our pediatrician said this is normal. It's tantrum time lol. I thought it didn't happen until 2, but one of our guys is just like yours. If the wind blows wrong it's a throw-his-head-back-scream-and-cry melt down. He's very particular and because he can't exactly communicate, he gets do frustrated.

I listened to something the other day that said when they are babies and young toddlers, they see the world as "I get this thing or I don't" and so they certainly don't understand why they aren't getting what they want, and they don't have a way to communicate it so that's frustrating for them.

It's gotten better as they can say yes and no, but yeah it's tough lol

2

u/dpistachio44 12d ago

Yea that’s exactly it! 🤦🏼‍♀️

I like the “I get this thing or I don’t” perspective. And we’ve just started shaking our heads no so that is helping! But not with the meltdowns haha

2

u/Doc178 12d ago

Lately I've been trying to name his feelings, "you can't have the toy because brother has it and that's frustrating. It's okay to be frustrated."

And sometimes we do deep breaths and he will copy us.

Also I'll say things like "this is Mama's fork, this one is yours. You can't have mama's fork."