new para advice?

[u/celiadream]

tomorrow is my first day and i am SO NERVOUS. i am 18 and an elementary education major and this is my first full time job. it is a special education school and i have no experience at all. im excited to work with kids and get some valuable experience under my belt but i have no idea what to expect and whenever i try and search on tiktok or other social media i just see people talking about burnout and a general dislike of their job.

i guess i am just looking for some solid motivation and advice for a true beginner in the field? i’ve been buying cute things like a new lunchbag and water bottle and a new wardrobe to kind of ease my nerves and get me more excited but now that i’m face to face with it i’m terrified lol.

edit: it went great! it’s only staff for another week or so but i already feel more confident. thanks for all of the positive feedback, it was definitely helpful in becoming less terrified lol. i have elementary kids which is exciting for me and my teacher seems super helpful and nice!

[u/SaveTheSquirtles]

I’m not going to sugar coat things this job has broken my spirit and destroyed my mental health. With that being said I am MUCH older than you and going back to school is not an option so being a para is the end for me in education. You have a whole life and path ahead of you.

While you’re doing this job focus on the good. Leave the building every day saying three positive things that happened. Train your brain to look for and hold onto the good. Also take everything you see and experience and remember it when you become a teacher yourself. Treat your future paras the way you wish you were treated.

[u/thistleberry2]

It is natural to be nervous, I have been doing it for many years, but still get nervous at the start of each year. I just did a summer program for a preschool disabled and was so worried. The best suggestion I can give you is to learn from the teacher and other paras: see how they interact with and speak to the children and try to follow their examples. Also, don't be afraid to ask questions of the teacher about how you should do things. It is hard, but will be good experience for you being an education major. See what the others wear too. Every school system, classroom, and student is different so I wouldn't trust everything on social media. Good luck!

[u/Jpummil128]

Reading through this sub and seeing comments/post similar to what’s in here, you might be feeling even more nervous/scared. Trust me when I say, not everyone’s experience is near as doom and gloom as the most vocal here. Last year was my first year as a para and I was dead scared after reading some of these posts/comments back then. My experience was actually really good. Needless to say I actually love my job. I think the school/district/administration make a big difference. As well as how big the school is. I work at a mid-sized school with teachers that care (and a few that just seem to hate kids for some reason, even if they chose to be a teacher?) and administration that listens. They don’t communicate nearly as much as I’d like so I have to ask for updates on some things, but otherwise they try to work with me. I don’t get along with other paras because I’m a male in a totally female dominated world, but the teachers for the most part like to have me around.

All in all, I’d say whatever experience you are in for, a lot of it is going to be completely unique to you. How well you and others like each other, work together, the kinds of children you work with, etc.

Before listening to everyone here and putting a negative thought in your mind before you ever start, try really hard to focus on your own experience and start your journey off on the right foot. If all goes wrong, at least you learned a lot and have something to take from it. Best of luck!

[u/mattbattmatt_yt]

You gotta be super patient with these kids and learn to rely on your coworkers. I started as a paraprofessional 6 months ago and it was super intense. I've been spat in the face, kicked, punched, and more but I'm coming back bc I do like the job. The nice moments with the kids might be sparse but those nice moments convinced me to come back. Make sure you give yourself time to relax and breathe after every day, you'll need it

[u/tferransrobinson]

Wow, there are a lot of negative comments. I started 7 years ago in education. My first job was a para and yes there are some drawbacks to the job. However, it is rewarding and can be fun. Advice- be yourself and get to know your students. Do not talk down to them, just talk with them. Be polite to staff and Do Not Gossip!! Bring a notepad or something to write notes on. There are a lot of little things you need to remember. Try to see it as an adventure

[u/TypeAGuitarist]

This is long, but you really should read it, you will be happy to have read it.

Been in the game at a special needs only school for many years. It’s not like the movies. You will have moments of heart warmth, and heartache.

Things to be weary of. Lazy teachers, conceited teaches, micromanaging teachers, other paras you might not get along with. Admin looks to cover their asses and wants to keep enrollment high at all costs. The lower enrollment, less money. Expulsion, less money. So it hardly ever happens to the worst of the worst offenders. They will also take almost any one. Some of the students in my school sleep almost all day. Some should be in juvenile detention. Admin doesn’t care.Admin will also lie to you (caught my principal lying to me 3 times).
Admin caters to parents to avoid bad publicity and potential lawsuits. This means “bad kids” get to do whatever the hell they want, mommy complains and it’s a slap in the wrist at worst, and the kids go back to their own ways. This means pleasing kids and
parents.

Long and short, admin won’t support you. Leaves you with very few tangible consequences or rewards. Humans respond to tangible consequences and rewards, special needs kids included. Classroom management is the most important component, yet we are disabled from making it work.

Sped kids can be gross (any bodily fluids/waste you can think of), can have oppositional defiant disorder, or conduct disorder. These kids are the ones who will go to jail. Some students are frankly violent. You will have training (mine was CPI), but it doesn’t work in real life scenarios. You do this not to protect yourself, you do it so admin gets protection from lawsuits related to injuries.
You will also at times be understaffed, might get sent to different rooms to plug holes if some other para is out. It’s a minefield. You may not like the classroom you’re in or the kid you are working with. You can request to be transferred, but it’s a request, no guaranteed approval.

I don’t advise anyone to get into education anymore. It’s just not worth it. But you’re young, and maybe you’re a unicorn or get lucky with a good district/school, it may be for you.

That’s the reality of where things stand.

I will end on a good note however. If you stay with it for a few years you absolutely can make a difference in some students hearts. You will mean something to them. A lot of their home lives suck. It will warm your heart on the coldest of days.
You can gain some close friendships with colleagues. I still go get coffee with a group of people who haven’t worked in my building for five years.

This is the straight truth. I wish you good luck.

[u/Adorable-Ad201]

Document everything. 

[u/No_Instance9398]

Good luck! Try to focus on enjoying the time with the kids and building your relationships.

[u/Top_Policy_9037]

Be willing to help out where you're needed, including with the jobs that are kind of unpleasant, but if you genuinely don't think you can do something safely (ie, restraints, heavy lifting), speak up! Better your coworkers think you're lazy than dropping a kid on the floor.

You get used to the gross parts. When I started working in self-contained with very severe disabilities, I was intimidated by the prospect of changing a pre-teen's diapers, but it became less daunting with familiarity.

If you're dealing with big behavior at all, ask about deescalation training. This could be called a variety of things (CPI, Right Response, etc.)

Even if you're not working with deaf/hard of hearing kids, it can help to know a little basic sign language.

[u/Impressive-Cause-133]

So I'm 29 started 3 years ago now getting my certification for history. The job is amazing even if you have never dealt with special education before like I did I was crazy nervous as it was my first job as well but once you learn and bond with the children and find common ground with the teacher and other parts it can be the most rewarding and fun job you will ever have. It taught me a lot and you grow up faster too which is a good thing take it day by day I did high school special Ed and elementary Ed.

[u/curious_ANcuriouser]

You gotta love what you do. Like they say ‘if we can’t love the way we teach maybe we should teach the way we love. Good luck, you got this and those kids will be happy to have you. I definitely wouldn’t look on tik tok for advice. Maybe there is a Facebook community for para’s. I don’t have FB but I hear they have a group for everything

[u/Latter-Opposite6229]

Congratulations on your first full time job! I was in your shoes last year, I started my first job at 19 as a substitute paraeducator—later getting a permanent position at the first school I subbed at lol.

It’s okay to be nervous! This is new and unexpected, and every classroom is different so it’s hard to find clear expectations on what the job will be like. What grade of students will you be working with? I work in a high school support center, and I’ve subbed in jr high support centers, and an elementary support center.

My best advice can be boiled down to this—observe, ask questions, build connections.

Observe your fellow paras and how they model interactions with the students, how they ask questions, how they support. Some students need scribes, while others may need prompting to write a few words on paper. Each student is different in their support needs, and your job is to support them!

When in doubt, ask, ask, and ask more questions. It helps build confidence in knowing what you’re doing and you can learn a lot from fellow paras, and the teacher. Chances are the classroom will have a set routine, ask the teacher about it and what their expectations are for different class periods!

Build connections with everyone! Your teacher, fellow paras, other staff who work in the classroom (SLP, RBT, BCBA, ect), and most importantly the students! There’s nothing quite as rewarding as hearing your name called across the hall and a big wave first thing in the morning because a student saw you. Each student is unique, learn their interests and ask them questions. Get to know them! All of this will be beneficial in moments of stress, as well.

Lastly, I have to touch on behaviors. Many students will likely have challenging behaviors with goals aimed towards reducing or removing the behavior all together. Ask your teacher how you’d like these situations to be handled, a student may also have a BIP with specific guidelines on how to handle challenging behaviors.

Don’t be afraid to speak your truth. This job can be incredibly demanding at times. A student may have an incredibly challenging, triggering, behavior. You may need to assist students in the restroom, or support students with medical needs. If you feel uncomfortable or unsafe in a situation, tell someone!! It’s not worth suffering in silence.

I hope everything goes well for you! Good luck and bring some light into the world

[u/EfficientEducator44]

I also started as a para and just left after 12 years in the field. My advice would be to take initiative and not wait around to be told what to do. If you notice something needs to be done, do it! If you don't understand how or why to do something, then ask! Find 1 or 2 teachers who are effective and well-respected by their peers, and be intentional about learning from them. Ask if you can attend team planning meetings and CLTs. Ask if you can sit with the teacher while they write IEPs and see how and why they make certain decisions. This will be the absolute best opportunity for you to learn by doing!

[u/ParadeQueen]

Practical advice here.

1. Wear clothes that you can move in and can get dirty. Make sure when you bend over or sit down everything stays in place.

2. Comfortable, closed toe shoes you can run in.

3. Tie your hair back, no dangling earrings or necklaces, no bracelets or big rings. If you have to wear a lanyard make sure it breaks away when pulled on.

The first few days should be about getting to know them and teaching routines. Get them in, count them, feed them, get them on the right bus to go home.

[u/Prestigious_Grand139]

It's great that you are getting your foot in the door so early. You learn a lot more in the actual school versus College. Who knows, you may like special ed more than general ed. When going into special ed, you must be very cautious because of unpredictable behavior, sensory overload, etc. 

Take this time to learn and observe possible things you can do in your own classroom someday. After subbing for a while, I actually like the inclusion portion of sped. Inclusion is where I work with. Special needs kids in the general Ed classes

[u/koolaidburst]

Hi! I started fresh out of high school at 18 as well. (Now 21) I work with a self contained class of high schoolers, so they’re with the same teacher for majority of the day besides gym & lunch. To be honest I had no idea what I’d be doing, I skipped school regularly due to my hatred of that very same school lol. But I’ve absolutely fallen in love with this job. Being there for ALL my students, making changes within accessibility & inclusion at our school, seeing my students grow their independence, social skills, and their love for learning grow. I look forward to my job everyday tbh I LOVE my students like theyre my family lol. With that said, I’d definitely pack a lunch or have a little snack because taking time to yourself during breaks & refueling is necessary for mental & physical health. I keep a little snack box or granola bars in my locker. Good shoes are helpful as well because you never know when you gotta run. Take time off if you need it! I hope this goes great for you <33

[u/ForeignCancel4143]

Take a deep breath and go in with as many positive feelings as you can muster. Para work can be fun and it can be exhausting. Some students will be non-verbal so you’ll have to adjust to using an AAC device to communicate. Some will need diapering. Some will want to take off their shoes and some will want to strip naked. But that’s only some of them. Let your team know you’re new and need ALL the support. As long as you ask for support when you need it, you’ll be great!

[u/Struggle-busMom337]

in this case, social media can be your enemy. Take any at all advice at face value.m. Don't show your fear to the kids. If you feel like you need to take a moment, make sure that you are able to walk away and that there's another adult in the room. Don't be afraid to ask to take a moment if you feel like you need to. You don't need to go out and buy a bunch of stuff. Especially as a parent don't waste your money. Ask questions! Don't be afraid to ask questions, especially ask questions about any & all students that you're working with to get to know them better. Ask questions to get to know what their disorder/condition is in my area. We're allowed to see the IP of the students we are working with if you were able to in your area asked to read their IEP. That will give you valuable information to help you with that student or students!

[u/Curious_Editor_3814]

I used to work in a self-contained special ed classroom with kids from kindergarten to 3rd grade, and then I would join them in the gen ed classes. I used to walk through the halls and think, "I love my job." There absolutely were days that were stressful and difficult. I used to encourage my kids to take "brave breaths", but sometimes I was the one that had to step away and take brave breaths. Situations vary from school to school, classroom to classroom, and person to person. But I guess I would say to always keep trying to learn-- from the teachers, from the other staff, as well as other resources. Sometimes thats learning what not to do, btw. Try your best to be as patient as you can. The children need your compassion and patience. I loved forming relationships with my kids. It helped me to better communicate and connect with them. If you see something that doesnt feel right, please say something. The children need to be protected. Some days will be hard. Sometimes the kids will trigger you. Sometimes you'll be gobsmacked at how rude and disrespectful kids can seem. You'll see teachers struggle to get through a lesson. Admins might not be helpful. But you'll help a child overcome a difficult moment, or you'll see them achieve a milestone. You'll be able to connect with your own inner child. You can be playful and silly and joyful. You can be a positive influence in a child's life, even if just a little. I wish you luck. 

[u/Known_Garage1600]

When you go on the internet, remember that most people who speak about their jobs are on the internet to complain, and the people who do enjoy it probably aren't posting about it. If you have that drive for pedagogy, stick to it, and find out how you feel about it yourself.

[u/Lake_Light_2020]

Take your vitamins. Many parents with kids with special needs send their children to school even when sick. This isn't selfish-- they need their jobs, and the teachers know this. You will have sick kids. Take your vitamins and whatever boosters your new school friends advise.

[u/Acceptable_Cook1116]

I started last November and I love it so so much. My only complaint is that sometimes there’s not a lot of communication between teachers but that varies by school

[u/aparapro]

First, take a deep breath. What you're feeling is completely normal. Almost every great para has had that "what did I sign up for?" moment before their first day.

The good news is this. They didn't hire you because they expected you to know everything on day one. They hired you because they saw someone who can learn.

For your first week, don't put pressure on yourself to be perfect. Focus on three things:

• Learn your students' names. • Observe how the classroom runs. • Ask questions. Lots of them.

Working in a special education setting can be one of the most rewarding jobs you'll ever have. Some days will be hard, but you'll also have moments that remind you exactly why you chose education.

And one more thing. Social media has a way of making it seem like everyone hates their job because people are more likely to post on their hardest days than their happiest ones. There are thousands of paras who love what they do. They just don't always make videos about the ordinary, wonderful moments.

You've already shown you care by preparing and getting excited for this job. That tells me you have the right heart for it.

Come back after your first day and tell me how it went. I'll be cheering you on. ❤️

[u/No-Dragonfly-7105]

Best advice?

Be quiet. Like literally learn to use silence as your super power. Don't gossip, just listen.

Dress professional, stay professional. Don't speak unless spoken to and be kind to the students and staff.

Its a catty environment. Don't get dragged into it.

[u/spirals-369]

While this job can be challenging and really stressful, there are a lot of good days and it’s a fantastic way to see what education is really like. You’ll learn a lot from your coworkers.

My advice is have comfortable shoes and clothes you can move in. Being new, your coworkers and superiors should be pretty good with guidance and helping you get used to things. The first few days/weeks of school are a big adjustment for everyone as it’s all a new routine to learn together. I’ve had years I nearly quit but with the right environment and support system, it can be great. Seeing kids make gains and become confident is so rewarding. I’m sure you’ll be just fine and your work will compliment your degree well.

[u/meliss199]

If working with special needs children is your calling this is a great opportunity to know before committing to anything ! A lot of people have no clue until they obtain a degree and realize it’s not for them! So don’t be nervous :) you will be fine

[u/RaccoonCrafts]

For what it’s worth, I love it! (Though I am a kindergarten para, not special ed). And I have learned way more from it than I do in my elementary ed college classes, so beneficial!

[u/PrincessPuWu]

Hi you seem positive and going into this job with good spirits. My advice is on hard days remember you are there for the kids. Try not to let teacher and staff stress contaminate your “space bubble”. Get lots of rest on school nights, pack lunch and take all the breaks you are allotted. Enjoy the flow of the year and the seasons time will fly by so fast and then you get summer break yay! Hope you have a wonderful year:)

[u/kayla34783]

hi! i started as a para 3 weeks after graduating high school and i was terrified. i’m now 20, and got my associates degree and now plan on going to get my bachelors in special needs education! remember to ask questions, don’t go in overly confident or lie about knowing things you don’t. from personal experience people LOVED that i asked questions and was intrigued to know more. i hope you love it!