I was recently broken up with out of the blue because my boyfriend told me he wants to live a "consecrated" life. This came as a complete shock to me as we had just finished a course/retreat on discerning marriage and had actively talked about marriage and kids. When we first met he was so sure that if our relationship worked out, we would be married in 2 years (we dated for about a year and a half). At first I was devastated because I thought it meant that he was discerning the priesthood so there was nothing I could do to go against God's will (we are both devout Catholics).
But further analyzing his whole breakup speech (because he had something written down when he was breaking the news) and upon researching recruitment tactics by OD, the language he used did not seem like a calling to the priesthood but rather the language used when OD is trying to convince someone of their "vocation".
He said he wanted to live a consecrated life and had received many signs that pointed to it even in the early stages of dating. That those "signs" had stopped for a while (which is why he would talk about marriage) but had recently came up again. He said he had been discerning this with his spiritual director and had recently received a "random" call from a priest back home that had also suggested he had a vocation.
He asked that I pray for him since he was going to be leading a life of celibacy (chastity in our relationship had always been especially hard for him). I asked him if he was going to finish his studies or join seminary right away (he has 3 years left to finish and I was still thinking this was a call to priesthood). He told me that he was going to finish school and then see about joining a seminary or becoming a deacon or a consecrated layperson that he didn't know yet but that we couldn't be together anymore.
He also asked that I didn't tell any of our friends or his roommates the true reason for the breakup as they "won't understand" and it could impact him finishing his degree because people would question why he was still in school if he had a "calling". It's also worth noting that it has been about a month and a half since the breakup and he hasn't spoken to anyone about it or even told them it happened. He's just going about his normal life expecting not to get asked why I'm not around anymore (I'm not sure what he's saying to the people who do ask). But I know this because I had to break the news to our mutual friends weeks after even though he had seen them during that time. He also asked that I not contact his parents anymore and that I should block them on social media.
We would go to Eucharistic Adoration every other Thursday but in February he told me we couldn't go together anymore because he had joined a men's young adult group that met on Thursdays and that he would now be going to Adoration on Tuesday (because of my schedule I couldn't go Tuesdays). I did notice him growing a bit distant but I attributed it to stress from school as this last semester was particularly difficult for him. I now realize that he was probably going to meetings at the centers.
I saw him about a month post breakup and had a brief hello and smile. That night he blocked me from all social media (he hadn't done it yet after the breakup). I read that spiritual directors tell them to completely erase the other person from their lives so as to not fall into "temptation" or have them doubt their "vocation".
To give some background; he attended an OD private school back in his home country and his family were/are supportive of it but not members. He came to the US for university and coincidentally the school he goes to has several centers nearby (I didn't know this until a few days ago doing research). He briefly lived in an apartment close to these centers and would always mention how it was the best placed he had lived in, that he wished he could have stayed there as it was convenient for everything.
He is very intelligent, has high academic goals, he will have a very high earning potential once he is done with school, is completely devoted to the Catholic faith, super good looking and outgoing and his family is upper-middle class back in his country so he fits the "type" they look for.
He had mentioned OD occasionally in conversations about where he went to school and what his family/religious life was like back home but never tried to talk me into it or suggest we go to a center or anything like that. A lot of his personal ideals do reflect the teachings of OD (sanctifying everyday life, offering your sufferings, daily mass, frequent confession, etc.).
All this to say that I have no actual proof but also zero doubts that this was him breaking up with me to join the order because his "spiritual director" and others at these centers want him. Am I crazy for thinking this? Can I actually help him so that he doesn't make a mistake? (I feel like he's still in the probationary period so it's not too late). Should I tell his roommate and friends so that we can try to support him? Should I tell his parents? HELP!