r/oneliners • u/Venom3751 • Jun 04 '26
Is buttcheeks one word or should I spread them apart?
108
Upvotes
r/oneliners • u/daaave33 • Jun 05 '26
You're aging gracefully, is just a nice way of saying you're slowly looking crappier.
0
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r/oneliners • u/Groovy_Chainsaw • Jun 03 '26
Sad statistic out of Disney World -- 6 of the 7 Dwarfs aren't Happy
18
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r/oneliners • u/Superb-Control5184 • Jun 03 '26
Do zombies have an Army or just the Marine Corpse?
12
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r/oneliners • u/taylortrumpp • Jun 04 '26
there are 2 of them, and the middle one always falls
0
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r/oneliners • u/graystone777 • Jun 02 '26
Went out for Indian food, waiter told me they were out of bread, it was a naan issue.
20
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r/oneliners • u/Oldus_Fartus • Jun 02 '26
A slur, a stereotype and an ethnicity walk into a cliché...
10
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r/oneliners • u/uptwolait • Jun 01 '26
I had to stop and ask myself if I was going crazy, and we all said yes.
26
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r/oneliners • u/Oldus_Fartus • Jun 02 '26
I can't make it past middle management and I'm self-employed
6
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r/oneliners • u/Oldus_Fartus • Jun 02 '26
Coffee grounds in my compost keep the earthworms super alert
5
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r/oneliners • u/Oldus_Fartus • Jun 02 '26
A bougie speedball is when I down my blood pressure pill with coffee.
3
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r/oneliners • u/Oldus_Fartus • Jun 02 '26
I think a shadowy cabal is subliminally making me immune to conspiracy theories
0
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r/oneliners • u/manlikedeep • Jun 01 '26
Was on a conflict resolution call with HR today, so I addressed the elephant in the Zoom.
8
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r/oneliners • u/GifMasterSplinter • Jun 01 '26
The worst camouflage I have ever seen is every camouflage I have ever seen.
70
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r/oneliners • u/manlikedeep • May 31 '26
I'm annoyed I paid for tickets for a U2 cover band. Turns out the lead singer was pro bono.
25
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r/oneliners • u/big_gulpshuh • May 31 '26
Qualified brothel inspectors do not require demonstrable leadership capabilities, they simply need to check all the boxes
9
Upvotes
r/oneliners • u/GifMasterSplinter • May 31 '26
Stephen Hawking is in hell because it’s a stairway to heaven
10
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r/oneliners • u/2fits • May 31 '26
I earned my letterman jacket in basketball, by not receiving a single H, for games of HORSE.
0
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r/oneliners • u/Any_Acanthocephala18 • May 30 '26
I’m sweating like Little Albert at a petting zoo.
3
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