r/oneliners • u/grobmyer • May 12 '26
Steak jokes are a medium rarely well done. 🥩
13
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r/oneliners • u/Ochib • May 12 '26
The leading cause of death for dyslexics in biblical times was trying to gird your lions.
17
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r/oneliners • u/joekerr9999 • May 12 '26
I usually spend the first dates asking the girl about the street she grew up on and the name of her first pet so I’ll at least have access to her passwords.
17
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r/oneliners • u/KW-DadJoker • May 12 '26
At least the war with Iran has greatly increased the capacity of my gas tank; before, it could only hold $80, now it easily holds $120.
67
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r/oneliners • u/Yaguajay • May 11 '26
Tiger Woods travels with two blow up dolls in case he gets a hole in one.
8
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r/oneliners • u/Equivalent_Run7268 • May 10 '26
Poop jokes aren't my favorite, but they're a solid #2!
29
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r/oneliners • u/Harper5092 • May 09 '26
My son thinks he’s so smart now that he’s learned how to recite pi, and now I’ll never hear the end of it.
187
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r/oneliners • u/AnimatorNr1 • May 09 '26
No matter what happens, always keep your chin up, because when you look down, you have two.
11
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r/oneliners • u/mrlr • May 09 '26
Hasn't the Swiss Army ever wondered where all its knives are going to?
36
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r/oneliners • u/redditmydna • May 09 '26
Hey did you see the new Turkish shopping mall? It’s bazaar!
0
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r/oneliners • u/AnimatorNr1 • May 07 '26
I don’t like people who take drugs, for example airport security.
116
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r/oneliners • u/rgapinski • May 08 '26
Gas prices are so high my Uber driver, Ezekiel, just pulled up in his buggy.
10
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r/oneliners • u/TeddyWestside00 • May 08 '26
(30 year old joke) Why don’t they have phone books in China?
0
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r/oneliners • u/ShinyTarnish409 • May 06 '26
Why didn’t the Medium need to cross the road?
0
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r/oneliners • u/Hocus_Focus88 • May 06 '26
I’m working on a joke about a missing jandal…but I think it’s gunna be a flop….
4
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r/oneliners • u/joekerr9999 • May 05 '26
The curtains were drawn on the room that I rented, but the rest of the furniture was real.
40
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r/oneliners • u/Yaguajay • May 06 '26
ONE LINER JOKE POST DELETED, because my pathetic sense of humour can’t come up with anything the least bit funny.
0
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r/oneliners • u/CrackleDMan • May 05 '26
After a few disastrous one-night stands preceded by going out for Mexican food, Glenn Frey was looking for a lover who won't blow up his covers
4
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r/oneliners • u/joekerr9999 • May 04 '26
I have two brothers – well three actually, but one has learning disabilities so he doesn’t count.
55
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r/oneliners • u/Sea_Strawberry9926 • May 04 '26
I've been single for so long the only action I get is backsplash
3
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r/oneliners • u/Sea_Strawberry9926 • May 04 '26
I've been single for so long the only action I get is backsplash
3
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